Sins Of The Soul
by Splendor734
Summary: Courtney yearns to move on with her life. She and Jax are divorced and it's time to start anew but what happens when she realizes that her feelings for Jason, who just so happens to be married to a pregnant Sam, never left?
1. Chapter 1

**Sins of the Soul **

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any GH characters –not that I would want to. Okay, maybe Jason … oh, ahem. No. I do not own any GH characters.

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****Chapter 1**

She was seated at her usual spot in Kelly's. It had been so long since she worked there. But it seemed like just yesterday when she was handed a check for a 10 million dollars –all for saving some little dog. She smiled at the thought. 10 million dollars had provided her with a lot. Expensive suits, spontaneous trips to Monte Carlo and most of all, respect. But one thing was for sure: dollars couldn't wrap their arms around you and keep you warm at night. Her thoughts were broken when she watched them walk in. His arm was protectively wrapped around her waist –and they were laughing as they entered. The man walked toward the counter as his spouse caught eye contact with the blonde and walked over.

"Hi Courtney," she said pulling out a chair and sitting down. Courtney forced a smile and greeted her back. She had no idea when this woman and her became friendly. She noticed the thin diamond tennis bracelet on the brunette's wrist. It was beautiful. It was from him.

"So, um, how's the baby, Sam?" Courtney asked. She watched as a smile spread across Sam's face. She put her hands up in delight.

"Perfectly healthy," she reported. "Oh, I'm so excited Courtney! I can't wait to find out the sex of the baby. I'm praying for a little girl. Jason wants a boy of course. But then again, he'll be happy as long as the baby is happy."

A light shut off in Courtney as Sam continued to go on about the newest addition to the Morgan household.

"You ready?" Jason asked Sam, walking up to their table. Courtney noticed how he avoided eye contact with her.

"Hi Jason," she said. Courtney watched as he tensed up. He acknowledged her with a nod and proceeded to walk same out of the diner.

Courtney sighed and closed her eyes and wondered about her relationship with Jason. When did he suddenly ignore her? Suddenly dismiss her presence in the room? Act as if she didn't exist? And when did Sam suddenly decide to come down from her high and mighty throne and turn friendly? It was as if him and Sam traded personalities. She threw a twenty-dollar bill on the table for the waitress and walked out.

_**Carly's Apartment**_

"Where did we take a wrong turn, Carly?" asked Courtney holding her drink. She and her best friend were on the comfortable suede couch. Their shoes kicked off, legs curled up, completely and totally comfortable. It had sort of become a type of ritual whenever they visited one another. Sit up, complain, bitch, whatever –it was a time to put everything on the table.

A look of confusion fell on Carly's face. "What do you mean?"

Courtney rubbed her forehead. "Well, you know … how did we end up like this? You know … sitting and gossiping and totally alone –"

"Wait a minute!" Carly laughed cutting her off. "I am inot/i alone. I'm single … I'm a single mother … I'm a single mother living by herself … okay, so maybe I am alone but, Jesus, you don't have to rub it in my face. Gee, thanks, friend."

Courtney giggled. She was serious though. Maybe Carly didn't _act_ lonely but deep down Courtney knew she was –and she herself could definitely relate.

"But don't you ever wish you were in love?" asked Courtney. "Don't you wish you had someone to come home to? To laugh with? To even argue with? Silence can be deafening sometimes, you know?"

Carly smirked. "Yeah, well, sometimes … but I don't obsess over it. If something is meant to be then … it'll happen. But, come on, you have to admit that its fun not having to constantly look over our shoulders in fear that we may get kidnapped or blown to pieces in some car bomb. Or, God forbid, we ask a simple question and receive that old infamous lecture about 'The Code'. We don't have to have guards follow us to retrieve the damn mail. You know, it's … peaceful. Its sort of fun proving that we can make it on our own, that we don't need men to get us through the day or the week."

"But it gets awful lonely sometimes," replied Courtney in a low voice. She clutched her drink. "Sometimes … I see Jason and Sam and I just …"

"You just want something you can't have," finished Carly. And the crazy thing was –Carly was right.


	2. Chapter 2

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****Chapter 2**

Courtney walked behind Carly as they made their way down the stairs and towards the docks. They had just cleaned out every single boutique and department store known to man on their side of town and they were exhausted –well, Courtney was.

"Carly, hold on, let's sit for a while," said Courtney walking over to a bench and sitting down.

The brunette took a seat next to her and dug into her bags. She pulled out the baseball mitt she had just purchased for Michael. "He is going to ilove/i this, don't ya think?", she asked admiring it in her hands.

Courtney always respected Carly's attitude towards her children and their current situation. It had been almost a year since Sonny had somehow one-upped her in court and was granted full custody of Michael and Morgan. The more Carly started to marvel about the simple gift in her hands, the sadder she seemed.

"You really miss them don't you?" said Courtney but was surprised when Carly's expression went from solemn to annoyed.

"Oh, God, don't start with the loneliness talk!" replied Carly getting up and walking towards the water. "You're lonely, you have no one to hold you, you live by yourself, and I get it Courtney! But what you need to get is how to just deal, alright? You and Jax have been divorced for months. He's out of the country, obviously not losing sleep over you, so I don't understand for the life of me why you are over him. There are plenty of men in this town, eligible men, who would be perfect for you, but no, you just look right past them if they're not Jason, you ex-husband who just so happens to be married and expecting a child! Shit happens, Courtney. You're not the only one crying yourself to sleep at night!"

Carly stopped herself, observing the silence between the two. She turned around and looked at Courtney who was staring at the ground before her, completely speechless.

"I am … so sorry, Courtney," said Carly walking over towards her.

Courtney put her hands up to stop Carly from talking. "No … you're right," she looked at her. "You're absolutely right. I need to stop … wallowing in my self-pity and just grow up. Jax isn't going to come back and neither is Jason. And you what? There are other men out there, I just … I just need to open my eyes more."

Carly smiled. "There you go." Her look of happiness quickly faded and her eyes moved from Courtney to the stairs. Courtney turned around in time to see Sam coming towards them. She groaned and rolled her eyes.

"Hey," Sam said cheerfully. Courtney and Carly just stared. "_Again … when the hell did we become friendly_?", Courtney thought to herself.

She put on a fake smile as Carly just stared. "What are you doing out here by yourself, Sam? I'm sure Jason doesn't want you just out and walking around," said Carly, clearly irritated.

Sam motioned behind her. "No, Max is back there … lurking or something, he's watching me. The last thing I want is Jason nagging about the safety of this baby and me." Her tiny doll-like hands went to her growing stomach and Courtney watched her every move.

"So, you're just walking outside, enjoying lovely Port Charles?" responded Carly rolling her eyes.

"Well, it's sort of nice outside, Jason had business. He's been on the phone all morning, so I decided to just come out, being that its such a nice day and all," replied Sam.

Carly scoffed then smiled sweetly. "Ah, well, don't choke to death on the pollen," she said before picking up her bags and leaving.

"I try not to mind her," laughed Sam lightly. Courtney nodded. "I just focus on my marriage and the baby," continued Sam.

"Yeah …" was all Courtney could say … or would say. Sam finally noticed the rather tired expression on Courtney's face.

"Oh … I'm, I'm sorry," said Sam. "You probably have somewhere you need to be … and I'm keeping you …"

"Yeah, actually … I have somewhere to be," Courtney answered, not able to stop the lie before it had escaped her mouth.

"Oh, okay," replied Sam. "'l'll see you around." And with that said, the petite woman walked off.

Courtney laughed at the conversation; her excuse for getting Sam out of her face. The truth was: she hadn't had a place to go in quite some time –months even. Her days sort of just floated by her, just as life did. At times she felt as if she had nothing to live for. What reason was there to get out of bed? To spend yet another tiresome day completely numb to everything and everyone? She had no husband … no children. No real place to belong. She wanted acceptance. To be able to have something, someone, to look forward to. But that something or someone was non-existent … or out of reach.

She was in the midst of her thoughts when the small object caught her eye. She walked over to it, kneeled down and retrieved it. A wallet. Courtney opened it up. 'Samantha Morgan' read the license. Rolling her eyes, she stood up and proceeded to walk to Harborview Towers to be the Good Samaritan everyone would expect her to be.

_**Harborview Towers**_

The ride up to the penthouse had seemed all too familiar. All the staff was the same, most of the cars in the structure … but times had changed. Feelings and emotions had been ignored, suspended into the air and then eventually forgotten. And Courtney was no longer the same bubbly blonde who giggled while on the back of his bike. Or the same bubbly blonde whose eyes lit up at just the sound of his name.

And that's when she heard his voice. The door of the penthouse was slightly ajar. That old familiar conversation of business and enforcement became clearer as she neared the door. Courtney peeked inside. Jason was standing by the balcony doors with his back turned to her. For a split second, she considered sliding the wallet onto the floor and making a run for it. But a part of her wanted to feel a sense of home for just a moment and for some strange reason –she found it near him.

She took a deep breath then softly knocked on the door. Jason turned around and their eyes shared a glance before he broke the stare. He beckoned for her to come in before letting the person on the other end go.

"Hey," she said in a voice as almost as low as a whisper. She waved the wallet. "Sam dropped this and I was, um … just returning it. Is she here?"

Jason shook his head. "No … I'm the only one here."


	3. Chapter 3

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****Chapter 3**

Courtney took a deep breath then softly knocked on the door. Jason turned around and their eyes shared a glance before he broke the stare. He beckoned for her to come in before letting the person on the other end go.

"Hey," she said in a voice as almost as low as a whisper. She waved the wallet. "Sam dropped this and I was, um … just returning it. Is she here?"

Jason shook his head. "No … I'm the only one here."

"Oh …" was all Courtney could muster up for a response. She looked around the living room. Something about the vibe she received from it didn't match the comfort she found near him. Everything about it, the furniture, pieces she had never seen before, and the little artwork and figures that had been put up since she left –everything reeked of change and transformation ...replacement. It reeked of Sam.

"I see Sam's redecorated," said Courtney not knowing what to do with her one free hand so deciding to rub it through her hair. "Everything looks so different. It's really nice." She bit her tongue at the lie. In all honesty, the room was a complete unmatched and cluttered mess. Not a single object another. Pieces of artwork were hung up in random places. The carpet was clearly cheap and the color was enough to make you run for the hills which could be said for the new couch that had been brought in. She couldn't understand how Jason could come home to this everyday.

"You hate it," remarked Jason with a soft laugh. He knew her so well and seeing that made her heart skip a beat.

She smiled. "Well, it's not my cup of tea but … I'm not your wife so it doesn't really matter." As soon as she said it, she regretted it. And that deafening uneasy silence fell over them. Courtney turned her eyes to the couch and noticed a large, oversized brown teddy bear with a pink ribbon tied around its neck.

Jason caught her eyes staring at the toy. "Sam just bought it for the baby's room."

Courtney blinked back a few tears. She sat Sam's wallet down, then walked over to the toy and picked it up, softly clutching it in her arms. "Um … is the room ready?" Jason nodded. "Do you mind if I see it?" she said not sure what his would be. But he agreed.

When Courtney reached the room, she had to put aside all reservations she had for Sam's skills in interior design –the space looked as if it could have been in some glossy magazine. Cherrywood furniture, porcelain dolls scattered above the tall armoire, a vintage rocking chair, soft pink painted walls, long dramatic lace drapes … it was perfect.

Courtney stood in the center of the room, looking around in complete awe. "It's beautiful, Jason," she said still taking in everything. "Absolutely beautiful …" And that's when her eyes become heavy and burned with tears.

She felt Jason walk over and stand behind her, unsure of what to say or do. She turned around, allowing their eyes to meet. He hesitantly put up a hand to her face then gently wiped her tears.

"Hey, its nothing to cry over," he said in almost a whisper. But she was speechless. She just stared into his eyes, letting her guard down in their familiarity. They began to inch closer to one another but were interrupted at the sound of a door slamming.

"Jason?" yelled Sam from downstairs.

They looked at one another with uneasiness.

"Jason?" Sam called again. "Jason, are you here?"

Hearing that, Jason led the way downstairs. A smile covered Sam's face as she saw her husband. Running up to him, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him but froze when she caught site of Courtney. She looked at Jason then back at Courtney.

"You dropped your wallet on the docks and I was just returning it," said Courtney quickly to reassure Sam that it wasn't what it looked like. "Jason showed me the baby's room and it is just … gorgeous."

Sam nodded, silently setting her fears aside. Jason was her husband now. He was a good man. Faithful, too. She had nothing to worry about. "Thank you," she replied.

Courtney exhaled deeply. "Well," she said grabbing her belongings. "I'm going to head home." She smiled at Sam before taking one last look at Jason then walking out.

Closing the door behind her, Courtney heard the brunette squeal, "Look at what I bought for the baby today!"

And as the elevators doors closed, she could have sworn that she felt her heart breaking.


	4. Chapter 4

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****Chapter 4**

"Jason?" yelled Sam from downstairs.

They looked at one another with uneasiness.

"Jason?" Sam called again. "Jason, are you here?"

Hearing that, Jason led the way downstairs. A smile covered Sam's face as she saw her husband. Running up to him, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him but froze when she caught site of Courtney. She looked at Jason then back at Courtney.

"You dropped your wallet on the docks and I was just returning it," said Courtney quickly to reassure Sam that it wasn't what it looked like. "Jason showed me the baby's room and it is just … gorgeous."

Sam nodded, silently setting her fears aside. Jason was her husband now. He was a good man. Faithful, too. She had nothing to worry about. "Thank you," she replied.

Courtney exhaled deeply. "Well," she said grabbing her belongings. "I'm going to head home." She smiled at Sam before taking one last look at Jason then walking out.

Closing the door behind her, Courtney heard the brunette squeal, "Look at what I bought for the baby today!"

And as the elevators doors closed, she could have sworn that she felt her heart breaking.

_**Courtney's Loft**_

She entered her home and looked around. It was empty as always. And even though Carly had given her the "must not be lonely" lecture, she couldn't help but feel that way.

Everything seemed to remind her of the past. She'd turn her and glanced over everything in her loft. Everything reminded her of Jason. She needed to leave. Get away from anything and everything Jason Morgan. She had to get that man out of her mind.

_**Jake's**_

Courtney had no idea how or why she ended up in that little hole in the wall. Last thing she remembered was sliding into a black low-cut halter and some tight jeans. She ran out to her car and the vehicle just sort of took her there. She drove and drove until she felt like stopping.

When she walked into the small room filled with cigarette smoke and conversation, a few heads turned. Courtney slowly put her head down and walked towards the bar. She sat down hoping no one would talk to her. She just wanted to be mellow for a little while. Get her mind off of Jason and his ever-so-perfect wife.

Coleman walked over and looked at her up and down. "Why the long face, gorgeous?"

Courtney looked up. A sly smile spread on his face. She rolled her eyes. "Just get me a Screwdriver, okay?" she answered. And before he could ask if she was sure, she gave him a look that made him scurry to fill her request.

She placed her elbows on the counter and massaged her temples. _What the hell am I doing here_? she thought to herself. _Jason would kill me if he knew. He'd probably_- STOP IT. Why was Jason constantly on her mind? She was positive she was never on his.

Courtney was so consumed with her thoughts that she didn't notice the large, hairy hand on her thigh. Her eyes met the eyes of a man who looked old enough to be her dad. The smiling man was covered in gray hair, wore a dirty trucker cap and she had to keep herself from gagging as she noticed how blackened the few teeth in his mouth were.

"How's it goin', darlin'?" he asked winking at her.

"Get you hand off of me," she said as she sipped the drink Coleman had just sat down in front of her.

"I'm Clyde Ross," he said ignoring her. "But you can call me Mr. Ross."

She stared at him and started laughing, much to his displeasure. "Are you serious?" she asked still laughing.

"As a heart attack," he answered licking his lips. He rambled on as Courtney continued to drink. He was still talking while Coleman brought her another. He spoke about everything from "getting to know one another better in his newly bought trailer" to "vacationing in sweet ole' Alabama" but in the midst of him rather graphically describing them "rubbing tanning lotion on one another in the hot Arizona sun" Courtney abruptly stopped him.

"Shut up!" she screamed moving on to her, what, 4th, 7th, 10th drink? She stopped count a long time ago. Courtney tucked her hair behind her ear and faced him. "Shut the hell up and get your hand off of me. You're like, what? 100 years old? Listen. I do not want to have sex with you in your trailer nor do I want to travel to oh so interesting Ohio. And as much as Alabama sweetens the pot, I don't want to go there with you either so just leave me alone and go bother some other girl, alright?"

A frown appeared on the man's face and he grasped her wrists. She tried to wriggle out of his clutch but he tightened his grip. "What's your problem?" he asked. "You don't think you're asking for it in something like that?"

She thought about her attire. And maybe she was asking for it. Who was she kidding dressed like this and hanging out at the sleaziest spot in town. "Let me go," she said. Her vision was getting blurry and for a moment she could have sworn the man in front of her was AJ one minute and Sonny the next.

"Let her go," said Coleman interfering. He came out from behind the counter and gently grabbed Courtney.

"Come on, let me help you," he started. She pushed him off of her. "I'm fine!" she yelled.

Courtney stumbled into the middle of the room. "I'm fine! See …" She did a little tap dance. A man laughed in the corner. "Shut up!" she shot back. He shut up.

Coleman turned back to the bar and grabbed the phone. "Yeah … Courtney's down here at Jake's … you need to get her. She's pretty smashed." He hung up and watched the spectacle before him unfold.

"And coming to the stage is Daisy!" she cried. The blonde then had made her way up on top of the pool table. "Whoo, look at me! Queen of the pool table!" She began grinding provocatively against the table which earned her a few cat-calls and hollers. She danced for a little while longer, swinging her hair and laughing.

"D-d-do you like what you see, boys?" she asked slurring her words. The men in the bar continued to cheer her on. As her hands slowly made their way up to the back of her neck to untie her shirt, she felt someone pull her back.

"Get down," the person said. Courtney turned around and came face to face with Carly. She smirked at her best friend.

"And who the hell are you to tell me what do?" Courtney remarked.

Carly's expression turned from annoyed to serious. "Courtney get down before you make an ass of yourself, alright? Let me take you home."

Courtney scoffed and jumped down from the table. "Oh, _please_! You're warning me about making an ass of myself? _You_ warning _me_! How funny is that? You of all people! You're the Queen of making an ass of yourself. Hell, you're the self-pity queen of Port Charles! You … you … hag! You and your stupid plans. You're always … always … whining and-"

Carly cut her off. "Look, you're drunk off your ass so I'm going to let all of that slide." She grabbed Courtney's arm again. "Let's go."

Courtney loosened from Carly's grip and pushed her. "Leave me alone!"

Carly threw her hands up defensively. "Fine. Stay here. Then go in your car, careen off a damn cliff for all I care," she said before turning to walk out.

"Wait!" Courtney screamed. "Where are you going? This … this is the part where you're supposed to drag me out to the car and I'm … I'm, uh, I'm all kicking and screaming. You know? Don't leave me. I was just joking. Really! Ha. Ha. Just kidding."

Carly whirled around, not amused. "Then get your stuff and let's go." And with that she walked out.

"Home sweet home!" Courtney yelled grabbing her and following her friend out. "I'm going to home sweet home!"

_The Next Morning_

"Ouch" whispered Courtney slowly coming out of her sleep. She sat up quickly and winced. "Oh God …"

She looked down at herself. She was still in her clothing from last night. And apparently she had fallen asleep on the floor.

"Morning, sunshine!" Carly yelled in her ear. Courtney jumped. "Thanks," she answered. She looked around. "Why am I on the floor?"

Carly laughed then walked back to the kitchen. "Well, you insisted on showing me your rendition of The Worm and finally you just fell out … literally … on the floor. And you looked so peaceful with your tangled hair and smudged makeup that I didn't want to wake you. Coffee?"

Courtney sighed and slowly got up. She felt like someone had smacked her with a brick. "Why do I get the feeling that I did a lot more than dance last night?"

Carly poured Courtney a mug of coffee and shrugged. "Doesn't matter … you're home sweet home."

"Uh, it does matter. Come on, I don't remember anything from last night," replied Courtney sitting down next to her.

"You went to Jake's, got drunk, I brought you home. More coffee?" said Carly quickly.

Courtney gasped and looked at her friend in disbelief. "I, Courtney Matthews, got drunk? What? I …"

Carly waved her hands. "Don't worry about it. You'll still get into heaven. Not a big deal."

Courtney held her face in her hands. "What was I doing at Jakes? Why on earth-"

"Because of Jason," finished Carly. She turned to face Courtney. "You miss him. I don't know if you went to Jake's to just have a good time or to drink your sorrows away, whatever. But you're still going to come home the same person, Courtney. The same person whose heart breaks every time she even thinks of her ex-husband."

Courtney looked down at the ground. "He doesn't want me Carly …"

Carly frowned. "It's okay …" she began.

"No it's not okay," remarked Courtney. "It is not okay. Why is it alright for Jason to be happy and married to Sam? Why is it alright for Sonny to be married and for his new wife, Reese, to be rocking _your _children to sleep every night and them answering to her as Mother? Why is it alright that I caught Jax in bed with Rachel and he tried to turn everything around and preach to me about the sacraments of marriage and how I should have been devoted to him and been there for him when that's all I did?"

"Well, Courtney, you're right. It's not okay but it's the cards we were dealt with. Circumstances we cannot change. We can't do anything, okay? We can only hope that maybe, I don't know … we both meet someone new and fall in love and live happily ever after and all of that rubbish," said Carly.

"No," Courtney shook her head. "We've found the men we love. We should be with them and we should do whatever it takes."

Carly placed her mug down in frustration. "What are you going to do? Ruin Jason's marriage? Become a home wrecker? Be his mistress?"

"No! Carly …I would never do that. That's terrible. I don't know why I said that …" she sighed rubbing her forehead. "I don't know. I hardly know anything anymore."

"Well, I hate to say it but … it _will_ be okay. It will. Here," Carly moved in and hugged Courtney. "And for the record, I'm not a hag or the self pity queen of Port Charles."

"What?" asked Courtney.

"Oh," said Carly. "Nothing. Nothing at all."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_The Docks_

"I cannot believe this shit!" yelled Carly walking behind Courtney, her eyes searching the ground. "Damn it!"

Courtney rolled her eyes. "It's not that serious, Carly. I'll buy you another one."

"I don't want another one, I want the one I lost!" she screamed, her pitch getting a little higher.

Courtney sighed and turned around to face her best friend. She put her hands on her shoulders. "It's okay. You dropped a cookie. I'll buy you another one, alright?"

"It wasn't just any cookie; it was an oatmeal cookie from that _amazing_ new bakery they just built around the corner. I ordered a dozen and last time I checked, eleven is not a dozen. If I wanted eleven cookies I would have said, 'Excuse Miss Cashier, I want eleven, not twelve, but eleven oatmeal cookies.' I must have dropped one somewhere. Let's go back and get another one."

"Carly!" she winced at the loudness in her voice. She silently reminded herself to never get drunk again. Hangovers were a true bitch. She grabbed Carly's arm and began to lead her towards Kelly's.

"What are you two doing out here by yourselves?" a voice called out behind them.

The women groaned and slowly turned around. Their gazes met the angry one of Sonny's.

He began to walk towards them. "Don't just stand there, you heard me," he remarked.

"Go home Sonny and mind your own business," answered Carly before turning Courtney back around and heading towards the opposite direction.

"No, I think it is my business when the mother of my children and my little sister are out on the docks alone when it's about to get dark out," he shot back.

Carly laughed. "Dark? Oh really? Yes, so dark at 4:15 in the afternoon. I'll be sure to get my flashlight out. Say, why don't you go back home and nag at that pretty little wife of yours? Yeah, sounds like a good idea to me." She tried to turn around but Sonny grabbed her arm. She peered into his eyes and Courtney exhaled deeply behind her. Carly claimed she didn't give a damn about Sonny but something about that man wouldn't allow her to let go. "_Sounds familiar_," she thought to herself.

"Sonny," Courtney interrupted. "We were just going to Kelly's for lunch, alright? No big deal."

"Yeah, it is a big deal," said Sonny. Courtney put her hands up to her face in frustration. "Where's your body guard?" he continued.

"Um, how about we ditched them a long time ago?" replied Carly. "See, you two disowned Courtney, Jason signed the divorced papers and a little while after that, Courtney said adios to Eddie. When I was suddenly told I couldn't see my children, oops, there goes Will. In other words, Courtney and I do not need body guards. We've gone up and down these docks plenty of times and nothing has happened to us. We're leaving. Goodbye." The brunette quickly grabbed Courtney's arm.

Sonny snickered. "Why don't you admit that this is about how things have changed? You can't stand to see me with Reese."

Carly froze. She turned back around. Courtney sighed. They could be out there all day. It was like watching a recess argument. "I could care less about Reese. The only concern I have is for my children."

"_My _children," Sonny corrected.

Carly scoffed. "Oh, you have got to be kidding me. Is that what Reese tells you? Is she your perfect little homemaker? Does she shine your shoes and wash your hair and pick out your clothes in the morning? Well, tell you what, she can call you The Messiah for all I care but one thing is clear: Michael and Morgan do not belong to her and you sure as hell better make that clear to her every time she helps Michael with his homework and whenever she sings Morgan a lullaby."

Sonny shoved his hands in his pockets and looked towards the water. "Reese is my wife now." He turned his eyes toward Courtney. "Just like Sam is Jason's wife."

Courtney narrowed her eyes at him. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Sam's told me that she's seen you and Jason talking every now and then, here and there" Sonny responded.

"Yeah, well Sam needs to mind her own damn business," Carly retorted.

Courtney continued to stare at Sonny. "Jason and I we're … we're barely friends. I mean, it's a small town, people are going to run into one another."

"Yeah but it's just convenient that you and Jason seem to run into one another a lot right?" Sonny asked flippantly.

"Yes, it is," said Courtney. Who was he to be breathing down her neck? "You know what? Jason is married and expecting a child but so what? He's allowed to talk to other women. I've seen him talk to Liz tons of time. I bet Sam doesn't say anything about that. Nothing is happening between us so if Sam is running to you for help, then that's her problem. And frankly, if Sam is so damn paranoid, she needs to go to her husband and not to her ex-married lover."

A look of satisfaction covered Carly's face. She had taught the girl well.

"Well, obviously you don't honor the sacrament of marriage," started Sonny.

Carly let out an obnoxious laugh. "Well if that isn't the pot –no, forget it. No need to say it. Look who I'm talking to, Mr. Husband of the Year." She shook her head. "Come on, Courtney. Let's go." And with that, the two women walked off.

_Front of Kelly's_

"God, I hate him," said Courtney as the reached the front of the diner. "What is his problem?"

"Hm … he's a chauvinist, controlling bastard who doesn't give a damn what anyone else says or thinks. As long as everyone goes by his rules, everything is okay in the world. And unfortunately, I'm not a robot like Reese so I don't lick up his every word," replied Carly.

Courtney let out a small laugh. "I just can't believe his audacity at times. I mean, where does he get off telling me I can't talk to Jason? He implied just that, you know?"

Carly giggled. "Yeah, like we're supposed to be okay with the laughing stock of Port Charles that is Jason and Sam."

Courtney laughed. "So, do we call up Sam and plan a sleepover or something?" she said sarcastically. "Beg her to fill us in on her secret crush? Get matching outfits and fanny packs then go to Sea World?"

The two women's laughter became uncontrollable. "Better yet, let's all build a tree-house. No, since we're so friendly let's give Sam a baby shower!"

"Oh my God, that would be amazing. Thank you!" said Sam who had suddenly appeared. That's when the laughter abruptly stopped.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: **Thank you for all of the reviews. They really inspire me to continue writing:)

**

* * *

****Chapter 6**

It had been two weeks since a naïve Sam had mistaken Carly and Courtney's evil sarcasm for kindness. Neither Courtney nor Carly had it in them to turn Sam away. The nice act was typical of Courtney but made Carly want to gag.

"It can't be too hard," said Courtney as a beaming Sam walked away.

Carly rolled her eyes. "I'd rather strangle myself," she replied.

"Well, how come you didn't say anything while she was standing here?" Courtney questioned. When she saw Carly look away, she said, "Because you feel sorry for her."

Carly shot a look at her. "Oh, no no no. I do not feel sorry for Sam. The only person I feel sorry for is that baby. Having Samantha McCall for a mother? Yes, that child will be in therapy before it grows teeth. I only agreed because of you, who, by the way, is paying for everything."

The two best friends had found themselves in a bind. Maybe it would have been a little easier if Sam had family ("The woman's a damn nomad," noted Carly) or maybe even a few friends ("I hear it's really hard to make friends when you're the town slut," observed, yes, Carly). But Sam had neither. So Courtney and Carly resorted to whatever means necessary: coaxing people into showing up at the small soiree. First, Penny, everyone's favorite Kelly's waitress. She agreed -after Carly promised her $200.00. Hell, even Liz promised to come –only, of course, after Carly threatened to "accidentally" tell Emily that she herself had witnessed Liz and Nikolas share a drunken rendezvous, even though no such thing had happened. And after snooping through GH's files to find a few fellow expecting mothers whom Sam may have come in contact with whenever she had appointments with Dr. Meadows, Carly found two women to show up as well. Courtney even bribed three random women she spotted on the docks with $50.00 to come. Neither Carly nor Courtney one would admit how nervous they were about how the day would turn out but they both knew it would be something to see.

And so the day finally arrived. Courtney, Carly, Emily, Penny, Liz and five random women all sat in Jason and Sam's living room as the expectant mother marveled over her gifts, completely unaware that Courtney and Carly had paid for each and every one of them.

"This is absolutely adorable," said Sam holding up a soft pink baby bag that had a small silver 'M' charm handing from it.

"_Adorable? Baby bags that cost $200 aren't 'adorable', bitch,_" Carly thought to herself. She looked over at Courtney who was clearly thinking that same thing.

"Thank you so much, Liz."

Courtney looked away as Liz locked eyes with her.

"Um, you're welcome!" said Liz gleefully. "Yes, very welcome. I had a ball going to the store and looking at all of the-"

"Uh, why don't you move to your next gift Sam?" interrupted Courtney glaring at Liz. "Here," she picked up a big cream box wrapped in a gold bow. "This is from …" she looked around. She pointed at a young redhead who sat uncomfortably sipping tea. "What's your name again?"

The woman rolled her eyes. "Jessica."

"Oh, that's right, Jessica," noted Courtney. She handed Sam the gift. "This is from Jessica."

Sam smiled before taking the box. She gasped as she picked up the gift. It was a baby carrier.

"_Top of the line,_" Courtney said to herself.

"Wow! Thank you, Jessica," remarked Sam.

The woman smiled. "Oh, really. Not a problem. _Not a problem_, at all if you catch my drift," she responded.

"Okay, Jessica, weren't you saying how you couldn't stay that long because you had to pick your son up from his dad's house?" announced Carly getting up and pulling the woman with her.

"What?" Jessica asked. "I don't have any children."

Carly laughed nervously and pulled the stranger over to the door. "Then I really question your maternal skills!" She opened the door and pushed Jessica out. She looked over at the remaining guests then at Courtney who had her head buried in her hands. Carly let out another laugh. "Whew. That Jessica! I swear she is _such _a joker. She was like that in high school too! Anyone want any more snacks?"

Before any of the ladies could answer, Jason barged through the door. He froze as he noticed all the guests in his home. A nervous smile came to his face.

"Hi …" he said. His cheeks were flushed. Courtney could tell he'd definitely been out around town, more than likely on Sonny's orders. She felt her heart skip a beat.

Courtney watched as Sam got up and ran into Jason's arms. "Look at all of these gifts," she said beckoning at all of the items spread about the room. Jason feigned excitement.

"Wow," he said. Carly snickered and Courtney cleared her throat.

Jason excused himself and walked past his wife and towards the kitchen.

Courtney stood up eyeing Sam's empty mug. "Um, Sam … let me get your another glass of water," she said before quickly exiting the room.

* * *

Jason stood with his back to the door, looking out the window. 

"Hey," she said. She could have sworn she saw him jump at the sound of her voice. He quickly turned around and glanced at her, trying not to notice just how perfectly her satin dress hugged at her curves.

"I do believe your wife is having the best day ever," remarked Courtney, slowly walking over to the refrigerator and retrieving a water-filled pitcher.

"That's good," said Jason clearly uninterested.

Courtney finished pouring then abruptly set the glass down. She inched her way up on top of the counter and sat there staring at her ex-husband. "You don't sound too excited …"

Jason shrugged. "The shower doesn't matter to me. As long as the baby is born healthy, that's the only thing that matters. I don't see the point of a shower anyway –anything the baby needs, I can provide."

"Oh, of course," said Courtney throwing her hands up. "But I don't think that's the only thing bothering you."

Jason looked at her then looked away. "It's just been a long day."

"Is that all?" asked Courtney. She loved how he could never lock eyes with her for more than split second. "You seem a little uneasy … nervous even."

"I'm fine," said Jason, tensing up a little as Courtney slid off the counter and walked towards him.

"You don't seem fine," she said in almost a whisper.

"You know me better than anyone," he responded almost as low as her.

Courtney moved even closer. "You're right. I know when you're not okay … when you're not satisfied," she said staring at his mouth as the words left her own.

Jason reached out and ran his hands down her arms. Courtney shivered at his touch and it secretly amazed him how he still had that effect on her.

"Maybe Sam's reputation is, you know, starting to cloud your vision of her," offered Courtney. "Are you scared she's going to go back to her old ways?"

Jason just stared at her, never releasing the blonde from his clutch.

"What? Do you not trust her, Jason?" Courtney pondered, wanting to see just how far she could go with him. "Or …" she started, moving in even closer. "…do you not trust yourself?"


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: **Once again, thank you so much for the reviews. It's 3:49 in the morning. I should be unconscious right now but I'm clearly not so you here go!

**

* * *

****Chapter 7**

Courtney and Jason stood together in the kitchen of his penthouse. The sounds coming from the living room fell on their deaf ears. They were in their own little world and neither one wanted to step back into reality.

They knew how close they were, how dangerously close they stood but neither Jason nor Courtney tried to distance themselves from one another.

He stroked her arms as she kept her focus on his mouth. Courtney then slowly moved her gaze up to his eyes.

"I don't think you trust yourself, Jason" she said. He didn't respond and in that moment she knew precisely what he was thinking.

"Exactly," she giggled slightly, stepping back and releasing herself from his hold before taking the glass and walking out.

When Courtney entered the living room, the gifts had all been open and the last of the guest were heading out the door. Carly and Emily were cleaning up as Sam sat marveling over all her gifts.

Carly caught sight of Courtney and a sly grin appeared on her face. "Um, Emily, why don't you go home? Courtney and I can take it from here," said Carly.

"Are you sure?" Emily asked. Carly nodded. "Positive. We got it. Thanks for coming."

Emily gathered her belongings and smiled. "Okay, well tell Jason I said 'bye'."

Courtney sat down Sam's glass of water. "Thank you, Courtney," she said taking a sip. "I thought you may have gotten lost in there."

Courtney grinned. "Never …" she responded and tried not to make eye contact with Carly.

Sam then let out a large sigh. "Well … I am tired. Absolutely beat. I think I'm going to go upstairs and take a nap. You two don't mind cleaning up do you?"

Carly cut her eyes at her then put on a large smile. "Oh, of course not! I mean, after all, we did plan the shower, throw the shower, why not clean up the shower as you rest your head?"

Courtney rolled her eyes as Sam didn't catch on. "Thank you so much. I had such an amazing day. You two are great," the brunette answered. She picked up her glass and then walked upstairs.

"_Oh, you two are great_", mimicked Carly. She snatched up a plate and threw it into the large trash bag she was holding. "_Thank you so much_. Bite me. I hope you spit in her drink!"

"Carly!" said Courtney getting up and beginning to organize the gifts. "Jason is in the other room!"

Carly gasped. "Oh! That's right. Jason _is _in the other room. And so were you for, like, ever. Engaging in a little kitchen floor loving, perhaps?"

"Would you stop it!" Courtney whispered grabbing Carly's arm. "What part of 'Jason is in the other room' do you not understand?"

"I'm just trying to figure out what happened ..."

"Nothing happened. I got Sam a glass of water and Jason and I talked. We caught up for a little while. That's it," answered Courtney.

"Oh yeah, I'm sure you caught up alright," teased Carly. She looked past Courtney. "Speak of the devil."

Courtney turned around and smiled uncomfortably as Jason entered the living room.

"Hey, Jase, how's it going?" asked Carly. Courtney bit her lip then deciding she looked a tad too sexual doing so, she began to fidget with her nails. She had no idea who that forceful, feisty woman in the kitchen was.

Jason nodded, acknowledging Carly.

"You know what?" Carly said. She looked around. "I think I'm done here. Courtney, I'm sure you can handle the rest of this. I'm going to go across the hall and see if I can get pass The Reese and see my sons."

"Wha-"

"See ya!" said Carly waving goodbye. Courtney sighed taking the trash bag and looking around at all the clutter.

"I don't suppose you want to help …" remarked Courtney. Jason looked hesitant. She laughed. "I won't bite, I swear." She flashed a small grin then handed him on a garbage bag.

They engaged in small talk for a few minutes, catching glances from one another every now and then. For the most part, they seemed okay with the friendly banter between them. But deep down they knew it was a front –it just was just a matter of someone breaking their shell.

"Sam was very pleased with today," Courtney said softly. It seemed as if Jason could care less but there was something about the silence between them …

"Thank you for putting this together for her," said Jason sitting down. "I know you don't really like her."

"_Who does?_" Courtney thought to herself. "Oh, I have no real problem with her. She's … nice," she said. Courtney then caught sight of the skeptical look on Jason's face and both began laughing.

She then stood up and made her way behind the couch and continued to pick up bits and pieces of debris but stopped when she came to the pool table.

"I sure you don't have much time for your favorite hobby anymore," she said running her hands slowly across the felt. Courtney noticed Jason's eyes watching her movements. She knelt to pick up a stick and positioned herself against the table.

Jason abruptly got up. It was almost like a reflex whenever someone went near his pool table.

"Don't scratch that up like you used to," he said half jokingly.

Courtney scoffed and then put her one free hand on her hip. "I haven't touched this thing in ages!" she protested. "And every time you tried to teach me we ended up using this for something other than pool, remember?."

Did he? She saw Jason tense up. She laughed to herself then sauntered over to the opposite side. "Besides," she lowered herself to the table. "This would be scratching it up," and with that she scraped the bottom end of the stick against the green felt.

Jason put his hand to his heart in fake pain. "What are you doing?" he cried.

Courtney just giggled. "I'm scratching your table," she answered then proceeded to do it again.

"Alright, alright," said Jason. He went to grab the pool stick from Courtney who playfully fought him off. He finally got hold of it when both realized how close they were standing yet again.

This time Jason was the one who kept his focus on Courtney's mouth. It was as if it could offer an answer as to why he was feeling such a need for her when he already had someone to call his own. He had a wife. A beautiful wife who was expecting their first child. What was so hard about understanding that and accepting it?

He felt himself move closer as Courtney leaned in as well. The lips grazed against the others as Courtney stared into his eyes. "I'll see you around," she whispered before turning into the other direction.

She grabbed her purse and coat and walked out of the door without even taking a glance back.

Jason rubbed his hand over his face and threw the stick across the room. Something … something he couldn't quite put his finger on was brewing and he wasn't sure if he could, or even wanted to handle it.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: **Okay, here it is. I tried to make it sorta long to make up for the fact that I haven't update in a while. I hope you enjoy! Oh, and be it known, the Carly in my story is Tamara's Carly. I don't mind Jennifer but no onecompares to The Divine Miss Braun ;)

**

* * *

****Chapter 8**

Jason was sitting, staring blankly into space trying to collect his thoughts when his expectant wife scurried down the stairs and slowly snaked her arms around his neck from behind the couch. He reached up to her as she laid a kiss on the side of his cheek.

The petite brunette then walked around to the front of the couch and sat on her husband's lap, smiling as he wrapped his arms securely around her.

"How was your day?" he asked closing his eyes.

"It was wonderful," she squealed, bringing her husband's arms tighter around her. "I mean, I never _ever _thought I'd have a baby shower. I don't exactly have many friends in this town but I got a baby shower. A _great _baby shower. I got so many gifts! I swear this little one is so set. We don't have to buy a thing! I still can't believe Carly and Courtney did all of this for me. Especially Carly … I don't know, maybe Courtney talked her into it or something. Courtney's a really great person, don't you think?"

Jason didn't respond.

"Jason … Jason?" Sam asked turning around and faced her husband. "What are you thinking about?"

* * *

Courtney opened the doors of her loft to see Carly at her kitchen counter with a cup of tea in one hand and a magazine in the other.

"Um … hi," she said watching her friend. Carly waved, never taking her eyes off of the page in front of her. "May I … ask what you're doing here?"

"Oh, after I got finish convincing Reese to let me see my children, I got a little bored so I just got the duplicate key above your door and let myself in."

Courtney rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips. "Come on, Carly. You expect me to believe that you just suddenly got bored and decided to come visit?"

Carly smiled sheepishly and raised her mug to Courtney. "Tea?"

"You just want to hear about Jason and me in the kitchen …"

"Jackpot!" Carly jumped down from her chair and ran over to the blonde. She grabbed Courtney's shoulders. "I want every single detail."

"That's just it Carly, there _are _no details," Courtney replied sitting down on the couch. "Like I said earlier we just … talked."

Carly smirked. "No _you_ expect me to believe that?" Courtney sighed. "You two were in that kitchen forever and a day. You were_ not_ just talking."

Courtney shifted on the piece of furniture and looked at Carly. "Listen to me, alright? Believe it or not, it's normal for people to just talk without having sex. You know, two people … conversation … nothing physical … are we getting this?"

Her explanation earned a scoff from Carly. "Its true!" she cried, trying to defend herself.

"Oh, you are so full of it!" replied Carly.

"Fine. Don't believe me. I know what happened in that kitchen. I was there; you weren't so you can take your accusation and shove it, alright?"

The two women stared at one another for a few seconds then the burst into a fit of giggles.

"Oh, honey, you suck at being mean!" said Carly.

Courtney laughed. "I know. But that's just it, you know? I'm not a mean person. I'm not some horrible person so I could never do that to Sam. I … I may flirt with Jason but that's only in good fun …"

"But does he know that?" Carly questioned.

"Yeah, I mean … he should. Come on, Carly. Jason is honest and loyal and all of that other good stuff. He made vows to Sam in a church before God. He's not going to break them. And they have a child on the way! I don't know, its just fun seeing him … uncomfortable, I guess. _But_, I have absolutely no interest in him. Courtney Matthews, a home wrecker? No. It's not me at all … and it never will be."

* * *

"Uh, yeah … yeah, Courtney is … a good person," answered Jason. He opened his eyes, trying to shake the image of his ex-wife that danced around in his head. "But that doesn't matter …"

Sam smiled and widened her dark eyes. "Oh, yeah. That's right … because _I'm _Mrs. Morgan." She leaned in and placed a kiss on his lips. "The _only _Mrs. Morgan." She kissed him again. "You know," she placed her hand on my growing stomach. "I cannot wait until this little girl is born. And more than anything, I can't wait until I see the look on your face when you hold her for the first time. Jason, that is going to be the happiest moment of my life."

"Same for me," he replied. "But it's going to be more than just a moment. It'll make everything perfect."

"Oh really?" she smirked. "Yes, that moment in the hospital is wonderful but when you get home, it's a different story. I mean, when you have to wake up at three in the morning to-"

"Wait a second," said Jason cutting her off. "What's this 'you' business?"

Sam let out a laugh. "You don't expect me to get up at crazy hours, do you? I'm carrying this thing around for nine months, the _least _you can do is make a bottle."

"Don't worry, I'll do whatever you need me to," said Jason. "You know, Sonny's really about being the baby's Godfather."

Sam shifted. "Who said anything about Sonny?"

* * *

"Sonny is very … I don't even know how to describe him," said Carly. "There are so many words that can define him and his behavior. I mean, I know that … hole inside of him isn't his fault and I know that he hates that its there and that he can't help it but … some things that he does just throws me, you know? He's done a lot of things to me but when he brought Sam into our home … into our bed it just … it broke my heart because I saw what it did to our family."

Courtney looked at the brunette solemnly as she sighed into her cup of tea. "Well, I'm sure Sonny regrets it.:

Carly waved off the statement. "No. Not at all. He'll only admit he was sorry for hurting the boys."

"Come on, Carly, you know that isn't true-"

"No it is very true," remarked Carly. "To him, I screwed up because I slept with Lorenzo. His enemy. Sonny doesn't see two sides to a story, only his. You can't get a word in with him. And Sam? Well, she claims to be happy with Jason and she's always got that stupid smile on her face but I know she still feels for Sonny. I see it. Sam adored Sonny. He made her fall in love with her. She didn't have a choice after the diamond bracelets and trips to places she'd only seen in commercials."

Courtney looked down. "I can't imagine being in your position … especially during that whole ordeal. I mean, I saw how you were being torn down but trying so hard to stay strong. I mean, Jax cheated on me but he didn't flaunt his mistress in my face. Hell, I don't even know who the woman was but you … you had to see Sam everyday. Practically everywhere you went, she was there."

Carly nodded in agreement. "Yes she was … and she had absolutely no shame. I will never understand her audacity. It's already bad enough you're sleeping with a married man but a married man with children? I just … whatever, it's not for me to understand, I guess. You know, sometimes, I think about how things would be if I had stayed with Lorenzo. It sort of brings a smile to my face. But then reality sets in. And in the real world, I know that he's married. He and Skye have been together for a while now and those two children of theirs are just … he's really happy and I'm happy for him. But it's okay to sort of let your mind think about what could have been."

Courtney shook her head. She knew more than desired how it felt to get lost in her thoughts. Sonny had cheated on Carly. Jax had cheated on her. What was it with the men they had chosen? And why they hell did they let the good ones get away?

Carly then exhaled deeply. "Well, I really need to get home. I'm supposed to be meeting my mother for dinner." She rose from her seat and grabbed her coat as Courtney followed her to the door where they embraced each other.

"Well, I'll call you, alright?" Courtney said breaking the hug. She watched as Carly wiped her eyes. "Hey, are you okay?"

Carly put a slight smile on her face. "Yeah, I'm, um … I'll be fine. I'll see you, okay?"

Courtney shut the door then leaned against it and shut her eyes as the conversation she just had with Carly replayed itself in her mind.

* * *

"I thought we agreed that Sonny and Carly would be the Godparents," said Jason.

Sam looked at Jason in disbelief then got up and in stood in front of her husband. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"We didn't agree on anything," she said sternly. "You _suggested _that Sonny and Carly become the Godparents but we hadn't decided on anything yet."

"What's wrong with Sonny and Carly being the Godparents?" replied Jason standing up.

"What's wrong is that you're making decisions without me. And what would I look asking Sonny of all people to be the Godfather of my child?"

"I already talked to him about it, you don't have to ask him anything," Jason remarked.

Sam put her hands to her face. "That's not the point. The point is that nothing was clarified with me. Deciding a baby's Godparents is a really big decision. Godparents have a huge responsibility. Sonny and Carly? Come on, Carly hates me. The last thing on her mind is having a commitment to a child being carried by her ex-husband's ex-mistress!" noted Sam.

Jason shrugged. "It's not that big of a deal. Sonny is okay with it, I'm sure Carly will be too …"

"That's not the point!" declared Sam. "The point is that you went behind my back - "

"You're making this into something isn't," Jason shot back. "Who else-" his voice trailed off at the sound of his cell ringing.

Sam let out a dramatic sigh then tapped her bare foot against the floor. Jason let it ring a few times before Sam responded, "Just answer it! I know you want to."

Jason rubbed his face in frustration and opened up the phone. "Yeah?"

"I need to see you. Can we meet on the docks in a few minutes?" the voice on the other end answered.

Jason then glanced over at Sam who stood staring at her feet. She tossed her head to the side then stared at him, a look of annoyance on her face.

Why the hell was she so easily irritated? And he'd be damned if she blamed it on those stupid hormones again. Everything he had given her –jewelry, designer clothing, this penthouse and that expensive ass beach-house in Florida that he didn't even want but purchased anyway because she "absolutely adored it". How dare she not give him this one thing.

He gritted his teeth and said into the phone, never taking his eyes off of his wife: "Yeah. I'll be there" then hung up.

"Have fun," Sam said before charging upstairs.

Jason surprised himself by not running after her. Instead, he simply left.

* * *

"Hey" Jason said approaching the woman who abruptly spun around at the sound of his voice.

Courtney flashed him a smile and motioned over to the bench. "Let's sit down," she said.

Jason followed behind her and noticed how awkward her movements were. She'd tucked her hair behind her ear or she'd crossed her legs continuously or she'd clear her throat. He found comfort in the fact that he knew her so well.

"Listen, Jason, I asked you to meet me here because I need to talk to you," Courtney began as she found herself thoughtlessly inching closer to him. Their hands softly grazed one another's and before she could apologize for her actions earlier that day Courtney and Jason kissed for the first time in what seemed like forever.

Neither one was sure who initiated the kiss and neither one really cared. The fact was that it happened –and God help the both of them.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: So, here you go, Nicole. YOU GOT YOUR UPDATE! Happy? Huh? Huh? J/K. Anyways, thank you to those who have reviewed. However, if this chapter sucks, keep in mind that its three something in the morning!**

* * *

**Chapter 9**

As soon as their lips touched, Courtney jerked back. She gripped Jason's arms and stared at his lips, unable to make eye contact with him. Instead, she shut her eyes –and kissed him back. But as Jason raised his hands to cup her face and deepened the kiss, Courtney pulled back again.

She stood up and rubbed her forehead. Jason opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"What … what are we doing?" she asked breathlessly. "This isn't right."

Jason got up from the bench and reached out to her but she stepped back.

Courtney pointed up towards the stairs. "Go home, Jason." He looked at her, just as confused as she was.

"Go home, Jason" she said again. "Go home to your wife. Get into bed with her. Hold her. Tell her how much you love her."

"Courtney, just listen," he began.

"No!" she said. "It … it was a mistake calling you. It was a mistake throwing Sam's shower. A mistake in the kitchen. Everything. Just … go back and be with your wife."

And with that, Courtney turned on her heels and ran off.

* * *

_A few hours later …_

Courtney stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. The lighting was rather dim but she could still see her reflection rather clearly. She snickered at her tangled hair and the smeared make-up she had been too tired to scrub off but her giggles came to a halt as she caught sight of her flushed lips. She put a manicured finger to them and sighed.

"_How could you," _she whispered. How could she allow herself to give into him –again?

The shrill of her ringing phone made her jump. She groaned and glanced at the clock. Who could be calling at 3:47 in the morning? Definitely not Mike. Or her mother. Carly knew better. Who else could it- her eyes lightened up at the mere thought. Courtney ran over to the phone.

"Jason!" she asked into the receiver.

"You never cease to amaze me," spoke the voice on the other end.

Courtney picked up the phone and walked over to her bed. She sat down as she replied, "What do you want, Jax?"

"I see some things never change," he replied. She heard him laugh and immediately felt sick to her stomach remembering how she had trained herself to love this man. They hadn't spoken since that day in court she had acquired nearly all of his assets.

"What do you want?" Courtney repeated.

"I can't call to check up on my wife?" Jax questioned.

"Your ex-wife," she quickly corrected. Courtney climbed beneath the covers and shut her eyes. For some reason, she knew it was going to be a long night.

"So, you thought Jason was calling …" Jax began.

Courtney sighed. She continued to let him drone on realizing how much he loved the sound of his own voice.

"Why doesn't that surprise me? You always have been crazy about him. But, wait a minute … he's married to Sam!" Jax laughed again.

"Yes, he is married. Married. Marriage. Vows. Sacraments. Wow, something you wouldn't have a clue about," Courtney retorted fidgeting with her nails.

"You're the one that divorced me, Gorgeous."

"Oh, I must didn't hear that vow about me accepting your tramp in my bed," Courtney shot back rubbing her temples. "Are you done because I'm rather, oh, I don't know … bored." She rolled her eyes as she heard a female voice in the background asking him who he was talking to.

Ignoring the woman, Jax turned his focus on Jason again. "Are you expecting his phone call? Or maybe a late night visit."

"No … no, see Jason isn't like you. He realizes that he has a wife so he doesn't need to have another woman on the side. That's a lot more than you can say, am I right?"

"Yeah, you probably are right but oh, how the mighty have fallen, Courtney. You divorce me, you get the upper-hand in court but, yet, you're still alone. I can see if you were happily involved with someone with children pulling at your skirt but you don't have any of that."

"Go to hell, Jax" she whispered biting her lip. She refused to shed a tear over this man. God knows she had done so plenty of times before.

"I'll be waiting for you and Jason there," he answered before hanging up.

Courtney pushed the 'off' button before flinging the phone across the room. It hit her dresser, sending a crystal figurine of an angel Carly had bought her one Christmas to the floor and shattering into a million pieces.

"Like my guardian angel was ever on her job, anyway," she said to herself.

Slowly, she began to make her way out of bed to retrieve a broom and dustpan when the phone began to ring again. Courtney decided to ignore it as she swept up the mess she had made.

The caller allowed it to ring until the voicemail answered to which they left no message. Realizing she had a meeting at 8 in the morning to develop new plans for her foundation, she placed the phone back on its receiver as she slipped underneath the cashmere covers hoping to fall asleep rather quickly –and easily. However, her wishes were useless as her phone rang again.

She hesitated to pick it up. But seeing that the caller had no intention of hanging up, she answered.

"Hello?" Courtney answered groggily. Something inside her perked up as she heard the voice on the other end.

"Hey …" they responded.

Still a bit in disbelief, she replied: "Jason?"


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**A/N: **John Mayer's "Your Body Is A Wonderland" came up on my iPod Shuffle and I took it as a sign. UPDATE! Gotta love those signs. So, here we are, the big 1-0. FINALLY! It's a long one. Well, it looked longin Microsoft Word. Anyways,in this chapter, I wanted to really go deeper into Jason and Sam's marriage sort of from his POV. With that said, ahem, now for a **Shameless Pimping Moment** (Pruza does it w/Sam so why can't I?): if you EVER get bored, go read "Collide" by the always fabulous Nicole a.k.a EvenAngelsFall22. It's like … wow. Ha. And I'm officially rambling. Yes, onto the update …

* * *

Courtney clutched the phone closer to her ear and sat up in bed. She looked over at the clock. 5:03 in the morning –she definitely wasn't going to get any sleep.

"Jason?" she repeated into the phone.

She heard him exhale deeply. "I called to -"

"You called about what happened on the docks, right?" Courtney interrupted. She slid deeper into her covers.

No response on his end.

"It's okay … people just get caught up in the moment. You and I know that better than anyone, don't we?"

She wondered to herself about his reaction to that comment when he still didn't respond.

"Though I don't appreciate being your fallback girl when you and Sam get into an argument or something …"

"And I'm sorry about that," Jason replied. "But, wait, how did you know Sam and I got into a fight?"

"Oh, come on, Jason. I know you. We were married. I'm sure you remember that, don't you? Besides, the look on your face when you came down the stairs showed everything. So … what personality did Sam unleash tonight?"

Jason laughed and Courtney found herself extremely pleased. "Don't talk about my wife," he joked.

"So who was it? Susan, Sally, Sadie or was it Serena this time?" Courtney giggled. "But, seriously, what happened. I mean, if you want to talk about it."

"Uh … Sam just doesn't agree with Sonny and Carly being the godparents," Jason slowly admitted.

"I see," replied Courtney, desperately trying to find the right words to say. She wanted to provide an answer for Jason, something to help his situation. She sure as hell didn't want him upset over the likes of _Sam_.

Ever the do-gooder, she offered: "Well, maybe you and Sam can compromise. How about you pick the Godparents and she picks the baby's name? Both decisions are vital and lasting. Do you think she'll agree to that?"

"I don't know," said Jason genuinely unsure. Sam was a complicated woman with way too many layers for him to figure out. Not that he cared to anyway. He could give Sam the world and she'd still find something to gripe about. _The stars aren't bright enough. The moon isn't how I expected it to be. _She was never fully satisfied. At first, he sort of loved that about her. It showed that she was a perfectionist, never completely fulfilled until things were beyond exceptional. Now? Hormones or not, it was just damn annoying.

"Well, she'd be crazy if she'd refuse," said Courtney. "I'm sure you went against your better judgment and gave her a child. What more could she want?"

Jason was amazed at how well Courtney knew him. She was right, yet again. Sam was ready for children and he wasn't. Every time he had given Sam a reason for not wanting children ("It's not safe to have a child right now. Business isn't right"), she shot back with some reason that she had stirred up in that mind of hers ("Do you just not want a child with me? Is that it?"). But when Sam decided to leave for a little while to "clear her head" and retreat to Florida for a few weeks, he realized just how important she was to him. He genuinely missed her. Sure she couldn't even fry a piece of bacon. And so what if whenever she did laundry, he ended up with pink socks and underwear? He loved her and decided that if what she wanted was a baby, well, then, she was going to have a baby.

Soon enough, Dr. Meadows was congratulating them on their new addition to the household. And while Jason was wary and on-edge most of the time over trying to handle his work and protecting, not just his wife, but his unborn child, Sam's elated expression whenever she talked about the baby was enough to calm him. Eventually, he settled into the idea of fatherhood.

"So … Jax called me a little while ago," said Courtney, somewhat taken aback at how open she was being with him over the phone. After she married Jax, she hardly talked to Jason. Jax didn't like it and, sadly, his wish was her command. Jax hated when she even uttered the word Jason. If she even tried to call her ex-husband she never would have heard the end of it. "Yeah, being typical Jax."

"Well, I could have told you that," responded Jason, letting out a small laugh.

"Watch it, now. You're lucky he and I are no longer married," she shot back playfully.

"What were you thinking?" asked Jason still laughing.

In all honestly, she had no clue. Jax measured up to be a wonderful man –on paper anyway. He talked a good deal. Definitely a charmer. He was business smart. Lord knows the man had a knack for how to triple his financial assets. What else? Oh, and he gave Courtney _whatever the hell_ she wanted. Not that she exactly begged for a mink coat or a villa in Spain or even to be flown to London one night for dinner when she complained that there was nothing in the fridge. It was just the way it was back then. She participated in that farce of a fairy-tale Jax called a life until that night he confessed everything about his affair. Ignoring the warning signs for way too long, and after much pressure from Carly, she confronted him –and he came clean. On a spontaneous whim, he had taken another woman to bed while out of town. No, it didn't occur in a hotel, but in one of their beds. Yes, he regretted it and he was sorry. No, he didn't want a divorce but to try and get over his mistake. But Courtney was out the door before he could finish explaining himself. She left their Manhattan penthouse and drove upstate to Carly's apartment. The next day, she instructed Anita, their housekeeper, to pack her belongings while Jax was attending a meeting and have them ready for her. She'd never forget Carly insisting on driving back with her –with a baseball bat in the trunk, "just in case he tries to bring the bitch back home with him." A few months later, she officially filed for divorce –and never felt so alone in her life.

"Well, we all make mistakes," she said solemnly. "People tell us things and we may not necessarily listen or take them up upon their advice but that's okay sometimes. You learn from experience, you know? And it's fine to choose the wrong above right sometimes."

She immediately regretted the last statement completely aware of its back-handed meaning. It could easy define a few things –her marriage to Jax, maybe even her marriage to Jason … the kiss on the docks. And she definitely didn't want him to think that what happened on the docks earlier was okay. But she was surprised when he agreed with a simple "yeah."

"Um, well, I'm going to go asleep now," Courtney announced suddenly feeling uneasy. "I have a meeting in a few hours."

"Oh, okay," said Jason. Courtney swore she could hear a hint of disappointment in his voice but immediately banished the suggestion from her thoughts. She knew Jason pretty well but she was positive she was being bias and those old feelings, which really shouldn't be occurring, were just clouding her judgment.

"Yeah. So I'll talk, I mean, see you later, alright? Bye Jason."

"Bye, Courtney," and with that, both hung up.

"_Carly would be oh so proud"_, Courtney thought to herself before drifting into a rather satisfying slumber.

* * *

"You and Jason talked all night!" cried Carly loud enough for a few customers to turn and look at her.

The two women sat inside Metro Court, which Courtney owned now. Carly called her after the meeting and asked her to meet up for breakfast.

Courtney nearly spit out her Mimosa. Liquor before lunch time. Yeah, Jax definitely had a lasting influence on her.

"Can you get any louder?" she asked. Her eyes scanned the place, making sure no one with any connection to Jason or Sam was present.

"But this is huge! Progress, my dear, progress," said Carly pouring an obnoxious amount of maple syrup on her stack of four pancakes. The brunette then looked at her food satisfactorily then poured some over her eggs … then her hash browns … then her pastry. "What?" she asked, catching Courtney staring at her with a look of disgust on her face.

Courtney rolled her eyes as she watched Carly carefully cut her food into triangles and rectangles.

Shaking her head, she responded: "Nothing. Anyways, what do you mean, 'progress'? What 'progress'? Jason and I just talked. That's all. Nothing more."

Carly shook her fork at Courtney. "See? That right there. The talking. First you two are going to have those late night chats and then he's going to come over and oops, you two accidentally kiss and, wow, is that your shirt being thrown across the room and-"

"Stop!"

"Suddenly his jeans are off and everything is all hot and steamy and the people next door are complaining about the noise from the headboard slamming against the wall," Carly continued. She giggled then began laughing hysterically when she caught the serious look on Courtney's face.

"That is not funny," said Courtney throwing a slice of cantaloupe at her friend. "It's not like that. Obviously, something was bothering him. He and Sam got into some stupid little argument and we just talked about it. No big deal."

"What was the argument about?" asked Carly with authentic curiosity.

"Oh, nothing," replied Courtney remembering exactly what the odd couple was fighting over.

"Something petty, I could imagine," Carly remarked. "I bet she just picks fights with him for no reason, you know? And of course he just deals with it. I don't understand how, or why, he puts up with it."

"…He loves her," was all Courtney could offer. And she knew how right she was. Whether Jason was your best friend, or your lover, he was loyal. It was a term that defined him completely –and she absolutely adored that about him. She could only hope that Sam appreciated that quality as well.

"Yeah, sure he does," replied Carly sarcastically. Her dark brown eyes gravitated towards Courtney's suit.

"Did you get that outfit when you were married to Jax?" Carly questioned.

Courtney looked down at her tweed suit and smoothed a hand over it fondly. She smiled thinking of how much Jax hated it. He always complained that the jacket, which she never placed over a camisole, was too low cut –something she always disagreed with. And the mini skirt didn't exactly help his insecurity over men constantly staring at his wife. "I did actually," she said proudly.

"Noticeable …"

"It's Chanel," said Courtney.

"It's ugly," laughed Carly.

Courtney scoffed. "This suit was very expensive. It was almost $5,000. What's wrong with it?"

"Nothing … if you're getting ready to go visit the kiddies at boarding school," answered Carly trying to keep a straight face. Before Courtney could speak she said, "Well, I gotta leave. I'm meeting up with a real estate agent. He's going to drive me around to a few places."

Courtney suddenly remembered that Carly was looking for a new place to leave. She felt she needed something smaller, more "cozier". In other words, she just wanted to use her new place as an excuse to spend tons of money on decorating.

"Oh God," she heard Carly groaned as she gathered her belongings. Courtney followed her gaze to the entrance just as Sam came waddling down the stairs. "That's my cue."

Sam smiled at Carly, who didn't even acknowledge her whatsoever.

"Anyone sitting here?" she asked cheerfully.

_Unfortunately, no. _"Nope, no one at all," Courtney answered.

"Care if I join you?"

_I do, actually. _"Sure!" said Courtney flashing a bright smile. "You look very pretty today." She eyed Sam's attire: a pale yellow sleeveless wrap dress. _Thank God someone told her about those strapless smocks._

"Thank you," said Sam. "Actually, I'm happy I found you here. I was going to call you about something."

Courtney felt a lump form in her throat. She looked down at her food. "Oh?"

"Yes," continued Sam. "I haven't had the chance to thank you for the shower. I'm sending Carly some flowers but I wanted to invite you over to dinner."


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**A/N: **Surprised at how quickly I updated? Blame f'in wireless internet. A bitch for me, good for you, I guess. Enjoy.

* * *

A smile spread across Sam's face as she repeated her offer again.

"I wanted to invite you to dinner." She sat patiently waiting for Courtney's response.

"I … you don't have to invite me to dinner, Sam," Courtney said fidgeting with her napkin. "I had no problem giving the shower, really. Neither did Carly." She bit her tongue after the last remark.

"Oh, but I want to!" Sam responded. "I know that it took a lot of time and money to throw the shower."

"_You don't know the half of it_," Courtney wanted to scream but decided against it, smiling from ear to ear instead.

"It's the only way I can think of to really thank you," Sam continued. She put her hand over Courtney's sincerely. "I would really like it if you agreed to it."

Courtney looked down at Sam's small hand. Her eyes focused on the diamond ring that protruded on the brunette's slender wedding finger. It was a three-stone ring of emerald cut diamonds with a thin, platinum band. She decided it was rather obnoxious for someone so petite.

Before she could protest, Sam continued: "I'm not that great of a cook but I have been taking a few lessons. It sort of keeps me busy. Anyways, Jason doesn't complain. He really likes my shrimp alfredo."

_Jason's a man. He'll eat anything. _"Sam, as wonderful as that sounds, you really don't have to. If you really want to thank me … let Jason have his way and allow Sonny and Carly to be the Godparents of your little girl." The words were out before she could stop them.

Sam uneasily sat back. A look of curiosity made its way to her face. "How did you know about that?" she asked.

Courtney broke eye contact with Sam. She pretended to examine her manicure. "Um … Jason mentioned it on the phone." She bit her tongue again. "_Nice, Courtney_" she thought.

"You and Jason talk on the phone?"

Courtney waved off the question. "We've talked … _talked. _I mean, we don't sit up and call one another or anything. We've … we've just had a few conversations but not on the phone …"

"You just said Jason mentioned it on the phone …"

"And he did but it's not like he calls me every night, I mean, day. I actually called him. I lost a watch and I thought I may have left it over there from when I was at the shower. That's all. Yeah, so when I called him, he said he hadn't seen my watch but would keep an eye out for it. And from there, we just had, you know, a small, very short, casual conversation. He just mentioned it, you know, wanted to get my opinion on it, I guess," replied Courtney. She noticed her hands shaking slightly and quickly placed them on her lap.

"Well, of course you would agree with it. Sonny is your brother and Carly is your best friend, what isn't there to disagree with?" Sam responded. She placed a hand up to her forehead. "I'm sorry. That was rude. I didn't mean it like that. It's just my …"

"Hormones," the two women said simultaneously. Courtney rolled her eyes.

"Anyways, I'm just not comfortable with it and Jason needs to realize that. I don't see what's so hard about comprehending the fact that this isn't just _his _child. This kid belongs to me too. And the sooner he gets that through his head, the happier we'll all be," Sam said, sighing loudly.

Courtney looked at her in disbelief. She wanted to laugh out loud at Sam's argument. _I don't see what's so hard about comprehending the fact that this just isn't his child. _Where did she learn such words?

"Well, Sam, marriage is about compromise. You're not just about yourself anymore. You're sharing your life and everything that entails with someone else. You and Jason took vows before one another and agreed to that. And this baby that you two have created doesn't just have _one _parent. Did it take just one of you to make it? No. It took the both of you, maybe that's what _you _need to realize."

Sam was quiet for a moment, clearly taken aback by Courtney's answer. She ran her fingers through her hair and closed her eyes.

"Sometimes I wish I never …" her eyes opened and locked with Courtney's as her voice trailed off. "Nothing. I'll, um … I'll take your advice. But really, it isn't my decision or even Jason's especially the Carly factor. I'm sure Sonny is excited but Carly …"

"Carly will be happy too," Courtney lied. "It's not like Jason is asking her to be _your _Godparent."

Sam laughed. "True. So, back to my original proposition –will you be joining Jason and me for dinner?"

Courtney exhaled. "Sam … I'm really not trying to be rude or standoffish but … I'd rather not. I mean, the Godparent thing would be a big enough thank you - "

"And I said I would talk to Jason on that but that isn't enough for me. Please Courtney. You honestly have no idea how much that shower meant to me. Please …"

"I … I'll only come … if you invite Carly, too" said Courtney.

* * *

"Absolutely not!" cried Carly over the phone. Courtney laid back into her plush couch and threw her feet on the coffee table.

"I told her I would come if you were invited to."

"Well, I guess you'll be free Friday night," retorted Carly. "No way in hell."

Courtney sighed. "It won't be that bad, I swear."

"And how do you know that?" Carly questioned. Courtney heard a loud car horn. "Move, dammit!" she heard Carly scream. "Sorry, Court, people drive like they've never seen rain before! What were we talking about? Oh yeah, Sam. _Hell no_ to that!"

"Since when does Carly Corinthos drive?" laughed Courtney.

"Since Carly Corinthos bought a brand new car. Alimony is such a beautiful thing. And, oh, don't ever call me by my full name, reminds me of that … creature-thing I married."

"Why are you driving? Wait, a minute! You've never even owned a car. Hell, your license expired years ago," Courtney replied.

"A girl can change can't she? And your information, I got my license renewed and I'm-"

Courtney cut her off. "Hold on, someone is on my other line." She clicked over.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Courtney, it's Sam."

_Damn. _"Hi, Sam," she answered.

"So, is Carly coming?"

"Uh … she is, actually. She said she would," lied Courtney. How many times could she mislead this woman? But, somehow, she would find a way to get Carly over to the Morgan household.

"Great! Hey, by the way, do you think I could borrow a few pots and pans?"

Courtney shook her head in aggravation. _How on earth did Jason get through the day? _"Sure, Sam. You can borrow a few pots and pans."

"Great. I'll try and stop by later. I want to get some practice in before Friday. See you later."

Courtney groaned then clicked back over to Carly singing along to the radio.

"That was Sam. She's borrowing pots and pans. You're going with me," said Courtney.

"Like I said before I was interrupted by everyone's favorite bed-warmer, I'm taking some driving lessons and no, I'm not going."

"What's the worse that can happen?" asked Courtney starting to become annoyed.

"Hm, let's see. You know how I told you about how I walked in on my own funeral that one time? Put it this way, I won't be making a cameo appearance since I'll actually be in the coffin this time around!" Carly shot back.

"Carly …"

"Courtney …"

"Just listen, okay? I swear I will forever be indebted to you if you go along with this. Anything you want, I'll do," said Courtney quietly.

"You'll steal Jason from Sam and have beautiful babies?"

"Except that," Courtney replied flatly.

"Fine. Ugh … I'll go to your stupid dinner party. I'll risk food poisoning and death just because I'm a good friend. But I swear if I suddenly collapse and end up in Intensive Care by the end of the night, it's on _your_ head."

Courtney smiled then laughed. "Thank you, Carly. I adore you, Carly. I love you, Carly."

"Yeah, yeah," was all Carly said before hanging up.

Courtney sat back and thought to herself. She was positive Sam wasn't going to poison them. Only someone like Carly would dream up such a thought. Worst case scenario would be the food tasting absolutely horrible, which she was positive would happen. Sam didn't even have the attention span to watch a commercial, how the hell could she cook a full dinner? Hm … best case scenario –Sam could burn the food, offer to re-cook everything, Courtney and Carly make an excuse for having plans and not being able to wait, then high-tailing out of there and going for drinks at Metro Court. Sounded good to her.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock on her door. She opened it to see Jason covered in rain.

"Hey," he said.

"…Hi …" said Courtney, not sure why he was standing in front of him. She noticed his damp hair and the drops of water on his jacket.

"I was out and Sam called my cell. She said something about some pots and pans?"

"Oh yeah, here, come in," said Courtney reaching for his arm to pull him inside. She closed the door behind him.

Jason dug into his pocket. "She had me make a list of everything she needed."

He handed the crumpled piece of paper to Courtney, who laughed as she opened it up.

"I never could read your writing," she said walking over to the kitchen.

Jason let out a small laugh before walking over to the counter and leaning against it.

"Watch it," he joked.

Courtney giggled. "Lemme see … I got a skillet here … a saucer," she said as steel grater eased its way out of the wooden cabinet and onto the floor.

Jason and Courtney both stooped to the floor to retrieve it, stopping as their hands touch.

Courtney looked at him, a slight smile beginning to appear on her face. "Is this one of those cheesy soap moments where we both reach for something, only to look in each other's eyes then fall into a kiss?" she said barely above a whisper.

Jason stared at her mouth. "I think it is," he said.

This time around, Courtney was positive that Jason was the one who initiated the kiss. Absolutely positive, she was. She was also sure that no matter how wrong it was, she wasn't going to give into her guilt this time –no matter where this sudden burst of emotion would lead them.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**A/N: **Whew! I think this is my longest update ever so you better enjoy! J/K. But it is a long one. It really took forever to build up everything, which is why things didn't really pick up until Chapter 12! I pretty much got everything else planned out so things should go swimmingly after this. Yay! Now get to readin'!

* * *

What seemed like seconds after Jason pulled her in, Courtney felt her hands move to his shoulders and slowly yet eagerly began to remove his wet jacket. He gradually walked them over to the couch as his mouth moved from hers and towards her collarbone. Courtney felt no hesitation as she buried her face into the crook of his neck, letting his own familiar scent and the smell of rain collide and finally take her under.

She made intense eye contact with him as he began to unbutton her sweater, eventually letting it fall to the floor, next to his damp t-shirt which she had already swiftly removed within seconds of him leading her to the couch.

Courtney reached out and palmed his face with her delicate hands, bringing him closer to her. She kissed him passionately, intensely -and not giving a damn about that talkative, overly jolly expectant brunette.

As she felt his warm torso compress against hers, and his tongue run across her naked flesh, she moved her hands to his jeans and …

"Courtney. Courtney?"

"Yeah?" she asked nonchalantly, not sure what had just happened.

"Are you okay?" Jason asked standing up.

She looked around confused. "Uh … when did you get here?"

Jason laughed. "I came to get a few pots and pans for Sam … she's cooking you and Carly dinner … you dropped a few things and sort of just froze on the floor.'

Courtney brought her hands to her cheeks, praying that weren't as red as they felt, for they were burning with embarrassment.

"Well, I think this is enough," said Jason still looking at Courtney a bit puzzled.

"Yeah …" was all she replied with. She watched him walked towards the door before she blurted out: "What happened on the docks?"

Courtney saw Jason tense up before turning around to look at him.

"I don't know who kissed who or but it happened and I want to know why," she continued moving over to the couch. "I know that one the phone I just … played it off and acted like it didn't bother me but it does …"

Jason shrugged. "It just happened, Courtney … but it won't again."

"I didn't say I didn't want it to happen again," she said quietly, slightly taken aback by what she just stated. "I mean …"

"It just happened, Courtney," Jason repeated before turning to leave.

* * *

"Carly would you stop it?" yelled Courtney, grabbing her friends hand and violently squeezing them. "You're going to get us stuck in this damn thing."

The two women were riding the elevator up to Jason and Sam's penthouse. Carly was attempting at anything and everything to stall their arrival, including pressing every single button she could get her fingers on.

"Yeah, I was sorta hoping for that," the brunette replied. She scratched her head then glanced mischievously at the panel. "I wonder what'll happen if I push this little red one …"

"Don't even think of it!" warned Courtney. "Oh my God, I feel like I'm baby-sitting you!"

Carly scoffed. "Oh stop it! You sound like Sonny … or Jason … or my mother. Anyways, what's your rush? We're eating a meal at Sam's … cooked by Sam. Personally, I'd rather be on my way to Judgment Day, at least I'd know what to expect."

She toyed with the large purse on her shoulder. Courtney rolled her eyes, looking at it.

"Why did you bring that thing?" she asked annoyed.

"Be it known that this is a Hermes Birkin bag … and besides, it was the only purse in my closet big enough to stuff a whole meal in," answered Carly. "I figured I'd go feed a few stray dogs afterwards. It'll sort of be my good deed for the day."

Courtney opened her mouth to speak but decided against it, shaking her head instead. To question the way Carly's mind work would be to question why the sky was blue. It just wasn't to be understood.

"What?" asked Carly innocently.

"Nothing, Carly. I just want things to go smoothly," sighed Courtney staring above and impatiently tapping her foot. "God, what's taking so long?"

Her sudden change of subject earned a laugh from Carly. "Honey, who on earth do you think you're fooling? You could care less about Sam. You're only here for Jason."

Before Courtney could respond, the elevator crane abruptly stopped. Its light flickered off then on again.

"Yes!" Carly whispered.

Courtney looked over at her in amazement. "Are you kidding me? You broke the elevator!"

"Oh, stop it! Relax, alright? It's not broke. This old thing stops all the time. It'll start moving in a few minutes," Carly said. "Though … this one time, Max was stuck in here for a week with nothing but a piece of French toast and a gun …" She saw Courtney's eyes widen as she turned to look at her. "Kidding! Okay? _Just kidding_."

She eased onto the floor and crossed her legs, sitting her purse next to her then motioned for Courtney to do the same.

Instead, Courtney pushed the 'bell' button. When she heard no sound, she pushed again.

"_You're wasting your time_ …" sang Carly whipping out a magazine. She stared intensely at the cover. "God, I love her hair."

Courtney slid down to the floor next to her. "Do you care? Do you even care that we're in an elevator. No one knows we're he- wait a minute!"

She pulled out her cell phone but before she could even attempt to flip it open, Carly snatched it from her.

"No reception in this baby," said Carly, a sly grin appearing on her face.

Throwing her hands up in disgust, she exhaled deeply, only to be mimicked by Carly. She then cleared her throat before Carly did the same.

"Stop it!"

"What? I had something in my throat!" Carly shot back. "Jesus Christ, what is your problem tonight? Don't worry, Jason isn't going anywhere."

"Do not start with me …"

"Fine … but you know you still want him otherwise you wouldn't have worn that," she quickly said eyeing Courtney's spaghetti strap top that cut so low, even Carly had to look away.

Courtney turned towards her. "How many times do I have to explain this to you? Get it through your head. Jason is married-"

"That's not a marriage, that's a farce, hun."

"And he and I are not getting back together-"

"Not if I can help it …"

"Carly! Would you just stop?" Courtney cried.

Carly's look turned serious and she threw down the magazine. "I just want you to be honest with yourself, Courtney. Look, I know I joke around a lot and I may even say crazy things at times but I'm serious on this one … _really _serious. You know as well as I know that you have all of these bottled up emotions for Jason. You're keeping them inside and that's not healthy. Why not just go with them?"

"He's married Carly. And he's not just married, he has a child on the way with his wife," responded Courtney.

"So in the meantime, Sam wins …"

"What are you talking about?" Courtney practically screamed. "This isn't a competition for Jason. It never has been and it never will be. She didn't _win _anything. She got what she wanted and he got what he wanted. They are two people, married and happy and expecting a child. I'm not going to go and trash that just because I may still care for Jason."

Carly frowned. "Do you love Jason?" she asked solemnly.

Courtney looked away and ran her fingers through her hair then shrugged. "No … I'm not in love with Jason."

"I didn't ask if you were in love with him and you know it," Carly said. "Do … you … _love _… him."

"Hello? Is someone down there?" a muffled voice called out from above.

Courtney scurried to stand. "Yes. We're stuck!" she yelled.

"I'm going to get you help," the voice responded.

"Saved by the Sam," said Carly getting to her feet.

"How did you know that was Sam?" Courtney asked dusting her hands against her pants.

"That voice is … like no other."

* * *

"Sam this is … really good," said Courtney through gritted teeth, trying her damnest now to ingest whatever the hell she chewing.

"More like awful -," Carly muttered under her breath.

"Awfully good!" finished Courtney, digging her stiletto heel into Carly's foot. "Yes, awfully good."

"Wow! Thank you. I've been working at it all day," replied Sam sincerely.

A smile appeared on Sam's face and for a moment, a brief moment, Courtney felt almost bad that the food tasted like pure through-and-through shit.

"Practicing all week, actually," continued Sam. "Too bad Jason isn't here. I think he'd be rather pleased. But more than anything, I wanted to really thank you for the shower and what's more personal than a home-made dinner?"

"Well, if this is our thank you then …," started Carly. She saw Courtney shoot her a look out of the corner of her eye. "Well, we must have done a … darn good job. Um, Courtney, can you come to the bathroom with me, I need to … powder my nose."

She pulled Courtney by her arm and out of her seat.

"We'll be right back," Carly said smiling.

* * *

"I thought you had to powder your nose," commented Courtney as she stood with Carly in Jason and Sam's bathroom with her arms crossed.

"I don't even wear powder … hey, I wonder what these are," Carly said as stood on her tip-toes and reached for a bottle of prescription pills in the medicine cabinet.

"Put those back!" Courtney whispered sharply, snatching the container. She placed them back in its original spot, only to have three more bottles fall to the floor. She rushed to pick them up.

"Can we just get out of here?" she asked looking around at the walls.

Carly followed her eyes. "Can you believe Jason let her paint this place lavender?" She went over to the toilet and emptied her purse over bowl.

"Oh, Carly that is gross," said Courtney turning away at the mashed variety of food.

"You didn't expect me to eat that did you? Though I gotta admit those biscuits were pretty good. Now, I definitely wouldn't mind taking a few of those home. Ew. I gotta get this dry-cleaned."

She finished then walked out of the bathroom with Courtney following behind her. But instead of turning to walk down the stairs, she nonchalantly strolled into the master bedroom.

Before she could protest, Courtney froze as she noticed how not a single piece of furniture or figurine or even curtain had changed since she moved out.

"This is room is …" Courtney began.

"Beautiful," finished Carly. She walked over and ran her hand along the Cherrywood dresser then reached up to touch the long beige drapes. "I have to give it to Sam … she did a great job in this room."

"Sam didn't decorate this room," said Courtney walking over to the armoire and unconsciously opening it to reveal the flat-screen television she had surprised Jason with for his birthday one year. "I decorated this room way before Jason and I even got married." She slowly closed the door and turned to Carly. "He hasn't changed a damn thing a here."

Carly smiled. "That's gotta mean something, Courtney."

"Yeah … Sam just hasn't gotten to this room yet," shrugged Courtney. She didn't respond when Carly uttered a "yeah right". Instead, she found herself just as curious about the room as her friend did.

"Well, one thing that has definitely changed –your closet," remarked Carly leafing through Sam's clothing. "Look at all of this. I've never seen so much black and mini skirts, and, ooh, so much Donna Karan!" She yanked a sweater off of its hanger. "Where did she get this and what does she know about Donna?"

Still a bit uncomfortable from the appearance of the room, Courtney took the garment from Carly and threw it back in the closet. "Come on, let's go," she said trying to lead Carly out of the room.

Before they could reach the door, Carly wiggled out of Courtney's clutch and whispered: "I forgot my purse!"

Courtney groaned as Carly turned back around and ran back. As she heard Carly search for her beloved and trusty Hermes, she found herself wandering towards the guest room.

She smiled at the formerly cream colored room which was now painted a mint green color. The wood furniture was now replaced with a white, antique bedroom set. And the abstract artwork that once graced the walls had long been replaced with pop-art pieces. Not something she would have done to the room but then again, this wasn't her room –or even her house. But she couldn't help but laugh as she thought about

Courtney heard Carly's footsteps coming down the hall. She laughed. "How ugly is this room?" she said before turning around … only to come face to face with Jason.

"Jason …"

The man in front of her just snickered. "Nice to see someone else shares my opinion."

But instead of responding, she suddenly pulled him into a kiss.

When he pulled back, Courtney leaned back in but was stopped as Jason gripped her arms.

"What?" she whispered knowing exactly what he was thinking. In that moment, she didn't care how desperate she may have sounded or even how right Carly had been about her feelings for Jason. All she cared about was that very moment and what she seemed to need.

"Courtney, you don't-"

"I didn't say I didn't want it to happen again," she interrupted.

Remembering their conversation from a few days earlier, Jason rubbed a hand over his face in completely frustration. His wife was downstairs, patiently waiting before the meal she had been a bit too eager to prepare. He was positive she was still sitting in her same spot, softly humming to the ever-growing child inside her, something she often found herself doing out of the blue. But whatever she was doing, she was oblivious to what was occurring in her very home. And then there was Courtney in front of him, practically begging him to do whatever he pleased. He knew that face and that tone all too well. He was hesitant but couldn't deny the fact that she could still get to him.

So, taking her words as confirmation, he decided to stop fighting himself, to stop lying to himself and chose to just surrender.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**DISCLAIMER: **The items mentioned in this story, along with their prices, really do exist. I went to Tiffany & Co's. official site and did my research! But, I do not own these beautiful products. Yeah right. Only in my little trophy wife fantasies. Aren't you proud, Nicole?

**A/N: **Gracias for the reviews! This chapter is not only long but also a little different. I needed to move things WAY forward (does that make sense? _Way forward?_). Therefore, the beginning is sort of just a background synopsis. Enjoy –or not …

* * *

Quite some time had past since Courtney had encountered Jason in the guest room of the penthouse he shared with Sam. Sam … his wife … the mother of his unborn child. And while they hadn't exactly gone _all _the way, Courtney couldn't help but to feel a bit guilty. After all, she was basically stripped down to nothing but her underwear when Jason abruptly stopped after hearing Carly calling for Courtney. Sure she hadn't had sex with him but she was almost positive she would have allowed herself to if Carly wasn't in another room and especially if Sam wasn't downstairs -and the fact that that was her mentality scared her to death. She had no limits with Jason. Never had. And she knew that anything he would have asked of her, she would have been more than eager to do. She was always ready, willing and able in every single way possible. 

Courtney had seen Jason a few times in passing since that night. She'd be strolling along the docks and catch him talking to a business associate. They'd lock eyes but never stop going on about their way. Or she'd sitting in Kelly's and he'd come in to pick up an order. Walking out, he'd look at her and vice-versa but nothing would come out of it. Though every now and then, Jason would stop by at random times. 10:00 P.M, 12:15 AM, he even visited once at 2:37 AM. Courtney always found it amusing. She found it even more amusing that she'd actually wait up for him, expecting him to show up.

Usually he was tired from running around all day, so she'd cook him a meal. Courtney would unplug all the phone lines and they'd sit and eat together. Other times, they'd sit on the couch and just talk. But no late night meeting would end without something being taken a little further than planned. Even the smallest things would turn into something more. If they were deep in conversation, Jason would pull her over into his arms and rest his chin atop her head. Or he'd get up to leave and when she'd kiss him goodbye, they would always end up in her bed as things got a little heavier. However, they'd always stop before everything went too far. They each made sure of that. It was sort of like a mutual understanding but there was only so much either one could take.

And while, Jason hadn't _technically _cheated on his wife, Courtney still couldn't help but feel some sort of reluctance towards their current situation. While she knew she shouldn't feel _that _guilty, she couldn't bring herself to share what was going on –not even with Carly.

"So what was Jason doing here?" Carly asked one night after dropping by while Jason was on his way out the door. "And what was going on with your phone?"

"We were talking. The phone was off because I didn't want anyone interrupting us," she'd answer, making perfect eye contact with her friend.

"What did you-"

"Carly that's between Jason and me," Courtney would respond quietly before changing the subject so cleverly that even Carly didn't catch on.

In reality, she wasn't lying. The phone was off because she _didn't_ want anyone to interrupt them. And they did talk –when they weren't tearing off one another's clothes. Besides, Carly didn't need to know the whole truth. Just like Sam didn't. Not that Jason ever mentioned Sam while they were together. Courtney had just assumed that Sam thought that Jason was out working late. Hey, it wasn't her fault. Hit-men had odd hours. That was a given. And if Jason didn't want her to know then she couldn't do anything about it. She wasn't the married one. But she also knew how frighteningly naïve Sam was, not that she was really complaining.

* * *

"Carly, I really have to go," said Courtney scurrying about the loft trying to find the match to the earring she was placing in her right ear. 

"Jesus. Where's the fire?" Carly asked as she twirled around in front of the mirror admiring herself in one of Courtney's skirts. "Can I have this? I can't believe it fits me. Not that you're fat or anything-"

"Sure. Whatever. Take it, Carly," replied Courtney ignoring her friend. "Where is that damn earring?"

"Oh, this diamond stud?" said Carly timidly raising a hand to the second hole in her left ear.

Courtney sighed then walked over and snatched it out.

"Ouch!" cried Carly. "That really hurt! Where are you off to anyway?"

Courtney moved to in front of the mirror to examine her outfit. Her gray v-neck sweater was fitted but not too tight. Her jeans, the same. Her blonde locks were down and random pieces framed her face and neck. It was the appropriate attire … for the occasion.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked –as Jason came barging through the door.

Courtney shoved her hands in her pockets and hung her head. "Here we go," she thought to herself.

The brunette walked over to Jason and looked at Courtney then back at Jason.

"_Wait a minute …_" she said, a sly smirk spreading across her face. "You two are …"

"Going to look at baby stuff," Jason finished. Courtney smiled to herself. "Sam's not feeling well and she's eager to get a few more things in the room and she doesn't trust me so she suggested for me to bring Courtney along."

Carly looked suspiciously at Courtney, who was slipping her jacket on, avoiding eye contact this time.

"Do me a favor and take the spare key and lock up when you leave alright?" said Courtney walking towards the door. She spun back around and smiled sweetly, blowing Carly a kiss before proceeding to follow Jason out.

* * *

"Well, that was … interesting," said Courtney laughing. 

She looked out of the window and onto all of Port Charles as the two sat in Jason's car above Vista Point.

"Yes, it was," remarked Jason letting out a slight laugh.

Courtney thought back to earlier as she and Jason walked through the large store, eagerly searching for anything, everything Baby Morgan. Eagerly searching hand in hand, that is.

She didn't remember exactly when their hands suddenly intertwined but when she did notice it, Courtney decided she didn't really mind it –and if she suddenly snatched her hand back, then what exactly would Jason think? So she kept it where it was, tucked securely inside of Jason's. She didn't even say anything when Jason allowed the elderly saleswoman to assume they were married and shopping for their new baby. Shockingly, it didn't faze her at all.

But her thoughts were brought back to Sam, as Jason mumbled something about a list.

Courtney rolled her eyes as Jason handled it to her.

_Baby Items (ONLY to be purchased at Tiffany & Co.) _it began.

"I see she's very much into the list thing," she giggled. Jason nodded, clearly frustrated.

After an hour in the department store, and one $125 sterling silver rattle, along with a $75 piggy bank (_"the pink one not the blue one"_) and $95 feeding spoon later, the pair decided that while they didn't purchase every exact thing on Sam's ridiculous list, they were bored and in need of something to eat.

Courtney wasn't expecting to dine at Kelly's but she sure as hell didn't expect Jason to drive way two and a half hours either. Two and half hours meant $40.00 appetizers and desserts she couldn't pronounce –not a cheeseburger.

"_That must be a damn good burger,"_ she wanted to say to him but decided against it, knowing his reasons for bringing her there. And she couldn't argue really, they were good reasons. But how come he seemed a bit more uncomfortable than she did? Why did he hesitate or tense up whenever she mentioned Sam?

Were they honestly wrong in what they were doing? Unlike before, she couldn't find a reason to verify her question though deep down her soul answered it in everyway possible.

And so there they were, sitting in near deafening silence. Courtney was used to starting the small-talk but she had to admit it was getting tiresome after awhile.

They couldn't talk about the things they did when they were married. In all honesty, that life just didn't exist anymore. Not that either one craved it, but the awkwardness was something new. It hadn't subsisted until now. Hell, she was even more comfortable around him when she was still married to A.J.

"So Sam is going out of town next week," Jason said suddenly, toying with the radio.

Courtney looked on in disbelief. Jason never listened to music. He probably couldn't even name one single station.

"Yeah? What for?" she replied regaining her composure.

He continued to play with the buttons. "She's visiting her grandmother. She said she didn't need me to come along and I didn't feel like arguing so she's going by herself."

"Good deal," Courtney answered.

"So I was thinking you should come over and stay for a few days," Jason said, finally looking at her.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**A/N: **Hiya, folks. Wow. _Yet another update._ Aren't we the spoiled ones, hm?

* * *

Courtney stood in front of her bed staring at the packed suitcase that lay open. 

"_So I was thinking you should come over and stay for a few days_"

The suggestion had replayed itself in her mind at least a million times ever since that night at Vista Point. She didn't tell Jason she would … and she didn't tell Jason she wouldn't either. In fact, all she said was a simple, "I'll let you know."

But three days had gone and how was she supposed to let him know what _she_ didn't even know. One moment, was "absolutely not", while the next, like this one, was more like "you bet your ass I'll be there." She went back and forth. Not that she hadn't tried to make up her mind. She had called Jason's phone precisely seven times before hanging up right after the first ring. She even went as far as going to the penthouse but would always end up turning around as soon as the elevator doors spread open. In actuality, she wanted to stay with Jason –she just didn't trust herself around him. If she couldn't even control herself during a simple dinner, what was she supposed to do while spending a couple of days with him? In _his _house? And, more than likely, in _his _bed. Actually, in his and Sam's bed. Even she had reservations about that. She knew Jason wouldn't allow her to sleep on the couch and the baby room was off-limits and she'd sleep in that awful room with that weird green color if need be but she knew she wasn't invited over for that reason. Or maybe she was. Maybe Jason did just want her to stay for a few days. You know. Maybe so he can have someone to talk to. Someone to come home to since his wife was gone. Maybe he wasn't even thinking the way she was. After all, he was always the first to pull away when things got a little too heavy. He never explained why, but that was Jason for you.

As Courtney reluctantly walked over to her dresser to pull out a few more items of clothing, purposely skipping over the dozen negligees she had acquired, a knock came to her door. She opened it to reveal Carly who was holding Morgan in her arms with a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Look who I brought!" she squealed.

"Oh my God!" said Courtney reaching for the little boy. "Gimme!" She took Morgan from Carly and went to sit on the couch as Carly followed her.

"How did you manage to get a day with him?" she asked removing his coat.

Carly removed her on as she sat down. "Reese and Sonny are out of town. Surprise, surprise. And apparently Michael and Morgan's new nanny, Bethany, who is, get this, still in braces, has no idea who I am. I told her I was Reese's sister and that I was supposed to come pick him up for a few hours."

"Carly, you didn't!" laughed Courtney. "Where's Michael?"

"Oh yes I did. And Michael's with a friend," she smoothed Morgan's shirt. "So, Morgan is spending a little time with his _real _mom."

The little boy giggled as Courtney ruffled his dark hair.

Carly laughed in response then her look turned serious. "Isn't it amazing how much he smiles? How much he laughs? How his happiness literally knows no boundaries? He's been through so much and he doesn't even know it."

Courtney looked at her friend then back at the little boy. "What do mean?" she asked.

"It's just that Sonny and I have been through so much but no one has suffered more than my boys … our boys," she sighed. "I mean, Sonny and I … we have done plenty of spiteful, evil, crazy things to one another but that whole Sam and Lorenzo fiasco just completely tops everything. If I'm still reeling from it then I know Michael is."

"You and Sonny were hurting so you two lashed out at one another," Courtney offered solemnly.

"Yeah, well, Michael and Morgan didn't deserve that," Carly replied. "Given, I shouldn't have tried to payback Sonny by sleeping with Lorenzo but he was just as wrong for taking Sam to bed. Or, from what I hear, it was the other way around. Anyways, the details don't matter. What matters is that my children were put through hell because of the stupid mistakes their parents made. No matter what Sonny may have thought he felt for Sam or what I thought I may have felt for Lorenzo, it wasn't worth the hell we put them through. Kids don't deserve that. Not when they're so young and innocent."

Courtney bit down on her lip, trying to occupy herself with the little boy in her lap.

"I still wonder at times how Sam can sleep at night knowing what she did," Carly said retying Morgan's shoe.

"Sam has moved on. Lorenzo as too. He and Skye are married with children. He's over it and I'm sure Sam is too."

Carly was taken aback by Courtney's statement. She let out a sarcastic laugh. "You're not serious-"

"Yes, I am serious," Courtney replied suddenly looking up. "Sam slept with a married man. Lorenzo slept with a married woman. They're both as guilty as the other."

"I admitted I was wrong for sleeping with Lorenzo but its not my fault I had feelings for him. My ever distraught ex-husband decided go all Walker Texas Ranger on me."

"And I don't blame you but you can't keep using that excuse. You still did what you did …"

"Sam knew exactly what she was doing when she saw my husband on the docks that night," Carly interrupted. "She knew Sonny was married, Courtney."

"Yeah, maybe she did but you don't know how she may have felt when she saw the aftermath of everything. Or even when she was caught up in the midst of everything. The constant arguing between you and Sonny. The custody battle. Michael rebelling left and right. Maybe she did feel guilty. Maybe she regretted everything."

"Tell me you're not taking her side, Courtney," Carly said. "Tell me that you're not trying to justify her being my husband's mistress."

"_Ex-_husband, Carly," Courtney answered. "And, no, I'm not justifying her actions but … sometimes people do things without thinking. It's human nature. Don't …don't make Sam out to be this horrible person, okay."

Carly shook her head in disbelief. "So what is she? A saint? This perfect little wife Jason hypes her up to be? Tell you what," she clasped her hands together and rested them under her chin. "I wonder what she'd do if Jason starting screwing around behind her back."

Courtney shot the brunette a look. "Don't say that," she said before getting up and walking to the bedroom.

"No, I'm serious," continued Carly following closely behind. "If Jason were to cheat on her, she couldn't say a damn thing because what goes around comes around. She would deserve it and I say more power to Jason if he did."

Courtney suddenly spun around. The words hit her hard. "How can you wish that on someone when you just sat here and poured your heart out about how badly you and your children were hurt?" Courtney asked in almost a whisper. "Sam is pregnant. She's married. Yes, she made a mistake and I'm sure whenever she sees Sonny or you or Michael or Morgan, she's reminded of just how badly she screwed up all over again. You have no idea what was going on in her head at that time. But, she doesn't deserve that, Carly. You didn't deserve it … I didn't deserve it. But it happened and you get over it and you move on."

Carly went to speak but nothing came out. For the first time ever, she was speechless.

The two stood facing one another for a few awkward moments. Carly stared at the ground, making invisible circles with her bare feet.

"So, you going on vacation or something?" said Carly breaking the silence. She walked over to Courtney's luggage.

"Um … actually, I was …," she saw Carly eye the items in the suitcase and the open dresser drawers.

"Oh, where were you going?" Carly asked innocently, genuinely oblivious to what was right in front of her. She sat on the bed, taking Morgan out of Courtney's arms.

"I was just going to get away for a few days." It wasn't a lie. It wasn't the truth.

"_Where_?" pressured Carly. "Don't tell me you were going to, like, Miami or Maui, without even inviting me. I get sick of Port Charles too, ya know."

Courtney sighed. "No, no, nothing like that. Nothing like that at all."

"Then what?"

"Doesn't matter," replied Courtney.

"What's the big deal, I just wanna-"

"Carly, just drop it!" Courtney snapped. When she saw Carly look up at her in shock she exhaled deeply and rubbed a hand over her face. "I'm sorry … I'm just not having a good day, or week, for that matter."

"Well, I've been known to give out pretty shitty advice but maybe just this once, I can help you with something," she said slightly laughing.

Courtney sat down next to her. "Actually, you've helped me more with that petty little argument of ours just now than in my whole time of knowing you," she said focusing on the suitcase. "Now, its time to actually take that advice and help myself."


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

**A/N**: How was that wait kiddies? … Anyways, ahem, this chapter is for Stephi –the love of my internet life. You had me at hello. You complete me …

* * *

Courtney sat on the edge of her bed, her phone cradled in her hands. She stared out the window with nothing but a blank stare. 

"_I wonder what she'd do if Jason starting screwing around behind her back."_

Carly's words had echoed continuously in her mind. As wrong as Sam was for what happened between her and Sonny, Courtney knew Carly was wrong too. In fact, she even believed that Carly herself knew how wrong she was deep down. But that didn't matter anyway really because Jason wasn't, as Carly put it, "screwing around" behind his wife's back. He was having a friendship or companionship or whatever you called two people who weren't together but acted like it in public when one of the people were married. But even she couldn't lie to herself anymore. Their alleged "rendezvous'", or whatever they were, weren't going to be so innocent anymore if she went through with his request. And if she had chosen to stay with him for however long Sam was going to be gone, she knew she'd leave that penthouse feeling a lot guiltier than she already felt. If that was even possible.

"_Kids don't deserve that. Not when they're so young and innocent."_

"God, of all the things to say, Carly" she said to no one in particular.

Wait a minute. Could she even consider their child as innocent? It wasn't even born yet!

"Stop it, Courtney!" she cried once again into the empty room. Their child wasn't innocent, it was even more fragile. That little girl inside of Sam hadn't even seen the light of day yet and she was already being screwed over.

"_Thanks, in part to me_," Courtney thought to herself.

But unlike other situations and mishaps that had occurred in her life, this was one she could get out of. Easily. Absolutely no questions or strings attached. Sure it was a possible a few feelings would still be intact but they would fade along with the guilt. Wouldn't they? At least that's how it had to be.

Courtney took a deep breath before beginning to dial the number, sighing as it went straight to voicemail.

"Hey, Jason. It's Courtney. I need you call me when you get this. Bye."

She groaned at the fact that his phone was off. Where the hell was he? But then again, she couldn't help but smile at how simple the message was: "Leave one."

Only Jason could pull that off.

Courtney got up and walked towards the kitchen. She sat down and wondered what exactly she would be doing if she were at his penthouse right now. More than likely, she'd be doing exactly what she was doing when she was married at this time of night –sitting on the couch reading a magazine. God did that penthouse bore her to tears at times. She wasn't allowed out after a certain time and she could only chat so long with Carly. Jason knew how much she hated it. But he'd always come home as soon as he could and spend the rest of the night making it up to her. She laughed out loud at the mere thought of it.

Courtney lifted the kitchen phone off its receiver and dialed Carly's cell.

"Hello?..."

"Hey, Carly. I-"

"Gotcha! Yes, you've reached Carly's cell. Unfortunately I'm unavailable or just ignoring you. Either way, leave a message."

Courtney rubbed her temples. "Where is everybody," she yelled into the phone. "Listen, Carly. I had plans but they fell through. I was calling because I'm bored and just sick of staring at these walls so just call me back alright?"

She slammed the phone down and put her head down on the counter, letting it bang against the counter once or twice out of pure aggravation.

"At least I wouldn't be bored with Jason!" she screamed as a knock came.

Her head shot up and she scrambled to the door, checking her hair first.

She opened it to Jax.

"You have got to be kidding me," Courtney said closing the door, only to have him slam his hand against it to keep it open.

Jax strolled in nonchalantly, turning on his heels as Courtney stood with her arms crossed, backed against the door.

"What do you want, Jax?"

He grinned. "Why do I get the feeling you're not happy to see me?"

Courtney just stared at him, wondering how she once found that conceited manner of his so damn charming. Every single word out of his mouth was once lapped up by her. Every action, every move of his. For a while, she actually thought he was the perfect man.

Jax walked around the penthouse, eyeing various objects and furniture.

"You know this is really sad," he remarked.

Courtney replied waving him off. "Why are you here? What are you doing in town anyway?"

"Not that its any of your concern but I'm here on business. I thought I'd stop by." His phone rang and he dug it out his pocket. "Hello?" he looked over at Courtney. "Yeah. Have you arrived safely? That's good. I can't really talk right now. I'll call you back. Yes. Bye."

"So who was that, Jax? One of your girlfriends? Pretty late for her to be talking on the phone. You sure her parents don't mind?" Courtney retorted.

"That's really cute, Courtney, really," he said laughing. "But, anything is a lot better than being alone right?"

Courtney tensed up. "For your information, I'm not-" she bit her tongue. Jax was the last person she'd bring up Jason to. "You know, I may be living here alone. You know, poor old single me but I can _promise _you that anything, and I mean _anything, _is better than having to wake up to you everyday."

Jax scoffed. "You loved it."

Courtney let out a laugh. "Ah, well _looks _can be deceiving. Now leave." She walked over to the door and opened it.

"Can't I just-"

"Jax, get out of here!" she yelled completely annoyed. "Just leave!"

"Um, do you need to borrow my bat, Courtney?" a voice said behind her.

She turned around to see Carly grimacing. The thin brunette walked in and placed her hands on her hips.

"Carly," greeted Jax with a smirk on his face.

She faked a smile. "Jax. Now do you have some sort of hearing impairment or what? I mean, I know you didn't hear that vow about forsaking all others but is it really that serious? You may want to go get that checked out."

"Since when do you speak for Courtney?" he questioned.

Before something could escalate, Courtney jumped in.

"Carly, just leave it alone, alright?" She turned to Jax. "Leave. I'm not going to ask you again."

Jax snickered while walking over to the door. "See you around," he said before walking out and closing the door behind him.

Courtney let out a deep sigh, throwing herself onto the couch. "Don't even ask, Carly."

Carly's face lit up. "Okay, I won't but I did get your voicemail. I didn't answer because I've decided that it's rather difficult to drive _and _talk. Anyways, guess what … I finally found a place!" She jumped up and down. "Courtney, it is so perfect! I love it already."

"That's great," said Courtney perking up. "Where is it? Is it close to your old apartment?"

"Actually … it's, um, closer to here."

"Really? I know they were building some really nice condo's about three blocks away. Is it over there?"

Carly sat down next to Courtney. "Uh … you're getting warmer." When a look of confusion appeared on Courtney's face she screamed, "I'm moving in here!"

Courtney stared at her. "Here, _here? _As in … this couch is … _our _couch?"

"No, silly! I'm moving downstairs. A Mrs.-"

"A Mrs. Adler moved out," Courtney finished. "Yeah, the elderly woman downstairs. She's moving in with her daughter. She couldn't afford her bills anymore."

"Yep! And you know what they say about one person's treasure, um, or another person's, anyways, I'm moving in! This way, our phone bills won't be so high. If I need advice on my non-existent love life or in need of help for steaming spinach, all I gotta do is hop on the elevator! It'll be like a dorm hall or something! Aren't you excited?"

Courtney nodded. "Um, yes. Very."

Carly frowned. "You don't seem excited." Courtney's phone suddenly rang. "I'll get it," said Carly.

Courtney sprang up. "No! I'll get it!" She ran over to the counter.

"Hello?"

"Hey" the voice answered.

"Hi … um," she looked up to see Carly staring at her curiously.

She put her hand over the mouthpiece. "I'm gonna go in the hallway."

Carly smiled slyly. "Sure. You just go right ahead," she answered sitting on the couch.

Courtney hurried out and slammed the door. She slid down onto the floor and crossed her legs. "Okay."

"Carly?" Jason asked with a laugh.

She giggled. "You know her so well. But, yes, Carly is here."

There was a silence between them for a few seconds. Courtney scrambled for something to say in order to avoid the inevitable but it was too late.

"So … what time are you coming over?" Jason said.

Courtney leaned back against the wall and exhaled. "I … decided not to stay over, Jason."

When he didn't reply, she continued: "I just wouldn't feel right …"

"What are you talking about?" Jason replied.

Courtney was taken aback. "I just … I feel guilty, you know?"

"Feel guilty? We haven't done anything," Jason said quickly. She heard him breath deeply and she almost felt bad for disappointing him –if that's what you could call it.

"I know that but it's just … I don't even know how to describe everything. I just know that I can't stay with you while Sam is away," Courtney said slowly drawing imaginary sketches on the cool, bare floor with her finger. "… And I know that I've been going along with everything but I had this really … interesting conversation with someone and-"

"And something got to you," finished Jason.

Normally she would have smiled. Even laughed. She loved it when he finished her sentences because it proved just how well he knew her. She had never had any do that before. But now? It just wasn't the same. And that could be said for more than just him completing her sentences. It could be said for a lot more.

But then again, he was right –as usual. They _hadn't _done anything. What's dinner and a few kisses? And even that didn't even happen all the time. It didn't happen when they went shopping for Sam or that time they took a late night motorcycle ride. In fact, they just talked and laugh. It felt good to finally be able to just be around someone other than Carly. And though her best friend did give her meaningful advice in her own little way, it could only go so far.

"So … I'll talk to you soon, okay?" she said in nearly a whisper. She then heard him hang up. He wasn't mad, she decided. Maybe just frustrated. Not that Jason ever craved company but maybe he did just want her around. She cursed herself again for thinking that Jason wanted something more from her. Why was she constantly thinking like this?

Brushing herself off, she stood up and opened the door. Carly sat on the couch thumbing through a magazine, a smirk on her face.

"What?" Courtney asked innocently. She wondered if Carly had her ear pressed to a glass that was against the door the entire time. She was probably right.

"Don't 'what' me," said Carly throwing the magazine back on the table. "Don't try that innocent act. I know what's going on with you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she answered wanting to kick herself for not going further down the hall to talk. Courtney walked back towards the kitchen and sat back at the counter.

"Yes you do!" Carly cried. She rolled her eyes as the blonde shrugged. "You've got a new boyfriend."

Courtney laughed. "Yes, I do." Carly's eyes widened up. "Yep, his name is José da Silva Pereira. His friend, Mag Wildwood, introduced us. He's from Brazil and he's tall and tan with silver hair and has only known me two weeks and has already promised me the entire world."

She watched as Carly's mouth dropped open. Apparently, she had never caught a showing of _Breakfast at Tiffany's _on American Movie Classics. "Does he have a brother?" she asked eagerly.

Courtney laughed. "No. Kind of hard to have a brother when you yourself don't even exist. Carly, I was talking to my mother and I left the room because I didn't want you to hear me arguing with her in case she decided to piss me off," she said, surprised at how easily the lie came out. She was getting pretty good at this lying thing. Not that it was something to be proud of.

"Oh, please, Court!" Carly walked over to the kitchen and sat down next to her. "That little gleam in your eye. You entire manner. I haven't seen that since you were with Jason. You'd even smile and offer him brownies when he was yelling at you. You're in love with someone and I wanna know who!"

Courtney rubbed her forehead. "I am not in love with anyone … and _please _stop mentioning Jason. _Married _Jason."

"Well, hello, if you've got some hot Brazilian lover, who needs to mention Jason? Just spill!" Her behavior turned sarcastic as she leaned in to Courtney. "Come on. Did he have you at hello? Does he complete you?"

"You're crazy, you know that?" Courtney answered laughing. "I was talking to my mother. That's all you're getting out of me."

Carly scowled. "Fine. But, I am going to track down this José da whatever from Brazil and make him give me all the dirty, exotic details. Lord, knows I am overdue for a fix even if they aren't my own. Anyways, I'm going out shopping for my _new _apartment. Wanna come along?"

Courtney shook her head. "No, I really don't feel like it. You go ahead. I'll stop by later on and help you put everything up or something."

"Okay," Carly responded heading back over to the couch and grabbing her coat. "See ya, hun."

Courtney did a small wave as Carly let herself out. She let her head collapse into her arms.

* * *

A knock came to the door. Courtney quickly raised up. She looked over at the clock through strands of tangled hair. _3:14. _She must have dozed off. Another knock came. She groaned, laying her head back down but abruptly sat back up. Maybe it was Carly. She did say she was coming back over. It definitely wasn't Jax. Surely wasn't Jason. 

Courtney got up slowly and walked over to the door. She opened it up. A smile immediately appearing on her face and she leaned against the door. "Hey you", she said.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

**A/N: **Ch. 16 comin' atcha … I really need to stop …

* * *

A knock came to the door. Courtney quickly rose up. She looked over at the clock through strands of tangled hair. _3:14. _She must have dozed off. Another knock came. She groaned, laying her head back down but abruptly sat back up. Maybe it was Carly. She did say she was coming back over. It definitely wasn't Jax. Surely wasn't Jason. 

Courtney got up slowly and walked over to the door. She opened it up. A smile immediately appearing on her face and she leaned against the door. "Hey you", she said.

Still a bit groggy but nonetheless happy, she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as Jason stood before her, returning the smile.

"And what are you doing here?" Courtney asked quietly. "And with a bag?"

"You said you weren't visiting but you didn't say anything about me coming over," Jason said.

Courtney continued to lean against the door, speechless. Jason caught on to her uneasiness.

"Well, if you don't want me to stay …" he started.

Courtney laughed, grabbing his arm and pulling him close. She wrapped her arms about his neck and smiled. "Of course I want you to stay," she said pressing her lips to his in a kiss but abruptly pulling back before either one could deepen it.

After pulling back, she took his bags and carried them to the bedroom as he slowly closed the door. A lump formed in her throat as she looked at the carefully made bed.

She turned around to see Jason closing his phone.

"You okay?" he asked coming towards her, noticing the tense expression on her face.

Courtney gave him a smile. "Of course, I'm fine," she quickly said. "I just want to sleep with you." She then laughed as he raised an eyebrow. "…_literally_," she added laughing.

"Come on," she said leading him to the room.

* * *

Both were fast asleep, still fully clothed. Courtney's back turned to Jason with his arm protectively embracing her, their fingers interlocked. Their fit each other's familiar mold and neither complained. They had done little talk; no kissing or touching of any sort. They had, in fact, just fallen asleep. 

Everything was seemingly perfect, in its own perplexed, distorted way –until Jason's phone rang. The shrill sound of the ringer was muffled as it was buried into the deep pocket of his jacket.

Courtney feigned sleep as Jason tried ever so carefully to not wake her. She heard him pause for a second as he picked up.

"Hey. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. Do you need me to send you more money? How much? Okay, it should get there tomorrow. The baby okay? That's good. Yeah, I miss you too. I'll call tomorrow. Alright. I love you too."

She heard the loud clamp of the cell phone close and smirked as he got back into bed as carefully as he got out. He gently embraced her again, this time bringing her a little closer and burying his head in the crook of her neck.

Courtney opened her eyes, her focus on the dim streetlight outside her window.

"How's Sam?" she asked softly not exactly sure why.

"She's, uh … she's good. The baby's fine," Jason responded nonchalantly inhaling the familiar scent of vanilla. It was a lot better than that expensive shit Sam was always buying. "_But it's exotic and made in Paris, Jason. Paris!_" she would say whenever he rolled his eyes at the price.

"Great …" said Courtney. She continued to stare out the window. "Where is she again?"

Jason sighed. "Ohio."

"Oh," she replied watching the glaring lights of a car play across the glass. "Who is she visiting again?"

"Uh, why are you asking so many questions?" he asked with a laugh. And for the first time ever, she wasn't sure if that was a genuine laugh or nervous laugh.

"Excuse me," she shot back, laughing as well and shifting to face him. "I didn't know that three measly little questions was such a burden."

But instead of a playful response or even small snicker, she was met with a stare as both noticed how close they were. And without a second thought, Jason leaned into kiss her. She kissed him back and slowly draped her arms around his neck as he swiftly moved on top of her. She slid over, positioning herself perfectly underneath him. Courtney bit her lip as his kisses trailed her neck. She found her hands tugging with the hem of his shirt. Before she could raise the material, she put her hands on his chest and gently pushed him off her.

"No, Jason," she said firmly, bringing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them.

"I'm sorry," Jason said in nearly a whisper.

Courtney shot him a look. "We're both sorry," she replied. When he didn't respond she said, "Jason, you have a wife who is out of town. Not only is she carrying your child but she probably thinks that you're either at home or working late not in the bed of your ex-wife."

"We stopped, Courtney," was all he could offer.

She shook her head in disbelief. "Yeah, this time. I stopped. Other times, you've stopped but what happens when we get so caught up in the moment … in each other and suddenly we've gone too far. Suddenly we've slept together and everything isn't so innocent anymore but brought into a whole different arena for us? What happens then?"

Jason rubbed a hand his face and said nothing. Courtney continued to stare at him but looked away in frustration.

"Look … let's just … just go to sleep, okay? Seriously." she whispered reluctantly. She palmed the side of his face as he nodded with a small smile after she kissed him.

* * *

Courtney awoke, stretching out of her sleep when noticed she was alone. She turned over and ran her hand along the empty side of the bed. 

She heard no shower running. No television blaring. No breakfast cooking. Jason, and his bags, were gone.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**A/N**: Um, to clear something up –not sure if it was implied, and sorry if I did, but Courtney is NOT pregnant in this story. Oh, and, while I _am_ a Reese fan, she isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed in this story simply because of the fact that I love writing not so bright trophy wives. They're just so damn entertaining!

* * *

For days after Courtney had woken up alone, she would often wait for some word from Jason. Something to make this "thing" officially over. Of course she didn't admit to herself that she needed to hear from him. In fact, she realized how pathetic it was. But something wouldn't stop her from ever so casually requesting to leave a meeting early or even derail her plans with Carly. She just needed to hear from him. 

But after an entire month went by without even a voicemail, Courtney decided to disregard everything that had occurred. Sort of pass it off as a big mistake. She even shrugged at it. No one was perfect. Things happened and that just happened to be an unfortunate situation. At times she even imagined it was all some bizarre dream. And while she hadn't even seen Jason's face since that night, for whatever reason, she had run into Sam over a dozen times.

Out of all the people to see while jogging on the docks at 6 in the morning, she'd spot Sam just staring at the water. "In need of fresh air, that's all," the brunette would say.

Or Courtney would make a run to the market and somehow, she and Sam would both be looking at the same damn poultry. "Making dinner for Jason tonight," she announced proudly.

And nine times out of ten, the expectant mom would try to make conversation but Courtney was never up to it. In fact, for a while there she thought Sam being in her face every five minutes was some punishment from God or whoever. Something to guilt-trip her into realizing that Jason was off-limits. But she couldn't help it. And she wouldn't try to fight it. She and Jason had had something, even if it wasn't perfectly legit.

* * *

After weeks and weeks of constant begging, and even a bit of unproductive threatening, Carly had convinced her friend to leave her loft 

"Sweetie, I _realize _that this is serious," Carly said rather dramatically with a hand on Courtney's shoulder. She noted Courtney's appearance. "I _realize _that its comfortable wearing pajama's all day long and eating butter pecan ice cream and giving yourself manicures while watching _Tom and Jerry Kids _marathons but it is not normal. It's time for you to face the world again. It's time for you to de-hermit yourself, my dear."

"For the record I am perfectly fi-, wait a minute … _de-hermit _myself?" Courtney asked emphasizing the world with a large spoon she had just dug out of her bowl.

Carly looked at her in amazement. "Yeah, de-hermit yourself. You've never heard of that?"

"I don't think that's a word, Carly," Courtney grinned getting up from the couch in what seemed like weeks. She walked over to the kitchen and threw her bowl and spoon in the sink. "But, you know, you're right. There is no reason why I should be in this place any longer."

"No … I think it is a word," replied Carly. "Because de is a prefix, right? And even if it isn't a real word, you gotta admit that it's pretty clever, huh? De-hermit. Works for me."

Courtney stood at the counter just staring. "Carly, let- … you know what? Nevermind. So, anyways, what do you want to do tonight?"

"Hm …" Carly responded. She shrugged. "I hear The Bayou is pretty good."

Courtney turned up her nose. "The Bayou? Isn't that kind of expensive?"

"Who cares? It's the hottest spot in town!" Carly said waving off Courtney's statement. "I'm gonna run downstairs and get dressed. Get yourself in the shower and get ready. And I'm not talking jeans. I want stilettos and tons of black eyeliner. And hurry up!"

* * *

"Carly, seriously, I do not like this," Courtney said grabbing at the thin spaghetti straps of her black dress that continued to fall off her shoulders. She motioned at the deep v-neck and the thin silver chain that was wrapped multiple times around her neck and dangling in between her exposed cleavage. "This is not me at all. I cannot believe I let you dress me." 

"Well, if you hadn't thrown on some boring pants and an even more sleep-inducing tank maybe I wouldn't have had to lock you in the bathroom until you slipped that one. And, besides, you look great," she responded playing with Courtney's hair. "Yeah, the eyeliner is a tad on the hooker side but its okay sometimes. You look fine. Come on. Strut, now. Don't walk."

Courtney looked around uncomfortably as Carly conversed with the hostess. The restaurant was packed from wall to wall. It honestly looked as if the entire city of PC had all decided to go out to dinner at once.

As the young hostess led the two women to their table, both inched and snaked their way through the crowd, often bumping shoulders with people and even stepping on a few toes.

"Excuse you, too," Carly screamed over the music to a rather tall redhead. "I guess the world just revolves around you tonight, huh?"

"Thank God," she said finally sitting down. She noticed Courtney fidgeting with her dress. "Stop," she mouthed.

"Fine," she responded. Courtney looked at her menu and frowned. "Stuffed eggs with goat cheese and dill? Where are we?"

"Here, look on the back," said Carly flipping Courtney's menu. "I'd rather pay $12.00 for a hamburger than eat this crap. Big mistake."

"Big mistake, alright," mumbled Courtney as she saw Sonny and Reese getting up from their table.

"Oh, look at the desserts!" Carly cried oblivious to everything. "Mousse with pound cake! Oh my Lord!"

"Carly …" Courtney muttered kicking her friend under the table. Carly still didn't respond. Her eyes were too busy glazing over the thought of fudge brownies and cheesecake.

"Damn," Courtney said under her breath as she made eye contact with Reese who promptly locked arms with Sonny then pointed towards the table.

The couple walked up; Sonny's arm protectively wrapped around Reese's waist.

Carly looked up then at Courtney then back to her menu. She clenched her jaw as she continued to read.

"Hey Sonny … Reese," Courtney said politely greeting them. "Um … how was your dinner?" she asked.

"It was good," Sonny said grinning at Carly trying to ignore him.

"Fine, thank you," remarked Reese who was admiring her ring finger which was jutted out in front of her. "Honey, I think we need to get this cleaned. It's not sparkling anymore."

Carly cleared her throat loudly, still looking at the menu.

"That is a … beautiful ring, Reese," said Courtney.

Reese smiled. "Sonny got it for our one year anniversary. It was specially made in Italy," she noted shoving her hand in Courtney's face.

"One of a kind," Sonny said.

"Hey, Court, how does a banana split, _heavy on the_ _chopped nuts, _sound for dessert," Carly asked sweetly with a bright smile on her face.

Sonny laughed. "Come on," he said pulling Reese away.

"I could kill him and her," said Carly sharply as the couple headed towards the exit. "I hate that man! I hate him! I hate him! I _hate _him!"

"Calm down, Carly," Courtney said looking around. "Look, I'm going to go to the bathroom. When the waiter comes, get me a water with lemon."

She rolled her eyes as Carly screamed after her, "Hun, you're drinking something a helluva lot heavier than water with that dress on!"

* * *

After a few minutes of tugging and pulling at the little black ensemble that was about a size too small, Courtney decided to just loosen up. She spun around in the bathroom mirror and admired her hair. Carly was right. She _did _indeed look good. Courtney finally smiled at her reflection before walking out –only to see Jason with his back turned and talking on his cell. 

Her first instinct was to turn and run back into the restroom. But she decided against it, tiptoeing up behind him and tapping him on the shoulder.

"Fancy seeing you here," she remarked grinning at Jason's startled expression. He looked her up and down. "I assume Sam dragged you here. Doesn't she know you're not into the social thing?"

Jason shrugged. "We're just here having dinner."

"Really? Oh, I'm just making an observation. It's just a little weird that's all. I remember I used to practically have to _beg _you to take me Kelly's let alone some place like this. Sam must definitely have me beat in that area. Not that we're competition or anything because, clearly, she'd win," she responded nonchalantly.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Jason genuinely taken aback.

"Oh, besides you? Absolutely nothing," Courtney answered. She was astonished at her behavior but it was a tad too late to run back into a bathroom stall now. "I don't know what it is Jason but for whatever reason, you have this hold on me. No matter what's going on in my life, no matter who I'm with, everything leads back to you. _That _is what's wrong with me."

"If you're upset about me leaving that night, Courtney, then just say it," Jason answered.

"You know what? Just forget it. You did the right thing by going back to your wife. In fact, you should have never been in my bed in the first place," she said before turning to walk away. But Jason grabbed her arm and spun her back around.

"You want me to apologize, Courtney, then fine, I'm sorry," Jason said still gripping her arm.

"That's not good enough," she answered.

"What's going on here?" a voice asked behind them. The two turned to see Sam with an expression that was half puzzled, half smiling. The girl was always confused.

Courtney twisted from Jason's clutch. "Nothing much," she said eyeing Jason. "I was about to make a really stupid mistake and Jason helped me see the light. So, yeah, enjoy the rest of your dinner. I'll see you around"

* * *

Courtney got out of Carly's car, slamming the door then proceeding to run all the way upstairs to her place with Carly yelling for her to "wait up" behind her. 

Once inside, she threw herself onto the couch.

"Should I even ask what happened …" Carly began.

"Sure you can," Courtney said. "In fact, I'll clue you in on the last few months. But you probably want to get comfortable because this is going to take awhile."


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

**A/N: **Sorry, it took so long. I wanted to get this out before I went out of town for the 4th but things sorta went crazy. Anyways, here you are dolls. It's sorta short but oh well. Enjoy. Oh, and go read **Port Charles: The REAL General Hospital**, a little parody I participated in with the always fabulous Nicole (a.k.a evenangelsfall22). Our pen-name is JamminOnTheOnes … don't ask; just read!

* * *

"And when I woke up, he was gone," said Courtney. She took a sip from her third glass of red wine. "Can you believe him?" she asked Carly who hadn't said a word for the past hour as she revealed all about what happened between her and Jason. She sat up in her chair. "I know I can't", she said. 

Carly cleared her throat and kicked off her shoes. She shrugged and shook her head. "Wow … but, Sam _is _his wife."

Courtney laughed but turned serious. "Yeah, I know," she said solemnly. "But it's not right …"

"No, it is right," corrected Carly. "If anything isn't right, it was you and Jason."

"Excuse me?" Courtney asked in disbelief.

Carly sat her glass down. "Courtney, you know that Jason is married so why would you even put yourself in that position?"

Courtney rolled her eyes. "Were you not here a few months ago claiming how Sam deserved to be cheated on? _Not _that Jason has cheated on her."

"Well, I didn't mean for Jason to actually go out and do it! I mean, yes, she deserves it but … that's not what I meant. You _know_ what I meant."

"Jason didn't cheat on Sam!" Courtney yelled. "What part of 'we never slept together' do you not understand?"

"Don't talk to me like I'm a child, especially when you're the one making the juvenile choices," Carly said coldly. "Did you honestly expect Jason to continue with this? You thought he was really going to choose his child over you? You set yourself up to be hurt, you know."

"First of all, I'm not hurt, I'm angry. Second, I don't even know why I told you in the first place. I should have kept everything to myself like I intended to. It's none of your business anyway," Courtney replied.

"Oh, so now you're pissed off since I don't support or condone what you did? You know you were wrong, that's why you're lashing out. Don't come down on me just because you're angry at yourself," Carly said before getting up and grabbing her belongings then walking out the door.

Courtney crossed her arms over and chest and looked out the window for a brief moment before going over to the phone. She dialed Jason's cell phone which went straight to his voicemail. She slammed it back on its receiver then reluctantly picked it up again. She punched the numbers to the penthouse as she looked at the clock. _3:47_. She continued to dial anyway. It rang five times before Sam answered.

"Hello?" Courtney heard her say. She sounded drowsy. "Hello? Who is this?"

Courtney abruptly hung up the phone then walked over to her bedroom, sitting on her bed. She caught her reflection in her dresser mirror and turned to look at herself. She eyed the smudged black eyeliner, the tangled blonde hair, the flushed lips that were stained from old lipgloss and wine and let out a large, unsettling laugh. And that was when the tears came. They dropped from her eyes so rapidly that she didn't even bother grabbing a tissue. She just sat at the edge of her bed and allowed her chest and back to be racked with sobs until she felt herself growing sick.

Here she was, a crying mess, aching for a man she knew she couldn't have. Just when she thought she could finally lose that perfect image of Jason and finally breakaway from him to stand on her own two feet, something came flying out of nowhere to knock her back down. It was a never-ending cycle.

She got up and leaned into the mirror more. She knew what she had to do … sort of, anyway.

* * *

Courtney reached the door, balled her hand into a fist and raised it to knock –but abruptly stopped when she heard a door open behind her. 

She spun around to see Reese.

"Hello, Courtney," the brunette said pulling her silk burgundy robe even tighter around her body. "I was grabbing a cup of coffee when I heard a noise so I just came out to see what it was."

"Yeah, it was probably the elevator," Courtney replied. "It's, um … pretty late to be up drinking coffee. I take it you're a night owl."

Reese appeared baffled. "What?"

"Late at night … you drinking coffee …," Courtney paused when she got no answer. "Nevermind."

"So who are you looking for?" Reese asked.

"For me, actually," a voice answered behind her. It was Sam.

_Damn. _"Yeah, I'm here to see Sam. Have a good night," Courtney said before turning the other way.

Sam opened the door to the penthouse. "Come in," she said staring Courtney straight in the eye.

Courtney followed behind Sam uncomfortably. "I've been meaning to call you," the expectant mother said with her back pressing against the door.

"What about?" asked Courtney shrugging. She felt her cheeks burn.

"Come on, Courtney," said Sam. "I may be naïve but I'm not stupid. I know all about you and Jason."

Courtney just stared at her. She couldn't deny it nor did she want to even admit whatever it was that had happened, though it wasn't much.

"Please don't think I'm accusing you of anything because I'm not," Sam continued. "I don't mean to sound like a bitch or nag or anything but I just want you to realize that Jason isn't your husband anymore. Look, this is my first marriage. I'm young, I screw up. I may not be the best cook in the world and only God knows how petrified I am of becoming a mother but I am doing the best I can. I'm learning along the way. However, you're not making that easy. I know that you still care about Jason. I also know that he still cares about you. And we all know that he has that famous knight in shining armor complex to him but I don't want you taking advantage of that-"

"Wait a minute, what do you mean, 'taking advantage of that'?" Courtney asked.

Sam sighed deeply and ran a hand through her hair. "Courtney, you know exactly what I'm talking about. It's bad enough that you think I'm blind but the fact that you're standing here playing the ignorant card is even worse. I can only smile and nod and look away so many times before I break, alright? I try to maintain my composure for Jason because he's stressed enough but I can only stay quiet for so long. Just do me and this baby … and Jason a favor and just try to stay away."

Courtney scoffed and folded her arms over her chest. "If I want to seek out Jason for advice or help, then I'm free to do that. If I want to go out to lunch with him or speak to him while passing through town, then I will."

"Jason is a married man. His focus should be on his wife. He made vows to me not you."

"Oh, sort of like how Sonny made vows to Reese but you don't see the problem in running across the hall and crying over Jason and me?" Courtney responded. "Sonny told me all about it, Sam. You're not fooling anyone."

"Who said anything about me fooling someone?" Sam retorted. "I am telling you to back off Jason."

"And I am telling you to get over your paranoia because I will speak to Jason and I will see Jason whenever I please."

"Are you for real?" Sam asked stepping closer to Courtney. "Do you not understand the fact that I am pregnant? Jason and I have a child on the way. I have enough things on my plate right now. The last thing I need is to be stressed over you. Its not good for the baby."

"Then don't stress, Sam! You're bringing this on yourself. You're making yourself sick over this vision that you've stirred up in your head. You need to just sit and relax and prepare for your baby."

"Well, that's sort of hard when your husband's- oh." Sam stopped talking then suddenly put a hand to her stomach.

"Are you okay? …" Courtney said walking over to her.

Sam hunched down and moved to the couch. She winced again then placed another hand on her womb. "Oh my God. Something's not right. Ow …"

Courtney scurried over to the couch and sat beside Sam, who's eyes began to well up.

"I need Jason …" she said, tears beginning to stream down her face. "I need you to get me to a hospital and I need you to call Jason."


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

**A/N**: For all of you smarties out there, bear with me during this chapter –I am NOT a doctor. I have no medical knowledge except knowing when I have a cold or a headache. Some stuff will probably be wrong; other things … well, just made the hell up! I tried to do research but, hey, school ain't started yet. Its still summer. I got bored. :)

* * *

Courtney sat in the waiting room of General Hospital with her head in her hands. She had rush Sam to the E.R over an hour ago and not even one doctor had come out to update on her condition. 

Sam had cried the whole way there while rubbing her stomach and talking to the baby. She claimed that her vision was blurred and, through sniffles, she kept muttering about how she "couldn't lose the baby" and how Jason would "never look at her the same way again" if she did.

Throughout the entire ride, Courtney tried to calm her fears but Sam wouldn't hear any of it. Instead, she continued to weep.

When they finally put Sam on a stretcher and took her back into a room, Courtney hesitated to call Jason. But after sitting alone for twenty minutes waiting without any word on Sam, she reluctantly opened her cell phone and dialed his number.

The conversation was quick. She didn't explain much, only that Sam needed to be brought in and that she was crying and asking for him. Jason wasn't even in Port Charles; he was conducting business more than an hour away but promised to be there as soon as he could. She found it a bit odd at how calm he sounded on the phone but decided not to fret over it.

Dr. Meadows walked out and over to Courtney, who abruptly stood up.

"So how is she?" she asked almost afraid to.

"Where's Mr. Morgan?" the doctor asked. She took her focus away from her clipboard. "I need to speak with her husband."

"Jason is on his way … you can't give me any info on her?" Courtney asked quietly.

Dr. Meadows sighed. "She's not doing too well. That's all I'm saying," she replied before walking over to the nurse's circle.

Courtney sat back down in her chair. A few minutes later, she turned around as she heard the elevator doors open, seeing Jason walk out. He ran over to Dr. Meadows without seeing her there. The two conversed for a short time before Jason went back to Sam's room.

With Jason out of her sight, and not even noticing she was there, Courtney's first instinct was to turn, get into the elevator and run until she reached her front door. But curiosity stopped her. She really did want to stay and make sure Sam was alright –it was Jason that she didn't even want to lay eyes on.

As soon as the thought crossed her mind, she saw Jason walk out with Dr. Meadows from the back. The two made eye contact but Courtney quickly looked away and went back to the waiting area.

She pretended to be occupied with a magazine when she felt Jason walk up on her.

"What happened to Sam?" was all he said.

"How is she?" Courtney asked standing up.

"What happened to Sam," Jason repeated, more sternly this time.

Courtney shrugged then looked away. "We were … talking and suddenly she … I don't know, sort of … bent over and clutch her stomach, saying something was wrong …"

"Talking? That's all?" Jason questioned. "Because Sam told Dr. Meadow's that you two were arguing. She said you were yelling at her."

"I mean, we weren't exactly talking and we weren't exactly arguing. She was screaming at me and saying all of these things and … look, its not like I meant to get her riled up or anything, Jason. It just happened," she answered genuinely apologetic. "I didn't mean for her to get hurt."

"I know you didn't," Jason said loosening up. "But she is. Her blood pressure is high and they may have to induce her labor."

Courtney reached out to him and tried to pull him closer but he wouldn't move. "I'm so sorry, Jason."

"She's not due until months from now. Why were you at the penthouse anyway," he said.

Courtney was taken aback. She wasn't sure if he was purposely trying to make her feel awful because if he was, he was doing a damn good job. Since when did this sudden animosity rise between them? Why couldn't he just turn to her for support and not gripe? If anything, she should be the one gripe after everything he had put her through these past couple of months.

Instead, he stood there, waiting for an answer.

Courtney bit her lip. "I came to see you. I was talking to Reese, Sam opened the door and we started talking and the next thing I knew, Jason, I was rushing her to the hospital. You don't think I did this on purpose do you? You can't honestly think that I would endanger the lives of your wife and unborn child do you?"

Jason looked away. "I don't know what to think. All I know is that my wife is in some back room somewhere and they're talking about putting her through labor to deliver a child that's not supposed to be born yet."

Before Courtney could speak, Bobbie rushed out and ran over. "Sam's unconscious," she announced.

"Wait. She was fine just a few minutes ago," Jason said.

Courtney closed her eyes in distress.

"She's not doing too well, Jason," Bobbie said slowly. "Sam just had what you call an Eclamptic Seizure. They're rare and spontaneous but we have to take care of her properly. We're moving her to ICU." With that said, she turned and walked away.

Jason slowly turned back to Courtney.

"Jason, I-", she began. But he cut her off.

"There's nothing you can say," he whispered looking into her eyes. "Just go home, Courtney."

* * *

Precisely two weeks had past since Courtney had brought Sam into GH. She hadn't gone to visit nor had she called over to the penthouse to get an update. Instead, she went to the one person who probably knew how Sam was doing better than Sam herself and the entire staff: Carly. 

"The seizure was minor. She was in a coma for a three days but she's up now. The baby is doing perfectly okay. She was kicking for a little while on Tuesday then had the hiccups on Thursday. It was the cutest thing and all the nurses came to feel her stomach, which supposedly has only a few stretch marks because she has Jason drive forty minutes just to get this expensive cream for her. Speaking of husband dearest, Jason's been by her side the whole time –even sleeping in her room. Get this, he's even been reading to her. Go figure. Anyways, she's also demanding water with lemon to go with her meals and vitamins," Carly said as the two women sat on the floor across from one another in the hallway of their building. She looked at Courtney's apprehensive expression. "Oh, hun, she's fine. Don't worry."

"How can I not worry? She just woke up, what, two days ago? Carly, she's still in the hospital. I put her there!" Courtney responded.

"So you shouldn't have gone to the penthouse but Sam shouldn't have been in your face either. _But _Sam _is _pregnant and things happen to pregnant women. Hell, I was kidnapped, electrocuted, fell through ice … Courtney, I was _shot _while giving birth! Things happen. The important thing is that she's okay," Carly said gently nudging Courtney's foot with her own.

She sighed. "Maybe I should go over to the penthouse …"

"No!" Carly nearly choking on her potato chip. "Don't do that! Do not put yourself back in that position –no pun, intended. I swear."

Courtney rolled her eyes before snatching the bag from Carly. "I'll ignore that. But, I just … I just want to check in. I mean, I know Sam isn't home yet but I still want to hear about her from Jason."

Carly smirked before biting into a chocolate donut. "No … you just want to hear from Jason. Look, for once in your life, just make me happy and take my advice.

But Courtney didn't. Instead, two hours after her friend decided she needed to lay down for a nap; Courtney got up and drove straight to Jason's penthouse.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

**A/N: **Does anyone else shed a tear when Kit's team wins the World Series at the end of _A League of Their Own_? Just wondering … oh, by the way, you probably don't want the parentals around you while reading this chapter …

* * *

Courtney drove straight to Jason and Sam's penthouse full speed, stop signs and red lights be damned … well, sure she was only going 5 mph over the speed limit and technically, she didn't blow through red lights, she just ignored yellow ones. Still, she was feeling a little bold. 

During the ride, her concern for Sam turned into bitterness toward Jason. How dare he try and make her feel guilty. She had no control over what happened to Sam. If anything, he should be thanking her for being there. What is Sam had collapsed or something? She had practically saved that woman and that little girl.

Courtney raced up to the penthouse and knocked firmly on the door. When Jason didn't answer, she knocked rapidly again, even louder. Who cared if Reese was up drinking coffee and listening by the door? Screw her and her stupid specially-made ring.

Jason answered, his cell-phone attached to his ear. Courtney let herself in without even looking at him.

"We need to talk," she announced obnoxiously ignoring the fact that he was on the phone. He held up a hand to tell her to wait until he was done but she disregarded it. "We need to talk," she repeated, louder this time.

Jason ended his conversation and threw his phone down. It slid across the table and fell onto the floor.

Courtney stared at it before speaking up. "You know, I came over here to see how Sam was. I really did. I wanted to get an update on her, maybe get her room number to bring her flowers or visit but as I got on the elevator, I remembered our little conversation in the hospital. I remembered you blatantly trying to make me feel bad. Was there any reason for that?"

Jason looked at her incredulously. "You came over here-"

"I came over here to talk to you Jason," she interrupted, her voice rising a bit. "God, you act like I did this on purpose! What happened to Sam wasn't my fault. In actuality, I think I deserve a little gratitude. After all, I got her to the hospital. I probably saved her life, not to mention your baby's."

Jason shrugged inching closer to her. "So, why are you telling me all this? Why not go to Sam?"

Courtney bit her lip. "Because I don't care about Sam," she whispered.

And suddenly, his lips crashed down unto hers and she accepted the kiss fully and completely. Something about this kiss was different. It was much more intense, more serious. The kind of kiss that would end up with them wrapped in each other's arms, basking, or possibly regretting, in the afterglow. But the outcome didn't matter to her, or him, right now. They just wanted one another.

She pulled back from him for just a second and turned off the next to the couch, the only source of light in the room. She slowly unbuttoned her shirt, never taking her eyes off of him. She smiled seductively as she finished the last button and let out a small laugh as he rushed to peel the shirt off of her. It fell at her feet and she wrapped her arms back around his neck and gently pulled the both of them to the floor, where she positioned herself perfectly underneath him.

Breaking the kisses for just a second, he pulled his shirt over his head and as his lean body fell into hers, she shivered as she felt their bare skin touch. It had been so long and she relished in the fact that she hadn't forgotten just how good it felt to be intimate with Jason Morgan. She felt his mouth eagerly graze her neck and move down to the small exposure of cleavage peeking out over her black bra, which he removed before doing the same to her pants. In nothing but her lacy bra and matching panties, she sat back on her elbows, staring at him with a sly grin on her face, letting him take in every single curve. She wanted him to realize exactly what he didn't have with Sam.

She then moved into him and flipped them over, sitting on top of him. She began to place kisses down his chest and towards his waist, letting her teeth nibble over his skin every now and then. When she came to the top of his jeans, she slowly unbuttoned then unzipped them and had them removed within seconds. In that moment, they both realized there was no turning back.

As he regained his spot on top of her, she froze. "No. Uh-uh," she said in a sharp tone. Her outburst received a look of confusion from Jason. "Take it off," she whispered sharply almost laughing at the authority in her voice. She beckoned at his wedding ring. Jason quickly shook his head with a small laugh and removed it. As he went to slide it under the couch, she snatched it from him, placing it on her thumb. She smiled to herself, liking the fact that he still couldn't say no to her.

Banishing whatever thoughts he was thinking, he took his hands and slowly inched them down to her waist. Feeling reluctant and eager all at once, he steadily removed her underwear. She continued to stare at him as she kicked the flimsy material off with a smirk on her face, placing her hands on his own underwear and removing them.

She knew she should have asked him to stop. She knew that would have been the right thing to do. But something in her wouldn't allow her conscience to speak. It was okay …right? It sure felt right. But, wasn't she becoming the exact same thing she and Carly spit at Sam about? "But this is different", she told herself. Wasn't it? Besides, what was that Carly was always saying how life is just a party and you should always RSVP to every invitation you got?

As he took in perfect, naked form, a wave of guilt fell over his body. This was wrong and he knew it. But something about this woman always threw his senses out the window. But since when did he ever think straight when it came to Courtney? He admitted time and time again how selfish he was. He knew that. Courtney knew that. They couldn't help it if they were drawn to one another. Besides, what was that Carly was always saying about how everyone is allowed 'Oh, what the hell' moments?

Courtney sighed as Jason continued to move his mouth over her leaving no place left unmarked. Her hands went to his hair, raking her fingers through it and motioning for him to move even lower. As she did, she immediately regretted it, clenching her eyes shut as his tongue made its way across her flesh, reacquainting itself with her taste. She remembered that she always hated this part. The beckoning of it; the teasing. He always seemed to taunt her in some way or another, whether he really meant to or not. She curved her thin hips as, well, expected, then let out a routine moan.

He looked up at her expecting her usual lazy smile. Instead she scratched her eyebrow and focused on him with her head cocked to her side, a grin on her face. He was surprised. He remembered that she was usually smiling, giggling even, and covering her mouth trying to muffle the laughs so she wouldn't seem too "immature" during such a thing. But Courtney had changed. And while he always found her former shyness during sex amusing, he had no idea when she had picked up this new haughty stance towards it, not that he necessarily cared or minded –he loved it.

He eased his way back up her body, leaving kisses here and there. She then positioned herself underneath him, palming his face and desperately eager for him. Taking a deep breath, Jason pushed, slowly entering her then quickly withdrawing. There was no giggling this time, or some sarcastic remark, instead Courtney moved her hand to his lower back, silently requesting that he sink back into her, deeper this time.

With one slight push, Jason slide into her completely. Courtney panted heavily, adjusting around him. She placed her hands on his shoulders, feeling his muscles contract under them as he found their old, familiar rhythm. She dug her fingers into his back, marking her place on him somewhat hoping Sam would notice the little nicks.

A part of her wanted to scream his name out, or at least yell a 'Take that Carly!' but Courtney kept quiet except for the slight cries that escaped her flushed, swollen lips.

She dug her nails even deeper into Jason as he gave one last powerful thrust, both of them shivering as they peaked together. His body fell onto hers and she cradled her head in the crook of his damp neck and shoulder, kissing whatever exposed skin she could find with her mouth.

Jason lifted himself up then reached up to the couch and pull down the cover that sat on top. Wrapping Courtney and himself in it, he smoothed out the damp tresses on her forehead. They stared at one another for a second or two, trying to grasp what just happened. Instead of feeling anything, she wanted to be in his arms. But as she felt herself beginning to lean into him, she abruptly sat up. This wasn't love-making … it was just sex –and she knew the difference far too well. He wanted it; she needed it so it was a win-win situation. They both won. But she wouldn't let it go any further. She wouldn't allow her emotions to get involved. Distraught, she began to glide her hands across the floor.

"Where … where are my clothes?" Courtney asked tucking her damp, matted hair behind her ears. The room was black except for the early glow of the morning starting to peek through the blinds. Still she couldn't see a thing in front of her. When she finally located her clothing, Jason began to do the same. She felt his eyes on her. And, after she slid her arms through her shirt, she turned around to face him.

"I …" she began. He cut her off. Walking up to her, he began to button up her shirt. "You don't have to say anything," he responded. She wanted to. But she couldn't think of anything to say. What do you say in a situation like this? What did Sam say to Sonny after they first screwed one another? It didn't matter.

"I'll, uh, … I'll see you later," she said running to the door and letting herself out. Courtney ran all the way to her car, opened the door, slid in and cried until the sun was fully up.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

**A/N**: Can I get a 'hell yeah' for filler chapters? Alright, I'll admit it. I've had writer's block more times than Sam has yelled at Jason. This chapter doesn't give you MUCH _but_ it moves us along. I hope you enjoy it –well, at least a sentence or two …

* * *

"Okay, hun, you are positively glowing," Carly said as she watched Courtney scurry throughout the kitchen. The two were in Carly's apartment for some much needed "gossip time" as the brunette put it. "What is going on with you?" 

"You expect us to make dinner but you have nothing but Cheez-Its, Famous Amos Cookies, vanilla pudding, other crap and hard liquor," Courtney said swiftly ignoring the comment.

If Courtney had shown any resentment about her little rendezvous with Jason, such as, oh, crying in her car for a few hours –she was over it. In the weeks that passed since that night in the penthouse, Courtney had come to grips with what had happened –and accepted it.

She didn't care that she and Jason had talked on the phone every night into the wee morning or that she had gone over to the penthouse about 1,2 or 5 times.

Not that she felt it was right or even tried to justify her behavior –_their _behavior but it had happened and, to be honest, she was enjoying this "oh what the hell" stance.

"Ooh, sounds good to me!" Carly said blowing on her toes she had just painted a bright red. "Now, stop ignoring my comment and dish."

Courtney sighed as she poured herself a glass of water. Carly frowned at the choice, looking at her own tall glass of lemonade spiked with a few shots of Vodka. She picked it up and sipped it as Courtney walked over and sat in her leather chair.

She stared at Courtney who had had a smile plastered on her face since arriving –three hours ago.

"What?" she asked, catching Carly staring. She rolled her eyes. "Do we always have to talk about me and my love life?"

Carly shrugged. "Okay, we'll talk about mine –I haven't had sex in two years, four months and three days, how about you?"

"Uh … we're not discussing this," Courtney said, nervously picking up a magazine. She pretended to leaf through it as Carly got up and sat at her feet. She looked up into Courtney's eyes, a sly grin spreading over her face.

"Come on, Court. When was the last time you had sex?"

"We're not discussing this," Courtney repeated turning back to the magazine.

"It's just us girls, here. No one's around. Spill. We've talked about more personal things you know … like that time you and Jason were in that pool at that really nice hotel in Barbados and you decided that since it was his birthday you were gonna-"

"Carly, shut up!" Courtney screamed. "God, just stop, alright? You wanna know so badly then fine. You know that restaurant owner you tried to set me up with? I slept with him. Once and it was horrible. Happy now?"

Carly slowly got up and put her hands on her hips. "You're lying," she said simply. "I know you Courtney. You're definitely lying. You're seeing someone … and whoever it is, you don't want me to know about him."

Walking over to the kitchen, she added more liquor to her drink. She tasted it then smiled satisfactorily. "This mystery man … who could it be? I'm not buying Mr. Restaurant Owner. The guy with the Volvo? No, we both decided that men shouldn't wear lavender polo shirts. Is it …" Carly gasped then sat her drink down. "Tell me it isn't … you're not sleeping with …"

Courtney froze. She stopped herself from tapping her foot like she usually did when she felt uneasy. She nonchalantly flipped the page.

"You're not sleeping with Jax are you?" Carly said shaking her head with her eyes closed.

Courtney smiled to herself. "Nope," she said casually. She wanted to laugh at the mere thought of comparing the two. Jason … Jax. She turned to another page. "Definitely not Jax."

"Well, I know it's not Jason, Courtney, so who is it?" Carly asked walking back to her spot on the couch.

Courtney closed the magazine. "Has it ever occurred to you that I'm not sleeping with anyone? Maybe I'm just having a good day or week."

Her friend smirked. "Sure. Whatever. I'll find out sooner or later and get all the sordid details. Look, what are you cooking?"

Courtney laughed. "Have you _seen _your fridge? What am I supposed to whip up? Cheetos a la jelly donut? Your grocery skills are ridiculous."

"Hey now, don't make fun of my food. You sound like Sonny."

"Don't ever say that again," Courtney responded laughing. "We could get take out from Kelly's?"

"Um … uh-uh. I'd rather go sit down. I'm sick of this place," Carly replied. "But let my toes dry first."

* * *

As soon as Carly opened the door to Kelly's, Courtney tensed up. She tugged at Carly's jacket. 

"On second thought, let's leave. We can go to Metro Court and get a free meal," Courtney said.

Carly followed Courtney's eyes and sighed loudly. Her eyes caught contact with Sam's who was sitting with Jason, who had his back turned to the door.

Sam waved them over. Carly groaned. "Just act like we don't see them," she said hurrying to turn back towards the door and walk out.

"Too late," Courtney said walking over and pulling Carly with her.

"Hey guys!" Sam said cheerfully. "Pull up some chairs."

Carly grabbed one and rushed to sit next to Jason but Courtney beat her to it. She stomped her foot and muttered a curse word as she sat down next to Sam.

Courtney rested her chin in her hands. "Hi Jason."

He looked up at her from his food and she smiled. "How are you?" she asked politely.

Sam stared at her then back at Jason waiting for his answer. "I'm good," he replied.

"That's great," Courtney said. She turned to Sam. "And you? Are you feeling any better?"

Sam looked at Jason before turning back to Courtney. "I'm good. And thank you so much. I never got a chance to express my gratitude towards you for driving me to the hospital that night. I don't know what would have happened to my baby and me if you hadn't been there."

"No problem," Courtney replied. She watched as Carly silently mocked Sam then smiling sweetly when Jason looked at her.

His phone rang. "I'm gonna take this outside," he said, getting up and walking out.

Courtney smirked as Carly shot a curious look at her.

"You know what?" said Courtney said standing up. "I'm gonna go say hi to my dad. I'll be back in a minute."

She then got up, walked towards the counter into the kitchen –and then straight out the back exit.

She looked around and smiled as she spotted Jason on his phone. Running up to him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and grinned as he turned towards her, still on the phone.

Courtney patiently waited as he ended his conversation. When he slammed his phone shut, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down for a kiss, her lips smiling against his.

"Sorta surprised to see Sam in Kelly's," Courtney said laughing as she pulled back. "Didn't think she touched anything under $100.00."

Jason smiled. "What'd I tell you about talking about my wife?"

Courtney let out another laugh. "I was merely making an observation," she answered sweetly. "Anyways, I don't really want to talk about Sam, right now. I've been thinking. And, you know, Sam's not due anytime soon. I don't have any near future obligations so … what do you say about us going away for a little while? Just the two of us?"


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

**A/N**: -Evil grin- I had two more pages with this update but took them out, deciding to put them with the next chapter. I'm a sweet gal but I can't spoil you _too_ much. Oh, and a very special thanks to Jewel for giving me my 100th review! I don't even know you and you totally made my internet day! And even more thanks to my other online bestest, Miss Nicole (evenangelsfall22) for recommending this fic _to _Jewel. Without you I wouldn't have my 100th review! You know you're like, wow, right? So thanks to you both –and, of course, to everyone else who takes the time to read. Hope you enjoy the chapter.

* * *

Much to Courtney's surprise, Jason had agreed to get away from Port Charles with her a few days. And while he couldn't guarantee how long they'd actually get to stay since business was unpredictable, he promised her they'd at least try. Whether it was some exotic place in the Caribbean or just spending a few days relaxing in some remote town, he swore up and down that they'd get away. 

At first, he was reluctant, worrying about Sam. But Courtney assured his fears, making sure that he kept in mind that Sam was nowhere near her due date, and not only that, but Dr. Meadow's gave her a clean bill of health after the hospital stay. A few days without her husband certainly wouldn't do any harm. So after much reasoning on her half, she had finally convinced him.

Admittedly, she herself began to feel a bit reluctant when she opened the empty suitcase and placed it in front of her bed. She felt a small pang in the pit of her stomach as she caught herself trying to pick out her best lingerie. She even hesitated to throw in Jason's favorite perfume of hers simply because she knew that this wasn't helping their situation. Instead, she was fostering it. But the real question was if she even wanted to set things right. Surely Jason didn't or. Or at least he didn't seem to. He never mentioned Sam when he was with her or even the baby for that matter. And since he never brought it up then why should she?

Courtney slammed the lid shut, securing it with the lock. She hesitated to move it; somewhat hoping that Jason would call and cancel. For a second, she wanted to believe that he was the one suggesting the getaway but it was her who had been the bold one. It wasn't Jason. He wasn't like that at all. When she felt her uncertainty getting the best of her, she firmly picked up her luggage and placed it next to the door.

"This is right," she told herself as soon as her phone rang. She walked over and picked it up.

"Hello? Jason! Hey …" she greeted, silently praying her wish about him canceling wouldn't come true.

"Look," he started. "I'm sort of tied up over here. I have some business to take care of and its taking a little longer than expected."

"So …"

"So, why don't you get on the flight and I'll take a later one," Jason said.

"But, we haven't even decided where we were going," Courtney said a bit disappointed. "Okay. Fine. I'll call you when I arrive. I'll see you later. Bye."

She walked over to the couch and looked at the keys besides her purse. She smiled when she saw that she had Jason's spare keychain, remembering that she playfully slid them off his desk the last time she was over at the penthouse. He didn't even notice they were gone until days later which made it even funnier to her. She decided in that exact moment she no longer wanted to head to some fancy island. She was so damn sick of those kinds of places. She had had enough of it while she was married to Jason. Jax had shown her more exclusive spots. Shopping in Greece, fancy dinners in Monaco. Courtney had experienced all of it –except the one spot she was curious about the most.

* * *

Courtney opened the double doors of the residence and looked around in awe. Every single painting, figurine and piece of furniture was put together and matched flawlessly. It was as if a professional designer had been hired. It was beautiful. It was inspiring … it was the beach house Sam had begged Jason for in Florida. 

The blonde smiled as she plopped down on the couch, inhaling the scent of fresh butter-like leather. She placed her feet on the wooden coffee table and wondered how long it took Sam to beg for this place.

_Must have cost well over $1,000,000_, Courtney thought to herself. She got up and walked aimless through the hallway, finding the spotless kitchen which was outfitted in sparkling copper equipment. She poured herself some water in an expensive looking champagne glass and looked out the window which was a view of the back.

She sighed at the tiny perfectly still yacht which was docked and tied up with ropes. She rolled her eyes, thinking of Jax and his fondness for them. But since when did Jason ever care for yachts?

Sick of thinking about the material things that Sam possessed, Courtney found herself wondering throughout the house again often running her hands along the large antique picture frames that graced the walls and even bending down once or twice to feel just how soft the carpet was. She paused as she walked past a bedroom, then turning to go back into it.

The room seemed bigger than her entire loft. It had one king-sized bed that was covered in cream colored bedding, a dark brown over-sized armoire and carpet so deep, you could twist an ankle in it. It had to be the master suite. Courtney's speculation was confirmed when she walked further into the room, spotting a few photos of Jason and Sam. The first being a pregnant Sam on the penthouse couch. Her hair was pinned up, both hands were to her stomach and she was smiling rather brightly. The second was Jason and Sam. She was sitting on his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck and the third, a large framed picture of them on their wedding day.

Courtney picked it up and stared at it. A stoic Jason and a blissful Sam faced one another, his hand protectively on her back, one of hers on his chest. Her veil was long and thin and nearly transparent, secured by a diamond tiara. The backdrop of the photo just a beautiful array of cream flowers and green garnish.

Courtney thought back to that day and was almost positive she remembered looking on as the newlyweds posed for photos, Sam begging Jason for "just one more" as she giggled. However, back then, she was genuinely pleased for the couple. Now, she couldn't even describe what she felt when she saw the picture. Whatever it was, she knew it wasn't happiness.

* * *

Seven hours had past since she had arrived. Jason wasn't answering his cell phone; instead it went straight to voicemail. She left one message, telling him where she was and trying her hardest not to sound irritated. 

It was growing dark outside and all she heard were the sounds of laughter and water splashing from the lake and Maury Povich going, "You are _not _the father," from the television she sat in front of that was placed in some spare guestroom out of the five that helped complete the house. Courtney decided to call Jason once again but hung up before her fingers pressed the last number.

She put the phone back on its receiver, settling on the fact that if Jason said he was going to show up, then he was going to show up. Courtney slipped into the shower, hoping a call from him would show up on her cell by the time she was finished but there wasn't. She debated which bed to get into. As she pulled on a short black gown, she smiled to herself then briskly walked into the master bedroom. She grabbed hold of the soft comforter and sheets, pulled them back then slid under them without a single ounce of reluctance. She felt even better when, a couple of hours later, a pair of arms wrapped around her and held on tight.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

**A/N**: If I hear Carrie Underwood singing about a damn Kit-Kat bar ONE MORE TIME … ah, crap, okay. I'll get right to it. I _could _blame the length between this update and the last one on my fabulous bout with Pneumonia (monetary sentiments would be appreciated), but since my illness is so yesterday, I'll just admit that the evil lazy ass in me took over. I am SO sorry. I really am. I even turned down a night of clubbing on my friend's birthday to get this update out. FORGIVE ME READERS, FOR I HAVE SINNED!

* * *

Courtney stirred in her sleep then opened her eyes as the sun burned across them. She smiled, inhaling Jason's familiar cologne that had overwhelmed the sheets and eventually her own skin. She turned over then frowned when she realized she was in a bed alone. She knew she wasn't dreaming when she felt him get into bed with her. She definitely knew she wasn't dreaming that _that _had happened last night. She couldn't have been. Or maybe it was just some bizarre fantasy? But her fears were calmed when she was lured downstairs by the smell of food cooking. 

She walked for what seemed like a mile until she reached the kitchen. Courtney smiled as she watched Jason hovering over the stove, struggling to place pancakes on a plate. She let out a laugh as he spun around.

"Nice work," she said walking over to him. "You let me wake up alone and then you show up rather late though I did appreciate the apology."

Jason let out a laugh as she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him towards her and kissing him. She smiled before pulling back.

"Is that better," he asked.

Courtney looked up to the ceiling then thought for a second. "Nope, but there's time for that later on." Before Jason could respond, Courtney placed herself at the wooden island that sat in the middle of the large kitchen. She ran her hands along the marble countertop hard enough to smudge it. She spelled her name with her index finger as she said, "This is a pretty nice place."

When Jason responded with a mere shrug, she continued. "What made Sam want a house out here?"

Jason made his way over and sat down next to her. "Uh, we were on vacation and she … decided she wanted a house."

Courtney laughed. "You can't be serious. Come on, Jason, I want details. Look at this place. This isn't just a house. It's … a castle, practically. I have yet to see one ugly chair or a really bad painting. It's perfect."

"You sound like you want the place," Jason replied.

Courtney smiled, a bit taken aback. For the first time ever, she wasn't sure if he was joking or if he was dead serious.

"No …" she answered slowly digging her fork into the food in front of her. "I just wanted to know that's all." As she said that, Jason's cell rang and without hesitating, he went to reach for it, clearly annoyed.

As he went to greet the caller, the doorbell rang. Before Jason could stop Courtney from jumping out of her seat, which he fully intended to, she scrambled out of the kitchen anyway, scurrying to the door.

She opened it to a young woman with black shoulder length hair. Her smile somewhat faded when she saw Courtney.

"Hi … is Sam here?" she asked looking Courtney up and down.

Courtney shrugged. "Nope," was all she offered.

"Do you know when she'll be back?" the woman responded.

"I'm not sure. Sam's not in town," Courtney sighed. "She's at home in New York."

"Oh … I just saw lights on last night and thought that she and Jason were vacationing so I decided to stop by and visit."

"Oh, Jason's here but Sam isn't," Courtney answered. She watched as the woman looked her up and down then turned her focus away, looking into the living room. Her gaze met Courtney's as a small, tight smile appeared on her face.

"Oh … well, can you let Sam know that I stopped by?" the woman asked.

Courtney returned the false grin. "I sure will," she said sweetly before closing the door.

"How rude," she said to herself before walking into the kitchen. Something about the dark haired woman didn't sit with her too well.

"Who was that at the door?" Jason asked.

Courtney shrugged in response. "Just someone," she said still a bit uneasy when she felt herself yearning to leave. She looked down at the silver band that was placed on her thumb. Jason's wedding band. She hadn't taken it off since that night in the loft.

Looking around the room, she suddenly felt suffocated –and even the thought of she and Jason in bed couldn't keep her. "Hey, why don't we go out for a little while? You know, maybe go walk around, look in a few shops and later on we can grab lunch and maybe even dinner if we're still out."

When Jason nodded in agreement she smiled. "Great. I'll go get ready."

* * *

After two hours and purchases amounting to exactly $373.48, Courtney still couldn't get enough of the little town Sam had found. There were tiny restaurants and boutiques and markets and everything else that Port Charles didn't have. As much as she loathed the woman, she had to give it to Sam. The house, the location, everything was perfect. But still, she wanted someone to smack her as she felt herself falling it love with the tiny place. 

She grabbed her big, dark sunglasses and slid them on top of her head as she looked up at the sign. _Nicole's Jewelry Hut_. She peeked in the window and squealed.

"Oh my God. Jason, I have to go in there. All I did was look in the window and I already saw something," Courtney said pulling him inside the store.

"What else do you need? We've been shopping all day," Jason groaned.

"Look, I swear we can grab something to eat after this," she said still not wanting to go back to the house.

"You said that five stores ago," Jason replied dryly.

Courtney rolled her eyes. "Well, I am on vacation … sort of and I want to get a few souvenirs and yes jewelry and jeans and shoes are all souvenirs. Key chains are highly overrated, you know." When Jason responded with nothing but a stare, Courtney sighed heavily. "That was a joke. Anyways, look, why don't you … go to that little restaurant we passed walking up here? The little one next to the pier? When I'm done in here, I'll come meet you."

Jason exhaled loudly before walking off. "Thanks … love you … really," she called after him.

She walked in and immediately looked around. She picked up a bracelet that had pieces of silver and precious stones intertwined and decided she would buy it for Carly. She then retrieved a pair of matching earrings for her best friend along with a thin, silver anklet for herself.

Courtney walked up to the cashier, gently placing the jewelry on the counter. She smiled at the elderly woman who began to scan her items.

"Nanny?" the cashier asked as Courtney began to dig for her wallet.

She looked up. "Excuse me?"

"Your total is $234.75" the woman responded taking Courtney's credit card. "And I asked if you were the nanny."

"The nanny? Whose nanny?" Courtney asked frustrated and wondering why some looney had been hired for such a nice place. She bent over to sign the receipt.

"The Morgan's nanny," the woman replied. Courtney's head shot up. "I saw you with Mr. Morgan. I assumed you were their new nanny. I didn't know his wife had the baby. What did they name her? I know Mrs. Morgan must be delighted."

"_Mrs. Morgan_ hasn't delivered yet," Courtney answered through her teeth. She slid her sunglasses back on and snatched her bag from the counter before walking out.

As Courtney found her way to the restaurant, she tried to inhale then exhale a few times to calm herself down. She couldn't understand why she had gotten so worked up over the cashier … or their neighbor. It was typical wasn't? Expected, right? She told herself that as she walked in and spotted Jason at a table.

She tried to force a smile as she sat down but couldn't hide her irritation for long.

"What's wrong?" Jason asked.

Courtney sighed. "Nothing, really. Just this woman in-"

She stopped when a waitress walked over a placed a large salad in front of her. She then looked up at Jason who had a slight smile on his face, clearly pleased with himself.

"A grilled chicken salad. Nice. Who are you? Sonny?" she responded. The two shared a short laugh before hers suddenly faded.

"Apparently, the old lady in the jewelry store thinks I'm the nanny to the newest addition to the Morgan clan," Courtney said dryly digging into her salad.

Jason shrugged. "Just ignore it," he replied which earned him a scoff from Courtney.

"Ignore it? Every single place we went in today, it's as if all eyes were on us … on me. I could feel them staring, Jason. God, does everyone in this town know you and Sam?"

"It's a small place," was all he offered. Courtney looked at him in disbelief. She tried to turn back to her salad but was suddenly uninterested in it. In fact, she felt herself disgusted with it, feeling the aroma consume her. She ended up pushing the plate away.

"Hey. Are you okay?" Jason asked, reaching a concerned hand over to Courtney.

She shook her head and motioned towards the food. "I don't know … I can't eat that."

"You want to order something else?"

"No … no," Courtney answered, waving off the suggestion. "My head is …"

"Well, maybe you need to eat then," Jason replied.

"Ugh. No, I don't even want to think of food right now. Can we just leave?" she asked quietly.

Jason nodded as he called the waitress over.

* * *

Courtney placed herself on the couch, thanking Jason as her brought her a glass of water. 

"Feel any better?" he asked.

She gave him a faint smile. "Honestly? No. And it's not just the food. I don't know what happened with that but it's this place too. The people in this town. I'm pretty sure they're not thinking that I'm your little sister visiting you for a few days. I shouldn't have come here. I had no right to."

"Courtney, I told you to just ignore them-"

"How can I just ignore them? Jason, people _know _you here. And not just you but you're wife as well. I don't think I have to spell it out for you," she answered.

"Well what did you expect coming here, Courtney?" Jason asked. "There were a million other places to go and for some reason, you chose to come here-"

"And I just admitted how wrong I was in coming here …"

"Well, then you can't be mad if people say something to you or mistake you for someone else," Jason said getting up. "People know Sam and me in this town and you just have to-"

"I'm going back home," Courtney interrupted abruptly. "I'm going upstairs to pack my stuff. I'm going back to PC." She turned and walked out of the room as Jason tried calling after her.

As she reached the master bedroom and began throwing everything she could get her hands on into her suitcase, she sighed in frustration. This wasn't the way it was supposed to go. She was supposed to get to the house, have a good laugh with Jason over it, venture out into town every now and then and of course, stay inside too. But nothing had gone as planned except the stay in part but she truly meant for this vacation or whatever it was called to be more than her and Jason in bed. She had to admit to herself that she wanted him in more than a physical sense. She wanted him to need her and she didn't get that from him. That was his wife's duty.

Courtney looked over to the picture of the couple and threw her hand across the table, allowing two of the frames to collapse then fall to the ground, their glass shattering into a million pieces.

"Well, I'll be damned," she said as she noticed that the one picture still standing was Jason and Sam on their wedding day.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

**A/N**: Oh, snap! It's finally here. Now don't anyone mention the words: SINS OF THE SOUL to me for a very long time. Just kidding, of course :_flails arms like Sam_: Yes, I know, I know. It took forever to get this update out. I'm sorry for the wait. Hope you like it. And as always, ignore me on this part. I'm very much aware of that fact that I'm as off my rocker as Carly is right now.

* * *

Courtney had been home from Florida for a full week and had yet to hear from Jason. She was positive that he would try to stop her from packing. When he didn't, she told herself that he would show up at the airport. But he hadn't. 

So as she sat alone on her couch, surprisingly bored with the newest issue of _Cosmopolitan_ and sipping her third –and last, cup of tea, she tried telling herself that this was Jason she was dealing with and, well, he had his own way of dealing. And while his stern stance on most things never bothered her in the past, she couldn't help but to be frustrated.

She wondered what he was doing at that exact moment. Was he on the docks conducting business? Accepting orders on a new "shipment"? Or was he at home with Sam? Were they laughing over baby names? Eating take-out from Kelly's? Courtney was curious –and she shouldn't have been.

A hard knock came from the floor. She peered down to the hardwood and the thud came again, twice this time. It only meant one thing: Carly was home and in need of food.

Courtney got up and grabbed her broom. She turned it upside down and slammed the tip of the handle against the floor once. A few minutes passed before Carly responded with two knocks. Courtney sighed then threw herself on her bed closing her eyes.

Within seconds Carly barged in. "You've got nothing?" she asked.

"Nothing," Courtney responded, her eyes still closed. She heard Carly make her way to the fridge followed by the sound of a cabinet opening.

"Oh!" she heard her friend say. "Peanut butter and jelly. This'll do."

Carly retrieved the proper silverware then hurried to find some bread.

"You want a sandwich, Courtney?" she called out.

"No," Courtney muttered faced down on her pillow. The last thing she needed was some sticky sandwich.

Carly poured herself a glass of milk then walked into the room, placing herself on the edge of the bed.

"What's wrong?" she asked biting down into her sandwich.

"I don't feel well," Courtney answered still faced down, her answer muffled.

"Anything I do to help? Manicure? Some delicious gossip? You know, I heard Alexis-" Carly replied, ignoring the crumbs that spilled from her plate.

"No," Courtney said cutting her off.

"Well, my colorist swore that she saw Reese at-"

"No, Carly"

"Maybe we should go for a run or something. You know, it'll give you energy. Pep!"

"No."

"_Okay_, usually a conversation involves two people corresponding back and forth. These little one word answers aren't gonna cut it," Carly responded.

Courtney sat up. "Hi, Carly. I don't feel well. Thank you were offering a manicure and giving me the latest dish on Alexis and Reese. Oh, and sorry, I don't feel like running. Satisfied?"

Carly grinned weakly. "Eh, not really but what can you do? But, really, are you okay? Do you need anything?"

When Courtney shook her head, Carly stood up, clearing her dishes. "Well, I wish I could tell you I came up here for something else other than just cleaning out your fridge but I'd be lying. _So_," she said cleaning the remaining silverware in the sink, "I'll just be going …downstairs … to my lonely apartment … and watch re-runs of _Mama's Family _all by myself. I mean, don't you dare try to stop me."

"I swear we'll do something later," Courtney laughed.

"Fine." Waving to Courtney, she walked over to the door and opened it, just as Sam was about to knock.

She smiled at Carly who didn't return the gesture. Instead Carly turned to look at Courtney and mouthed, "Call me" before leaving.

Courtney reluctantly made her way to the living room, motioning for Sam to come in. She felt herself tense up as the brunette removed her coat.

"Sorry, if this is inconvenient for you," Sam said as Courtney noticed how much she was fidgeting with her nails. Sam exhaled deeply. "I sort of need someone to talk to. No offense but I usually go to Reese with these kinds of things but she's not home. There's nothing like living across the hall from your best friend."

"Um, here, let me get you something to drink. Maybe some iced tea? Water?" Courtney said getting up.

"Water would be fine. Oh, with lemon. Thanks."

Courtney scurried to the kitchen, rolling her eyes. She could feel a headache coming on, thanks in part to Sam and her MIA husband.

"So, what can I help you with?" Courtney asked as she grabbed a pitcher and filled it with ice and water.

Sam hesitated. "It's about Jason …"

"What about Jason?" Oh yeah. This was definitely a headache coming.

"He's changed …" Sam began, her voice even lower than usual.

"Oh?" Courtney remarked, trying her hardest to sound concerned. "How so?"

"I really don't want to sound bizarre or crazy. I don't want to jump to any conclusions but I think Jason is seeing someone else," Sam sighed, the last part in almost a whisper.

As soon as the words left from Sam's mouth, Courtney felt the pitcher drop from her hands. She watched as it shattered into a million pieces, in slow motion almost, water and slices of lemon spewing onto the tile floor. She stood there, frozen, until Sam waddled over.

"Are you okay?" she asked, kneeling to pick up fragments of the broken glass. She carefully gathered the sharp pieces along with the lemon and threw it in the trash can.

Courtney began to look for the mop, eventually finding it to soak up the water. She felt Sam's eyes on her so she continued to clean.

"Did you hear what I said?" Sam asked, sitting herself at the counter.

Courtney kept quiet until the floor was completely dry and even then she bundled up sheets of paper towel and scrubbed vigorously.

"Um," she began, still on the floor and out of sight from Sam. "Why would you think Jason is seeing someone else?"

Sam tapped her foot loudly against the chair. "It's the only logical thing I can come up with to explain why he's so damn distant."

"Well," Courtney said rising to her feet. She feigned ignorance. "I'm sure he's just nervous over the baby." She shook her head in reassurance.

"I don't know," Sam replied. She rubbed her forehead. "I just _don't know_. If Jason is nervous about everything then he should come to me. I'm not exactly calm either but if he could just come to me with any anxieties or worries he has, it would make me feel a lot better."

"Maybe you should confront him over it," Courtney suggested. "See what he has to say."

"How can I? He's always gone when I wake up. He's out all day doing Lord knows what. I can only pray that he comes home safely. Of course I can't ask him about anything because God forbid I break The Code. Then when he finally does get in at night, I'm either sound asleep or I wake up to him on the couch. And just recently, Courtney, he was gone for a few days. I called his cell and it was off the entire time. What am I supposed to do about that?" Sam responded looking up at the expression on Courtney's face. She couldn't tell if she was genuinely concerned, bored or annoyed. She watched as Courtney nearly reeled, struggling to sit down next to her.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked. "You don't look too good."

"I'm fine, Sam. Just a little tired," Courtney said trying to force a smile. "It's like what you said. You're probably just jumping to conclusions. I doubt Jason is seeing someone else. He's not … the affair kind of guy." She almost shuddered at the word –and could have sworn that Sam did too.

"I've been trying to avoid that expression," Sam said quietly. "He's a decent man. Sometimes I think I don't deserve him after what happened with Sonny and me. I was mistress; you can't get any worse than that." She noticed Courtney looking at her with the same blank expression. "_Well_, I have wasted enough of your time," she said slowly as she patted her hands against the counter. "Thank you. I know I probably sound like a crazed maniac but I swear I'm not."

The two laughed lightly as Sam walked towards the door.

"Tell Jason I said, 'Hi'" Courtney called after Sam who nodded before walking out.

As if on cue, Carly soon ran in slamming the door behind her.

"Come on, come on. You know the routine," she said plopping down on the couch. "I saw her walk out and get into that shiny new car of hers, not that I was looking out or anything."

Courtney laughed. "There's nothing to tell, Carly. Honest. She's just nervous over the pregnancy thing."

"Eh. If anyone should be nervous it should be that baby. If it were smart, it would try to stay in as long as possible." She reached into her pocket. "Here," she said throwing a thin packet at Courtney, "its tea. Something to help you get over that bug you're fighting. See how great of a friend I am."

Courtney ran her finger over it and set it aside then falling back onto her bed.

"What's wrong? You don't like Green tea? Well, you can't have any of my Lemon. I've only got one left and I'm not that nice."

"Carly …" Courtney said staring at the ceiling suddenly noticing little nicks of cracked paint. "You have no idea how much I'm praying that this is some kind of virus or something. Because if it's what I think it is, I'm going to need a helluva lot more than tea."


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

**A/N**: Wow. Twice in one week? Oh, yes. This is my Get Out of Jail Free cardfor all of you Update Police out there. Enjoy. Oh, and thanks for the reviews. Highly appreciated.

* * *

Carly followed closely behind Courtney into the bathroom where the blonde promptly opened the medicine cabinet and retrieved a bottle of aspirin. She swallowed two, shrugged then swallowed three more. 

"If you're talking about what I _think _you're talking about then you need stop knocking back pills and talk," Carly said. She crossed her arms over her chest. "Do you think … you're pregnant?"

Courtney laughed as she felt her eyes beginning to burn. Great. Now she was crying. "Oh, who knows?" she said nonchalantly as she laughed again trying her hardest to blink back tears.

Carly stared at her in disbelief. A look of shock on her face. "Wait. I thought Dr. Meadows said-"

"Oh, who cares what Dr. Meadows said!" Courtney yelled wiping her eyes. Her tone had startled even her and Carly took a step back at it. "She told me that I would have problems conceiving if it is really _that _important to you. But, as we all know, anything can happen. But, what matters is that I made a choice and now I'm paying for it so just drop it, okay? I should have never said anything."

She clicked the light off and led the way out of the bathroom. She crawled back under the covers and turned towards the window, her back to Carly.

"You can't just sit in bed and ignore this," Carly said. "You need answers, Courtney."

"I don't want any help," she said, pulling away.

"Well, you're getting it whether you like it or not," Carly retorted. She sighed trying to calm herself down. "Listen-"

"No, you listen!" Courtney shot up. "I said to drop it, Carly. I just need to be alone and think. I don't want this to be anyone's problem but mine. Not yours, not my father's, not Jas-"

She had to give it to herself. She tried to refrain from saying his name but her efforts were unsuccessful.

Carly nodded her head slowly. She gave her a sympathetic grin. "Exactly what I was afraid of," she whispered. "How could you Courtney?"

"What are you talking about?" Courtney asked rubbing a hand over her face. She tried to look unfazed but Carly knew her better than that.

"Okay, don't you dare try and brush this off. I heard what you said or what you were gonna say," Carly said, practically screaming. "You were about to say Jason's name. I'm not stupid or deaf, Courtney."

"I didn't say you were," was all she offered reaching over for a glass of water that sat on her nightstand.

Carly shook her head then stood up. She put a hand to her hip and began pacing the room. "We have to get you a pregnancy test."

"_We _don't have to do anything," Courtney replied. "But _you _can stay out of it."

"Courtney, I'm trying to be a friend here."

"Well, if you were my friend, you'd listen to me," Courtney sighed. "I mean it, Carly. You don't get to make choices on this one. Nothing has been confirmed yet. So just leave it at that."

"Fine."

"Fine."

Carly muttered something under her breath and began walking towards the door. She stopped halfway then turned back around, making her way back to the bed room. She bent down and picked up the tea packet. "I don't lend rude people my Green tea," she said before leaving.

Courtney rolled her eyes and turned back over, praying for sleep.

* * *

It was pitch black outside when she finally woke up. Her eyes fluttered open but her body felt paralyzed. She felt suffocated by the sheets which were soaking wet along with her pajamas. Damp strands of her were pressed against her forehead and she suddenly wondered if the heat was turned up extra high. 

But in her uncomfortable state, she felt like smiling. Maybe she really was coming down with something. The weather in Port Charles wasn't exactly something to run through the sprinkler in while the weather in Florida nearly weighed you down with exhaustion, it was so damn hot. Yes, that was it. The trip was taking its toll on her. The sudden atmosphere change. Besides, waking up hot as hell couldn't nearly be considered a symptom of pregnancy.

She removed her shirt and her pants then caught a glimpse of her pink bra and panties in the mirror. It was funny how certain colors could give you a completely different image. The black lingerie she often wore in Jason's presence made her feel somewhat empowered. It wasn't prissy or pure … it was black lingerie. Normally pink would give off the same vibe as white –charming, naïve, and maybe even innocent but she knew better. The innocent card had been played too many times. It had been dead for awhile now.

Courtney slipped on a short, silk robe and made her way to the kitchen in the dark then suddenly thought of Carly. She was positive she still wasn't upset at her. They would just sit and talk over a bowl of ice cream, turn on a sappy movie and it would all be forgotten.

She told herself this as she walked towards the door, suddenly more optimistic than she had been in awhile. But her mood was suddenly changed when she opened the door, only to see Jason.

"Well, look who decided to come out of hiding," she said quietly, half joking, half pissed off.

"I've been busy," he said trying to walk around her. Courtney placed a hand on his chest. "Let's go in the hall." The last thing she needed was to be alone, in the dark, in her apartment, with Jason.

She followed him out and closed the door behind her. She placed herself on the floor and stretched out her legs, touching her toes.

"You're not gonna sit down? Come on," Courtney patted a place beside her.

Jason laughed off the request. "No thanks. I can't stay long anyway."

"Oh, that's right. Gotta make it in time for dinner. Tell me, what is Mrs. Morgan cooking tonight?" Courtney said playing with the hem on the end of her robe.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Courtney looked up. "Exactly what I said. What's Sam cooking tonight?"

"You didn't mean it like that, Courtney," Jason said. "You know what you're doing."

"And you know what you're doing too," she replied standing up. "Instead of working like your wife seems to think, you're with your mistress. And that only happens when it's convenient for you."

Jason went to speak but stopped himself. Instead he clinched his fist in frustration.

"That is what I am right?" Courtney asked quietly. "Your mistress … mistress …"

"Stop it, Courtney."

"Why? I'm only speaking the truth, Jason. Unless you have some sort of problem with that word. I don't why you would though."

"Look, I don't know what's going on with you, so I'm just gonna leave," Jason said turning to walk away.

"Thanks for stopping by," she yelled after him. She turned around and walked back into the loft, slamming the door behind her. _Well that was fun. _She sat on the floor for a minute before another knock came.

Groaning, she got up and went to answer it. "What?" she yelled pulling the knob back.

"Whoa whoa whoa," Carly said walking in. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," Courtney answered. She looked curiously at Carly who stood with both hands behind her back. "What are you hiding?"

Carly closed her eyes. "Promise you won't get mad, okay?"

"Just tell me what you have," Courtney said tightly.

"Promise!"

"Alright, Carly, I promise!"

Carly slowly released her hands, dangling a small brown paper bag in front of Courtney's face. "For you."

Courtney snatched it from her, opening it up. "A pregnancy test? I thought I told you to stay out of this!"

"Oh, come on, Courtney. You need an answer so you can take the next step and deal with this," Carly cried as she followed Courtney towards the back. "Just go take it, okay?"

"If it would get you off my back then fine," Courtney sighed.

"Great!" said Carly realizing she sounded a little too enthusiastic. "I mean, lets get this over with."

She opened up the small box and handed the thin application to Courtney. She unfolded the directions. "Step one; _Make sure the urine sample and unopened pregnancy test are at room temperature prior to administering the test_. Step two-"

"Carly, I think I can handle this," Courtney laughed. "Set the timer on the stove and I'll be out in a minute."

* * *

The two waited for what seemed like forever. As the last of only five minutes winded down, Courtney got up. "I can't sit any longer." She walked into the kitchen, pouring herself a glass of ice water. As she raised the glass to her mouth, the clock buzzed. She stood in silence as Carly turned around to face her. 

"Aren't you going to come over here?" Carly asked.

Courtney shook her head. "Just … just read me the results. I don't wanna look at it."

Carly shrugged and reluctantly picked up the cassette. She squinted then held it away from her eyes. "Oh, wow. I really do need glasses, you know."

"Just read the results!"

"Okay, okay." She looked at Courtney, who had begun to tear up. "Oh my God, Courtney," she almost whispered. "This test is positive."


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

**A/N**: So so _so _sorry for the wait. I had to settle into my dorm and get everything right for my second year of college. Oh, and not to mention that my One Tree Hill DVD's have been taking up a lot of my time too (and it's all your fault, Nicole!). So, yeah, Courtney is royally pissing me off on the show right now BUT I will not be biased and write her all crappy or anything. That's not my style. Trust me, I'm a nice girl. I swear!

* * *

After Carly repeated the test results to Courtney again, then again and then, well, … again, both women sat in silence. Courtney wouldn't leave her spot in the kitchen and Carly knew better than to retreat back to her own apartment. 

"So what are you going to do?" she asked in almost a whisper. The brunette watched as Courtney kept her eyes focused on the floor beneath her.

"I'm having a baby, what else is there to do?"

Carly bit her tongue. "There are … other options, you know."

Courtney looked over at her. "Well, if you're suggesting an abortion-"

"I didn't say that, Courtney. I'm not telling you to do anything. I'm just letting you know."

"I know about all the decisions that I can make, alright? I don't need some lecture. In fact, I don't want to focus on anything right now."

So instead of arguing with her friend, Carly suggested the two women go to lunch just to get out for a little while. She would help Courtney if she needed it or asked. If she didn't, well, she would keep her mouth shut –or at least try.

* * *

"So, I've decided what I'm going to do," Courtney announced as she and Carly reached the park bench. 

"Oh?" replied Carly as they both sat down.

"Yep. I'm going to have the baby and raise it by myself," Courtney said shaking her head in reassurance. "See, I'm going to leave town, totally change my identity and raise the baby alone. That's the only way I see it."

Carly nodded. "Oh, that'll work. Yeah, I mean, no one would notice that all of a sudden Courtney Matthews just skipped town. Especially her brother, Sonny Corinthos knowing that he'll have her face on a milk carton by the time the plane takes off." She turned towards her. "Just tell Jason. You'll be saving yourself a lot of trouble. You know how Jason is about secrets and lies and it'll be even worse since his child is involved."

She watched as Courtney clenched her jaw and matched her gaze.

"How many times do I have to tell you that Jason has nothing to do with this? God, you're so hell bent on us having a baby, that you'll just make up anything in that pathetic little mind of yours!" Courtney cried standing up.

"Obviously I look like Sam to you because clearly you think I'm naïve or something!"

"Don't ever mention her name to me again …"

"I'm not stupid, Courtney!" Carly yelled. "For heavens sake, you're wearing the man's wedding band on your finger!"

Courtney looked down at her hand. Carly was right. Her right thumb sported Jason's ring.

"You're not fooling anyone. No matter how stupid you think Sam is, she's gonna find out sooner or later."

"Shut up, Carly."

"And when she does, all hell is gonna break loose because you'll be in the middle of everything. Sam's pregnant. You're pregnant. Who do you think Jason will choose?" Carly continued inching closer to Courtney. "Yeah, that's right. Sam. She's his wife. You're his mistress. He made vows to her, not you!"

"Get out of my face, Carly!" Courtney screamed as she shoved her, the petite woman falling to the ground. Carly landed on her back, looking up in astonishment.

"What the-" She struggled to get up but Courtney lunged at her again, falling on top of her. She pinned her down as Carly reached for her hair, tugging at the long strands.

"Get off me, Courtney!"

"No!"

"You're lucky you're knocked up or I'd get my bat!"

"Let go of my hair, Carly! You're pulling it out!"

"No!"

"Whoa! Whoa!" a voice yelled behind Courtney. She turned around to see Jason running over with Sam waddling behind him.

Jason pulled her off a screaming Carly, as Sam helped her to the feet.

Carly snatched her arm away and waved her purse in Courtney's face. "You're crazy, you know that?"

"What happened?" Jason asked.

Carly smirked. "Courtney just attacked me out of the blue. Who knows? Must be something in the water."

"Are you alright?" Sam asked.

"I'm standing up, aren't I?" she snapped before walking off and taking one last look at the blonde.

"Well, are you okay, at least?" Courtney looked as Sam's concerned expression then at Jason.

"I'm fine. It was … just some stupid disagreement," she answered still staring at Jason.

"Hey, honey, why don't you go on ahead to Kelly's? I'll catch up in a minute, I want to talk to Courtney," Sam said with a smile.

"Okay. Be careful." Courtney watched in near revulsion as Sam pulled her husband near, standing on her tip-toes to kiss his cheek.

"So, uh, what's this all about?" Courtney said. She turned to sit down but suddenly felt lightheaded. She felt Sam grip her arm as she staggered, nearly falling to the ground.

Sam gently guided her over to the bench. "Hey, are you sick or something?"

"No. I'm just a little nauseous that's all."

"Oh! Um, put your head between your legs. Yeah, there you go. Always helps!"

Courtney felt like vomiting on the spot as she felt Sam's small hand rub her back. She perked up, smiling as she inched away from the woman. "I'm fine, really. I just need to go eat."

Sam grinned. "Oh, come on ... I think congratulations are in order."

Courtney blinked then let out an uneasy laugh. "Congratulations?"

"You're sitting here, absolutely nauseous out of your mind. You're pale. You're cranky. Courtney, you're pregnant."

"Admit it," she continued as Courtney stood up. "You're expecting a baby!" Sam whispered, taking Courtney's hands and squeezing them in excitement. She wrapped her arms around her and embraced her tightly. "That's wonderful."

"Sam, I'm not pregnant ..." The two made eye contact before Courtney looked away.

"Look, I understand you not wanting to say anything until you're a few months along-"

"Sam, I flattered that you're concerned or whatever it is you're doing, but I'm not pregnant. Really, I'm not."

She threw her hands up. "Okay. Okay. I realize I'm the last person you would want to share the good news with. But I know how hard the baby thing is for you and, if you are, Courtney, I wish you nothing but luck." With that being said, she gave one last smile before walking off.

* * *

Courtney had sat in the park for a good two hours after Sam had walked off. She sat, contemplating her thoughts. She laughed over Carly, knowing that by tomorrow night they would be talking and justify baking cookies at 3 in the morning. She cried over Jason, knowing that he was just as confused as she was but couldn't help but smile through her tears as the thought of him with a baby in his arms. 

Slowly, she headed over to Kelly's; passing a few people, one of them including Reese. She waved to the woman who responded with a small look her way before turning back to her cell phone conversation. Courtney shrugged at it, realizing that Reese and her "best gal pal" Sam were nothing more than clones of her and Carly anyway. The way they spent their days fawning over their men and gossiping in their pajama's … it was nearly laughable how those two had taken their places.

As if on cue almost, her thoughts were interrupted as she caught site of a little girl and a young woman making their way into the restaurant.

"_Well, isn't this a coincidence?" _she thought to herself.

Courtney smiled at the young woman as she struggled to place a ribbon on one of two raven black braids. The little girl whined and squirmed, trying to pull away.

"She hates French braids," the woman said, rolling her eyes. "She's always letting her friends play in her hair."

"They hurt," the girl said as she chewed on her nails.

"Well, I'm sure you look beautiful with them," Courtney replied. "What's your name?"

"Ashley"

"That's a very pretty name," Courtney smiled.

When the dark-haired child didn't respond, the woman groaned. "Please, ignore her lack of manners." She sighed, clearly exhausted. "Hey, sweetie, why don't you go in and sit at the counter?"

"I'm sorry about that," she said extending her hand as the girl ran inside. "I'm Gina"

"Oh, don't worry about it. I'm Courtney, by the way. So … is she your little girl?"

"Indeed she is," Gina laughed as she sat down at a table. Courtney followed. "She's nine and very headstrong, as you saw. Her father was the only one could really tame her."

"Do you and your husband live around here? I don't think I've seen you around ..."

"We used to ... many moons ago before Ashley was born. He died two months before I gave birth," she answered before stopping Courtney from beginning to apologize. "He used to work in a warehouse across those docks over there. A bomb was planted and it was one of those 'wrong place at the wrong time' situations. Port Charles isn't a place where I would want to raise by child. It's not exactly Disneyland."

She looked over at Courtney, who was staring at the ground, speechless. "I'm so sorry. I probably brought down your entire day!"

"Believe me, you haven't." Courtney sighed heavily. "I know exactly what you're talking about."

Before the woman could speak, the door of Kelly's spread open and Jason walked out.

"Hey. I've been waiting for you," Courtney said to him, standing up.

"Is this your husband?" Gina smiled.

Jason looked down at Courtney, who returned the puzzled look. "No. Actually …"

"Oh, I'm sorry." She laughed. "Well, I really should be going. I'm sure my daughter is giving that poor man at the counter hell. Nice meeting you."

As she closed the door behind her, Courtney turned back to Jason.

"Where's Sam?"

"Talking to Mike at the counter. Reese is supposed to be meeting her …"

"I see." Courtney looked around uneasily. "Um, I need to talk to you about something."

"Wait. Before you do, I might as well just say this. I think we both need this to be over."


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

**A/N: **Thank you for the reviews … and letting me know that Jason is an ass. Stephi, all typos are dedicated to you. Once again, my sincerest apologies for the wait. This was probably the longest I've gone without updating. However, I am EXTREMELY busy right now. School, work and pledging a sorority is kicking my Journey loving ass. But thanks for being faithful readers. I love you all … and this is beginning to sound like a lame ass Emmy speech …

* * *

As the woman walked in and closed the door behind her, Courtney turned back to Jason. 

"Where's Sam?"

"Talking to Mike at the counter. Reese is supposed to be meeting her …"

"I see." Courtney looked around uneasily. "Um, I need to talk to you about something."

"Wait. Before you do, I might as well just say this. I think we both need this to be over."

"Has Sam been asking questions?" Courtney watched as Jason looked at her before staring at the ground. "Is she suspicious or something?"

Jason shook his head in response.

"Then what's wrong? I thought things were fine …"

He looked up. "This isn't fine, Courtney", he whispered. "It's never been fine."

"But-"

"Sam's pregnant," Jason stated. "She's my wife, Courtney …"

"I don't care!" she suddenly cried. "You weren't saying that all the nights you left her bed to be in mine! You weren't saying that when you were taking me on vacations and buying me jewelry and letting Sam think you were out making runs when really you were two hours away treating me to some fancy dinner!" She wiped a hand harshly across her eyes, extremely angry with herself for shedding tears over him. "So, what, have things gotten sorta complicated for you? Don't know whose bed you're planning to wake up in, anymore? Accidentally called Sam the wrong name? Or are you a tad upset that you let Sam get her way after she had to practically beg you to get her pregnant?"

"Just admit, Jason" she said quietly as he just continued to stare at her. "You didn't want that baby. Allowing Sam to fulfill her white picket fence fantasy was a mistake and you know it."

"No, Courtney," Jason responded, shaking his head. "The only mistake I made was letting you into the penthouse that night," he answered before turning to walk off.

She sighed heavily, walking to a chair then sitting down. She had done it again. Pissed Jason off only to have him walk away and not speak to her for a few days. Only this time, she was almost positive that there wouldn't be any kind of making up in the near future.

Her cell phone vibrated as she went to put her head in her hands.

"What?" she answered, flipping it open.

"Hi!" a woman with a disgustingly cheery disposition replied from the other end. "This is Katy from General Hospital! I'm just calling to confirm your appointment with Dr. Meadows."

"Um … thank you?"

"No problem! Have a lovely day!"

She closed the phone, rolling her eyes then proceeding to throw it to the ground.

"And, no, I'm not picking that up for you," Carly said, briskly walking past holding a plastic bag filled with ice to her right cheek and making sure the kick a piece of the broken object with the sharp point of her shoe.

"Then don't," Courtney replied.

Carly spun around. "I would but since you punched me and all-"

"Oh, please! I did not punch you!"

Carly shrugged. "Punch, scratch, pull hair out, all the same thing!"

"Well, I'm sorry …," Courtney answered, paying more attention to her nails than her best friend.

"Your sincerity slays me. Anyways, is it okay to come near you or will I get drop-kicked?"

"You're not going to get drop-kicked, Carly," Courtney sighed. "I told you that I'm sorry."

"Fair enough," Carly answered with a shrug. She pulled up a chair and stared at Courtney. "At the risk of sounding like a broken record, did-"

"No, Carly. I didn't tell Jason anything …"

"Why not?"

"I just didn't and I don't want to go into that." She then shifted towards Carly. "I have an appointment with Dr. Meadow's tomorrow," she sighed.

"Why? The test said came back positive. You're pregnant. What else is there to know?" Carly replied.

Courtney shrugged. "I don't know. I'm sure that this is considered a high-risk pregnancy. I also need vitamins … and all that other stuff …" She watched as Carly looked away, trying to stifle a laugh. "What is it?"

"Oh, sweetie. You're so clueless right now."

"I know," Courtney sighed.

"But maybe," Carly continued. "It's some sort of blessing in disguise, you know? A beautiful, sweet blessing in disguise …"

* * *

_Blessing in disguise … blessing in disguise._ Courtney continued to repeat this to herself as she sat waiting the next day in her hospital room for Dr. Meadow's to return with the results of her pregnancy test. 

She swung her legs back and forth, trying to grasp onto the fact that within a few minutes, her entire life course could be altered.

"Well, Courtney, I have your results," Dr. Meadow's announced as she walked in, closing the door behind her.

"And …"

"It was a false alarm, Courtney." She sat placed her clipboard in front of her. "You're not pregnant."

"But the test …"

"The test was wrong. They're not 100 accurate. Close to it but not always. I really wish you would have come here the minute you thought you were pregnant. I'm sure your hopes were up. I'm sorry about that."

"Don't be," Courtney answered blinking back tears. "I'm actually relieved to be honest with you. For a split second there I was completely elated but now is definitely not the time to bring a child into this world."

Dr. Meadow's smiled. "I understand. Well, I wish you all the best in the future. You can get dressed and I'll have everything waiting for you at the front desk."

* * *

"Another ultrasound!" 

Courtney spun around from her position at the nurse's circle. She turned to see Sam behind her. "Excuse me?"

"I have another ultrasound today," Sam said smiling from ear to ear. "We already have pictures at home and even this really nice video but today it's just a simple test. We're just seeing the position of the baby. Nothing special."

"How lovely …" Courtney responded flatly.

"It really is," Sam carried on. "We're almost there. A few more months and baby Morgan will be here, having her wonderful father wrapped around her little finger."

As Sam went on about the finishing touches on the baby room, how Jason hated the name Marion and "baby's first vacation to the island", Courtney tried her hardest to seem distracted. She'd clear her throat, look at her watch, tap her foot against the ground but Sam continued to talk and she had actually listened to her every word –until she heard the familiar bell of the elevator and watched as three staff members exited, followed by Jason.

Her gaze followed him towards the waiting area where the two finally made eye contact. He sat down, still staring at her before finally pulling out his cell phone to make a call. However, Sam hadn't noticed. She continued to chat. She didn't even look behind her once as she was called back to a room by a nurse.

At first Courtney had tried to nonchalantly walk towards the elevators, fully aware of Jason's eyes on her. She pressed the down button and stood impatiently for a good two minutes or so before realizing that out of all the times for the elevator to be held up, it would be this one.

So, taking a chance, she made her way over to Jason, who was still in conversation on his cell.

"We need to talk," she said sternly.

When he went to a raise a hand to stall her, she ignored him. "We need to talk," she repeated. When he didn't budge, she got louder. "Jason. Hang up the phone. We need to talk." At that point, she had earned a few stares not that she cared or anything.

Jason got up and followed her, as she led the way to the stairwell. When he closed the door behind, he shrugged. "What?"

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

"Is that it?"

"No, that's not it," she shot back, clearly annoyed. She exhaled, trying to calm herself down. "I shouldn't have said those … things to you about your baby … and your wi-, and Sam … I was wrong. And like I said, I'm sorry."

Jason nodded and then turned to walk back towards the door before Courtney grabbed him.

"Wait a minute. I need to know that you forgive me, alright?" When he didn't reply, she moved in closer, before slowly wrapping her arms around his neck. "You do forgive me don't you?" She smiled as she stood on her tip toes to kiss him softly.

"Courtney, don't …"

"I'm sorry, Jason," she whispered as she kissed him again. This time, he didn't hold back. Instead, he returned the kiss.

And, well, soon enough, she had shown just how sorry she was. As they lay together in the master bedroom of the penthouse, clothes strewn every which way over the plush carpet, neither one even wanted to think about the predicament they had just sank even deeper into.

However, they couldn't have even if they wanted to, especially since a door had suddenly slammed shut and a familiar voice called out, looking for her husband.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

A/N: Thank you for the reviews. I know this is late and I'm not explaining myself again. Just please be grateful. That's all I ask.

* * *

"Jason?" the voice cried from downstairs. "Jason, are you here?" 

"You have got to be kidding me," Courtney groaned climbing out of bed. She grabbed a sheet and pulled it tautly around her body. "What is she doing here?"

"I don't know," Jason responded as both scrambled in the darkness to find their clothing.

He pulled on a pair of pants and shirt as Courtney did the same. "Stay in here," he instructed before walking out and closing the door behind him.

She sighed, scratching her head and then proceeding to walk around the room. She suddenly remembered Jason telling her how Sam recently had decided to designate 'His and Her' sides of the room. She picked up an extravagant lavender and silver perfume bottle and sprayed it, coughing at the spicy scent. It must have been that overly expensive stuff Jason was always complaining about.

Courtney found her way over to the closet, making sure to trace a hand over nearly everything single object on Sam's vanity table just because. She slid open the door and smirked at how uniformed everything seemed to be. It was a mere sea of black pants, black skirts, black boots and anything and everything else … in black. She laughed at how there was a separate rack for lingerie. Panties and bras, all in black of course, were hung meticulously. Who did such things?

But suddenly Courtney's focus turned as a flicker of silver caught her attention. She reached for the item, realizing it was a garment bag … then realizing that it could only be on thing –Sam's wedding dress.

She thought back to that day as she gently removed it from the closet, laying it across the bed. Sam had gotten her perfect wedding while Jason gotten a bill of nothing less of $800,000. But, Sam was happy and that was all that mattered.

Of course, she had every right to be. The months leading up to the grand soiree had been hell for Jason though he never would have admitted it. The initial date was scrapped due to the simple fact that Sam wasn't ready. Well, her _dress _wasn't ready. She decided that she wanted a one-of-a-kind haute couture gown for her wedding day, which she modeled after a little fairytale called 'Cinderella'. The dress was made in Paris by a little known yet "so unbelievably amazing" designer who spoke no English but decided that after only one meeting with the future Mrs. Morgan, she had the perfect design in mind. One genuine Swarovski crystal beaded bodice, complete 7-foot-long train, and 15 months later, not to mention arriving in a horse-drawn crystal carriage, it was solidified: Samantha McCall had not only had the wedding of the year, Samantha McCall had not only had the wedding of the decade but Samantha McCall had had the wedding of the century according to Port Charles.

Hell, even Carly had to give it to her. The woman couldn't decorate a room for the life of her but she knew how to throw together a wedding. Her name was a Society page fixture for weeks and young soon-to-be wives would stop her in various places and praise her until her freckled cheeks were blushing with embarrassment –exactly what the new bride had strived for.

Going against her yearn to remove the dress from the bag, try it on and twirl around the room in it once or twice, Courtney quickly placed it back in its spot before turning to follow after Jason.

She halted at the top of the stairs before seeing him standing at the table. She smiled as she crept up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist. She pulled back when he resisted, turning around to see Reese walk out with a mug in her hand.

Courtney smiled uneasily as she slowly back away from Jason. "Hey …"

In her typical stance, Reese just smiled tightly at her. She turned back to Jason. "I don't know where he is. He's not answering his cell. I'm really worried."

"He probably just hasn't had time to call," Jason assured her.

Reese nodded her head. "You're probably right."

Silence soon fell between the three in the room. Jason focused on his shoe. Courtney tried not to make eye contact with Reese, who, if she wasn't staring at Courtney, was fidgeting with her nails.

"Well," Courtney said, finally speaking up. "I'm leaving now. And Jason, if you ever need anymore help with … Sam's … anniversary gift just call me and we'll … get together or something."

She smiled quickly at Reese before walking out.

When she reached the lobby, she prepared for her regular routine. Her car was usually parked in the back, away from everyone else. One of the guards would park it for her and then retrieve it at the end of the night as she stood waiting in the shadows with another guard. She had been ready to declare herself home-free until the aroma of a familiar scent overwhelmed her.

She spun around and came face to face with Sam who was on her cell. When the brunette finally realized who she was through the darkness, the let whoever was on the other end go and slowly closed her phone.

Courtney smiled uneasily. "Hi …" She looked away.

"Hi," Sam replied. "Sort of late for you to be here –visiting Jason."

Courtney turned her focus back to Sam. "What do you mean?"

Sam laughed. "Oh, come on, Courtney. This act is really starting to wear thin. You're over here visiting Jason … at 1:07 in the morning. Probably telling him the good news, I bet."

"Actually, there isn't any good news. I'm not pregnant."

"False alarm?"

"No, actually," Courtney answered rather annoyed. "Like I told you earlier, Sam, I am not pregnant. Just worry about your own pregnancy, okay?"

"Okay, okay. No reason to get upset. My God, you act as if I caught you with your hand in the cookie jar or something." She smirked before turning around and entering the building.

* * *

"Guess I won't be picking out wallpaper swatches for a baby room any time soon," Courtney said accepting a mug of tea from Carly. 

The two sat in Carly's apartment. The fiasco in the penthouse had happened a good week ago. Luckily, she hadn't run into Sam after that night. She hadn't seen Reese either. Jason had called a few times and a breakfast date had turned into a little something extra on the limo ride back.

But did she have any regret's? No. The pregnancy scare had, well, scared the shit out of her but she was admittedly stubborn. She didn't care at all. As long as Jason wasn't upset, she hadn't a care in the world.

"It was probably just a fluke in the test," she continued as Carly peered into her mug. "Are you okay?"

Her friend looked up. "What? Oh, yeah, I'm fine."

"Carly … com on, I know you. What's wrong?"

She sighed and shut her eyes. "Oh, God. Um … I've never been good at admitting I was wrong so I'm just gonna get everything out and, no, I won't repeat it. Okay … I sorta lied and said you were pregnant even though the test was negative and the sign was clear as day. I'm really sorry but I just wanted to teach you a lesson and make you see how wrong you were for sleeping with Jason."

Courtney slammed her cup down on Carly's glass table. "You what?"

"Now, I said I wasn't repeating anything …"

"How could you? Carly, you made me think I was pregnant!"

"I know and I'm sorry but you needed to be taught a lesson! I did it because I'm your friend and I love you."

"No, Carly, that is not love. That is lying. I told you to stay out of my personal life!" Courtney screamed.

"You had a _pregnancy scare_. You thought your _married lover _got you pregnant, Courtney. I'm sorry but I would be a horrible friend if I didn't do something!"

"No, I think you're just a horrible friend. In fact, were you ever my friend?"

"Courtney …" Carly started taken by the surprise.

"No. The moment you get in good with someone, you go and you screw it up and screw them over. You've done things to me before and I've let them slide. You have your comments here and there and I just kept my mouth shut because, well, that's Carly. But this is different. You were out of line. Whether you think this thing with Jason is right or wrong, you didn't have a say in the matter. This is my life and I will make the decisions. You had no right."

"And you had no right keeping a pregnancy scare from me."

Carly looked up as Courtney turned around and came face to face with Jason.

She didn't even have to ask. She knew that he had heard everything.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

**A/N**: Okay, don't take this the wrong way but I have to say something. Please believe that I appreciate every single review but I ask that some of you, not all of you, but some of you become a bit more courteous in your reviews. Whether you like it or not, this is 1. **NOT** an anti Sam story. Therefore, she is not just going to fall off a cliff and then all's well in Journey Land. No. Second, please do not let your personal hate of Kelly Monaco and/or Sam McCall influence your words. While I am no fan of either one,I cannot tell you how sick I am of, "OMG, she is SUCH a bitch!" and "What a whore!" Sam, at least I don't think she is, is neither a bitch nor a whore in this story. If you think she is on GH, then fine, but don't let that affect your reviews. Thanks.

* * *

"How could you? Carly, you made me think I was pregnant!" 

"I know and I'm sorry but you needed to be taught a lesson! I did it because I'm your friend and I love you."

"No, Carly, that is not love. That is lying. I told you to stay out of my personal life!" Courtney screamed.

"You had a _pregnancy scare_. You thought your _married lover _got you pregnant, Courtney. I'm sorry but I would be a horrible friend if I didn't do something!"

"No, I think you're just a horrible friend. In fact, were you ever my friend?"

"Courtney …" Carly started taken by the surprise.

"No. The moment you get in good with someone, you go and you screw it up and screw them over. You've done things to me before and I've let them slide. You have your comments here and there and I just kept my mouth shut because, well, that's Carly. But this is different. You were out of line. Whether you think this thing with Jason is right or wrong, you didn't have a say in the matter. This is my life and I will make the decisions. You had no right."

"And you had no right keeping a pregnancy scare from me."

Carly looked up as Courtney turned around and came face to face with Jason. She didn't even have to ask. She knew that he had heard everything.

She went to speak but no words came from her mouth.

"You thought you were pregnant?" he asked.

Still, Courtney said nothing. She stood there, trying her best to blink back tears.

"She did, Jason," Carly answered. "She thought she was pregnant."

"Stay out of this, Carly." He didn't take his eyes off Courtney. "Why didn't you tell me?"

She looked down, not able to deal with him standing there. "I sorry," she whispered.

"You did it again, Courtney!"

"I didn't do anything!" she yelled. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to get upset. I didn't want you to think that I had tricked you or something. I just wanted to be sure about everything …"

She watched as Jason shook his head and turned to walk out. It was typical Jason, never wanting to further an argument. At this point, he would usually go across the hall and ask Sonny to put him to work to get his mind off of everything. He'd come home later, they'd talk and everything would be okay again. But this was different.

Courtney ran after him. She grabbed his arm. "Jason, don't! Let's just talk, okay? We can go to my place and talk about everything." She couldn't stop the tears this time. They were rapidly streaming down her face. "Please don't leave. Just don't leave me, okay?"

"Let me go, Courtney …"

"Don't go …" she cried as Carly went to grab her. She tried running after him but felt herself being held back. "Jason, just listen! Please!"

But it was too late. He had walked out, slamming the door behind him. She continued crying, falling to her knees as Carly held her.

"Get off me!" she screamed. She got back on her feet as Carly followed. "This is all your fault!" she said with a finger in Carly's face. "You're always in other people's business and now Jason hates me!"

"I was trying to help! I just-"

She was interrupted as Courtney's hand came in contact with her face, striking her. Carly raised a hand to smack the blonde back but, instead, recoiled it, balling it into a fist instead.

She pointed towards the door. "Get out of my house, Courtney."

"This is all your fault," Courtney repeated. "I will never forgive you for this."

"Get out."

* * *

The last thing Courtney remembered after reaching her own loft was mixing a drink and taking it over to the couch. She slid the wet bar next to it and continued to refill her glass until she could feel herself going under. 

She wasn't sure exactly when her head had hit the soft sofa … or how two boxes of Kleenex had ended up empty and strewn on the floor … or even how a vase had gotten broken into a million pieces.

She had slept for hours as various images danced around in her head.

_Courtney felt a cool breeze against her back and turned around, startled to see that she was on the docks. She squinted at the vision in front of her._

_Sam sat on the stairs with her head in her hands. She looked up, teary-eyed, as Courtney walked towards her._

"_What's wrong?"_

"_I can't believe this is happening …" the brunette cried. "My whole world is gone … everything I have worked for is gone … shattered … all thanks to you."_

"_Sam, I …"_

"_Save it!" Sam yelled, standing up. "You just couldn't let him go could you? You couldn't be happy for him. He was so happy, Courtney! He was married, in love and we were preparing for our first child and you had to go and screw everything up! Jason was in love with me! I made him happy!"_

"_You have no idea how sorry I am, Sam" Courtney said, feeling her own eyes begin to burn with tears. "I'm horrible, okay? I'm a terrible person and if I could take back these past few months, I would do so in a heartbeat …"_

"_But you can't," Sam shot back, viciously wiping at her eyes. "I just wanted to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted. Why couldn't you leave him alone? You're the one that left him! He didn't say shit when you ran off on some whirl-wind romance with Jax! He kept his mouth shut!"_

"_All I can say is that I'm sorry," Courtney answered awkwardly._

"_Yeah, you are sorry. You know, its funny. People in this town have women like you up on a pedestal and those like me are called trash. We're sneered at and whispered about for some lousy mistake that becomes the talk of the town. Yeah, I had an affair with Sonny. I was wrong for that. But you're just as bad as me, if not, then you're worse." _

_It was that moment that Courtney had caught a glance of the front of Sam. She was no longer pregnant._

"_Where … where's the baby?"_

_Sam let out a sardonic laugh. "Oh like you don't know, already."_

"_I don't" Courtney took a step back, almost afraid of what Sam was going to say._

"_My baby … Jason's baby is gone!"_

Courtney jerked out of her sleep. She glanced at the clock. 2:17AM. She sighed as her eyes went from the alarm clock to the phone. She knew better but couldn't resist.

Courtney walked over and picked it up, dialing Jason's cell. She rolled her eyes as it went straight to voicemail. When she heard the beep, she abruptly hung up, wanting to kick herself.

She redialed and finally left a message. "Jason. It's me … can you just please call me when you get this?"

She then waited an hour on the couch, flipping through various infomercials and cheesy dating shows when finally the phone rang.

She sprung up immediately, nearly tripping on her own two feet to reach it.

"Jason?"

"No, it's me," Carly said dryly.

"Go to hell."

"While I am very sure that I'll be knocking back dirty martinis with Satan himself one day, I just thought you'd like to know that Sam just went into premature labor."


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

**A/N**: I just can't stop writing! Thank you for the reviews. And while I'm usually not biased … Suzie, your review still has me smiling :) Enjoy, everyone!

* * *

Before her friend could hang up, Carly had informed Courtney that she was actually the one to take Sam to the hospital. 

Carly had been in the hall arguing with both Sonny and Reese, when Sam had stumbled out, clutching her stomach, saying that her water had broke.

Another fight had broken out when Sonny insisted that Carly rush Sam to the hospital.

"But her water just broke … and my car is brand new …"

However, she obliged, as Sonny called Jason and then a driver for him and Reese. All three were in the waiting area when Courtney arrived.

"Jason isn't here," was the first thing said to her. This came from Reese who smiled politely after informing her.

"I'm not here to see Jason," Courtney answered. She turned to Sonny. "How's Sam?"

"What are you doing here?" he asked. She looked at him then Carly and then Reese in disbelief.

"I'm here to see about Sam! What is the big deal?"

"She had a cesarean," he replied tightly. He blinked. "You looking for Jason?"

"Oh my God," Courtney sighed. She sat down. "I'm not even going to say anything to that."

Sonny shrugged. "Then don't," he responded. He then followed Reese who was getting up to walk over to the nurse's station.

Courtney tried her hardest not to make eye contact with Carly. She was still reeling from earlier.

She watched as Carly cleared her throat then picked up a magazine, twirling her hair as she leafed through the pages. She took a sip of her coffee, finally stopping on an article.

"So you're just going to sit there?" Courtney finally asked.

Carly continued reading. "Supposedly, you're not talking to me so I don't think its fair that I have to talk to you. Thank you and leave a message."

"Fine."

"Fine … but if you're looking for another apology and for me to get on my knees in these great pants to beg for your forgiveness then you're sadly mistaken," Carly said. "I stand by my choice and I don't regret it."

"And I stand by mine, Carly, whether you like it or not," Courtney retorted. She picked up a magazine and tore through it nervously. "Ha!" she said, laughing at the page. "What a coincidence. _How To Deal With Backstabbing Friends. _Perfect."

Carly flipped a few pages. "Well … well … look at this! _What To Do If Your Best Friend Is Screwing Her Ex-Husband Who Is Married With A Baby On The Way And How To Stop Her So She Won't Screw p Her Life_. So, ha, yourself!"

Courtney threw the thin magazine down. "Carly, there is no such article. You know why? Cause in your moment of trying to ignore me, you skipped over the _Glamour _and picked up _Highlights _instead … which, by the way, you're reading upside down."

"Damn," Carly muttered. She threw the book down and watched as it slid across the table. "Look, I'm not apologizing again but-"

She stopped as Jason ran over. "Where is she?" he asked, out of breath.

"She's in Intensive Care," Carly answered.

"And the baby?"

Carly smiled. "Neonatal. She's beautiful, Jason."

Courtney offered a smile but Jason didn't even look at her. Instead, he accepted Carly's hug and walked off to find his wife and newborn.

"A girl, huh?" Courtney said quietly.

Carly nodded. "Dark hair, blue eyes. What a combination, right? Sonny thinks she looks like Sam. I say Jason but I'm biased, of course."

"That's wonderful," Courtney smiled. "Sam got her little girl. How's she doing?"

"That's another story." She shook her head. "I tell you Courtney, she was panicking. She thought she was going to die on the ride here. I've seen fewer tears at a funeral. I was just scared about my upholstery. She bled a lot and she was going in and out of it but they finally stabilized her."

"Well, that's good … what did she name her?"

"Marie. Yep, Marie Morgan. And Reese is already calling the poor thing M&M but then again, her name is Reese so go figure … speaking of that, I'd kill for an Almond Joy right now. Want anything?" She got up and began to dig around for loose change in her purse.

Courtney smiled. "No. You go ahead."

When Carly was finally out of sight, she walked over to the nurse's station where Elizabeth was standing. After much pleading, she was finally allowed back.

She stopped when she saw him. He sat on a stool, peering into the incubator. She couldn't make out exactly what he was saying but she couldn't help but smile.

When Jason turned around, she mouthed, "Hi". He smiled back and she took that as indication that the last thing on his mind was being upset with her.

Courtney gasped as she looked at the tiny infant who was nearly tangled in tubes and tape to hold them together. Her chest moved up and down slowly as she slept. Carly was right. Even while she was sleeping, Courtney could tell that the baby was beautiful.

"Congratulations," Courtney said as she pulled up a chair next to Jason's. "She's perfect."

"Except she's in here," Jason answered, running a hand over the incubator.

"She'll be fine," Courtney whispered. She took Jason's hand in hers. "You and Sam got your miracle. Be happy."

"Yeah, you're right," he answered.

The two sat in silence, watching the child sleep. Every now and then a few fingers would move or she'd breathe a little faster. Courtney watched as Jason's eyes darted back and forth, paying attention to every single thing. She sighed and looked at her watch. 4:58AM. "Look, I'm going to head back home. If you need anything … call me, okay?"

Jason nodded. When she reached the door, he called after her. She spun around at the sound of her name.

"About what happened …" he began.

She waved it off. "Don't worry about it. I was wrong … I've _been _wrong. We've both been wrong. But," she motioned over at the baby, "there's the solution right there."

* * *

After a few hours of sleep, Courtney had found herself in the corner table at Kelly's and sipping a mug of coffee. Well, actually, stirring her mug of coffee. She had a habit of using her index finger as a spoon while she people watched, a little quirk Jason always made fun of. 

Bobbie then walked over and placed a large piece of apple pie with a dish of vanilla ice cream in front of her.

"This always helps," the woman said.

Courtney shook her head. "I don't understand."

Bobbie smiled at her knowingly. "Courtney, you used to work here. You're best friends with my daughter. I've been around you for quite some time and I'd like to think that I know when something's bothering you. Besides," she unraveled silverware from the napkin, "you had the same look on your face the day after your divorce from Jason was plastered all over the papers. What's wrong?"

Courtney took and deep breath. "For the past few months, I've been having an affair with Jason."

She watched as Bobbie sat back and widened her eyes in shock. "You and Jason?" she whispered.

"Yes". She nodded. "Me and Jason."

"But Sam is-"

"Sam's pregnant. Well, not anymore. She gave birth this morning. But, yes, I've been sleeping with Jason. There you go," Courtney replied nonchalantly.

She was surprised at how calm she sounded. It was the first time she had really allowed herself to hear it out loud. But there was no point in going back now. Before she knew it, she had filled Bobbie in on everything. Details about conversations, meeting spots, Sam's naivety… everything while Bobbie sat there, speechless.

When Courtney had finally finished, she sat back, waiting for Bobbie to speak. This was usually when Bobbie would go into some great monologue, dishing out advice and solutions for the problems or, as Carly liked to call it, _"Time to think about what's for dinner"_.

But unlike Carly, Courtney would usually be all ears. Yet, this time was different. Her mind was anywhere and everywhere except where it needed to be at the moment. Yet, one thing caught her attention.

"They call it sins of the soul."

Courtney looked at her. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Sins of the soul," Bobbie repeated. "I remember when I was younger, making all of these crazy, brash decisions and a friend's mother sort of slowed me down and made me listen to her. She said that when we did things that would knowingly damage ourselves in the end, then we've committed a sin of the soul."

Courtney nodded. It made perfect sense. She didn't really think that things would be all sunshine and rainbows for her and Jason in the end, did she? Did she honestly expect Jason to leave his wife and child for her?

But that didn't matter to her anymore. First the time in what seemed like forever, Courtney wasn't worried. She was almost positive that after those few awkward moments with Jason in NICU, she wouldn't have to be concerned about any of it ever again.

* * *

Courtney waited for a few seconds, contemplating opening the door. She watched as a nurse wheeled a table of food over and refilled a water pitcher. She made notes on her clipboard then turned to walk out. Courtney caught the door before it could slam shut. Sam went to dig a fork into her food then froze as Courtney stood in front of her. 

"I brought these for you," Courtney announced, holding up a vase of lilies. "I know that you love these. I wasn't sure if Calla lilies were your favorite or if Stargazer lilies were, so I just bought the most expensive." She let out a nervous laugh as Sam smiled uncomfortably.

"You look good," she said trying not to ignore the fact that Sam's normally olive skin tone was ashen and that her hair was all piled up on top of her head. She looked like someone that had died and been dug up again, actually.

"You don't have to lie, Courtney," Sam responding. She laughed a little which lightened the mood a little more than what it should have been.

"How's the baby?"

Sam's eyes lit up and a huge smile appeared on her face. "Wonderful … everything is wonderful. Her lungs are underdeveloped but the doctors think that she'll be just fine. I just came in from seeing her."

"That's great," Courtney replied. "I was with Jason down there earlier. She's really beautiful, Sam."

The brunette smirked. "You were here earlier?"

_Great job, Courtney. _"Yeah … Carly called and told me everything so I came down here. I went to Neonatal and just saw Jason in there. We weren't in there very long. I just wanted to see how he was doing with everything."

Sam nodded. "He's worried but he isn't one to show it. I know him though. I can always tell when he's hiding something."

And suddenly a silence fell over the room. Courtney stared at her shoes, feeling Sam's eyes on her. She wasn't sure how to take the last comment. She finally decided that she was just over-reacting and cursed herself for being so damn paranoid.

She got up. "So … I'm gonna leave now. I'm sure you're probably sick of visitors. Anyways, I'm going to go put these by the window." Courtney walked over and opened the blinds, sitting the vase down carefully.

She did a small wave goodbye before reaching the door.

"Courtney?" Sam asked.

She turned around. "Yes?"

"I love that ring, by the way."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

**A/N:** Thank you for the reviews. I hope you all had a fabulous turkey day!

* * *

Courtney got up. "So … I'm gonna leave now. I'm sure you're probably sick of visitors. Anyways, I'm going to go put these by the window." Courtney walked over and opened the blinds, sitting the vase down carefully. 

She did a small wave goodbye before reaching the door.

"Courtney?" Sam asked.

She turned around. "Yes?"

"I love that ring, by the way."

Courtney clutched her thumb and watched as Sam's bright smile turned to a sly smirk.

"_No. Uh-uh," she said in a sharp tone. Her outburst received a look of confusion from Jason. "Take it off," she whispered sharply almost laughing at the authority in her voice. She beckoned at his wedding ring. Jason quickly shook his head with a small laugh and removed it. As he went to slide it under the couch, she snatched it from him, placing it on her thumb. She smiled to herself, liking the fact that he still couldn't say no to her._

"Look's like you got a new piece of jewelry there," Sam said. She didn't take her eyes off of Courtney. "Sort of a hand me down, you can say."

"Sam, I …"

"Save it, Courtney." Sam started laughing. "But I have to give it to you. You had me going for a while."

"_I'm not stupid, Courtney!" Carly yelled. "For heavens sake, you're wearing the man's wedding band on your finger!"_

_Courtney looked down at her hand. Carly was right. Her right thumb sported Jason's ring._

Sam sat up straighter in bed. "You know … I really wanted to believe you when you said that nothing was going on with you and Jason. I just said, 'Oh, Sam, you're over-reacting. They used to be married; of course, feelings are still going to linger'. I tried my hardest to look away and play dumb but that only goes so far." She watched as Courtney continued to peer down at her finger, a tear falling on the band. "Don't worry though. That didn't give it away. Nice touch, but that wasn't it. Sort of hard to ignore the longing stares … your number constantly showing up on our phone bill … a earring left in the bed that I just so happen to share with my husband … but, enough about me. I want to hear about you. How many times have you slept with Jason since he's been married to me?"

"I don't know …" was all Courtney could manage.

"Okay, well, let's try this. How long have you been sleeping with Jason?"

Courtney shrugged, feeling her nose burn as she couldn't stop the tears from forming. "A couple months … off and on …" Sam raked a hang through her hair and sighed. "Sam, I am so sorry …"

"I know you are," Sam answered.

"I don't know how everything happened but it just did. It wasn't supposed to but it just did …"

Courtney sighed deeply. It took everything in her to not turn around and run out the door, past the nurse's station and vomit in the elevator.

The little secret was out. Not exactly how she had thought it would be revealed though, she admitted to herself. She pictured her and Jason in bed and Sam walking in on them. The typical scandalous fare. Never in a million years did she ever think Sam would be in a hospital bed with her daughter fighting for her life on another floor.

"I could sit here and call you every name in the book, Courtney," Sam said, bringing her from her thoughts. "All those names you and Carly said to me … and I believe you once told me to get my trashy, home wrecking ass out of your office that one day. But I won't. I won't sit here and insult you though you've done the exact thing to me for the past few months."

Courtney swallowed. "Have you said anything to Jason?"

Sam looked at her incredulously. _That would be the first thing on her mind. _"That doesn't matter. Look, Courtney, I don't want to divorce my husband …"

"And you won't have to," Courtney said, jumping to reassure the woman. "It will not happen again, I swear.

"Oh, I know it won't. I just want you to think about that little angel who's sleeping in an incubator instead of her new bedroom."

Her answer received a sheepish nod from a tearful Courtney. "I'm really sorry, Sam," she said, taking a hand to brush across her damp face. And, as if on cue, a nurse walked in. She looked at Courtney who just nodded before walking out.

* * *

When three weeks had passed with no call or visit from Jason, Courtney realized that everything had really come to an end and was over. _Over. _But still, there was that relentless pull towards Jason. 

"Maybe if I just call and see how things are going?" Courtney said suddenly.

She and Carly sat in Kelly's at 3 in the morning, sharing a bowl of vanilla ice cream in their pajamas. Being the owner's daughter had its perks.

"You're not calling anyone!" Carly replied, shaking her spoon at Courtney in mock scolding. "You are going to sit here and forget about him."

"I can't, Carly," Courtney yelled. She threw her spoon down. "I need to know how it's going, you know? How the baby is, how…"

"How his marriage is," Carly finished. She retrieved a bottle of chocolate syrup and poured it all over her area. "Just leave it alone, Courtney. He hasn't even called you. That's saying something."

Courtney shrugged. Maybe her friend was right. Or … maybe he was just too busy.

"They have a new baby. That takes up a time …"

"_Give. it. up, _" Carly cried, stomping her feet in frustration. "You want to know what's going on then I'll tell you. Surprisingly, Sam has some actual maternal instincts. She hasn't drowned the baby while giving her a bath yet and she's been taking her to all of her appointments. Every single day there's a new package arriving and Sam even has Jason get up at 3 in the morning with the baby. Happy?"

"No," Courtney said quietly. She sighed and looked up at Carly who had a large smile plastered on her face. "What the hell is so amusing?"

"Oh, nothing," Carly answered. She shifted in her seat excitedly as she opened a fresh gallon of Neapolitan then promptly dug in, sticking her spoon into the strip of strawberry. She looked at Courtney. "Fine. Go see him … but I'm going with you."

"Carly!"

"No, Courtney," she said shaking her head. "Now, you've done well these past few weeks. This is the first time you've mentioned Jason in a while, now, I don't know what goes on behind those closed doors of yours but from what I've seen, he hasn't really been on your mind. That's good. _Progress. _Keep it up. But, like I said, if you're heading over there … then I'm following."

Little did she know, Courtney was dead serious about seeing Jason. The two argued all the way on the elevator ride up. By the time they reached Jason and Sam's doorstep, they made a compromise: Courtney could go in alone as long as she was out in 10 minutes.

But before Courtney could even raise a hand to knock at the door, she felt a presence behind her.

"Carly, I told you to stay downstairs," she said spinning around. But instead of seeing her bouncy best friend, she came face to face with a clearly irate Sam who was holding a sleeping baby Marie in her hands.

"And I told you to stay away from my husband," she said through gritted teeth.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

**A/N**: You guys have NO idea how long I have been trying to get this chapter out. I've attempted, count 'em, FIVE times. Everything from laptop crashes to the hard drive being wiped out to the laptop literally dying … I am so sorry. I really am. Anyways, finally, its here. And happy birthday, Nicole. This is for you. I luv you lots!

* * *

Before Courtney could even raise a hand to knock at the door, she felt a presence behind her. 

"Carly, I told you to stay downstairs," she said spinning around. But instead of seeing her bouncy best friend, she came face to face with a clearly irate Sam who was holding a sleeping baby Marie in her hands. She didn't even recognize the woman at first. Since when did Sam wear glasses?

"And I told you to stay away from my husband," she said through gritted teeth.

Courtney looked down at her pajamas. "Sam, this isn't …"

"Isn't what it looks like," Sam finished. She shifted the baby to her other arm. "You're standing here in your pajamas and I'm not supposed to think anything. _Right._"

"Sam …"

She stomped her foot in frustration and sighed. "Whatever … let's just pretend you're here to visit the baby, alright? I don't care. I don't care about anything anymore." She motioned to the set of keys spilling out of the pocket of her jean jacket. "You mind?"

"Oh, no." Courtney reached for the keys and briefly paused, looking at the set fondly. She ran a thumb over the gold key that unlocked the penthouse door. It had a pink dot on it and she smiled to herself, remembering why it was on there.

Jason had given her so many keys. Keys to Sonny and Carly's place, their own penthouse, the warehouse, the house on the island, his car, his bike, her car, her _other _car, the limo …

So she came up with this brilliant idea of painting a small dot of bright pink nail polish on the most important one –the key to home. She didn't even care that Jason had laughed whenever he saw it.

With a deep sigh, Courtney opened the door. The penthouse was quiet and pitch black but even in the darkness, she could see a few toys astray.

Sam placed the carrier on the table and rubbed a hand over her face. She threw off her jacket and walked over to the desk where Courtney was standing and turned on the lamp then proceeded to plop back down on the couch.

The brunette stretched her petite legs out and stared at straight ahead. "I'm so tired," she said barely above a whisper. "So tired ..."

Courtney stared at her, somewhat feeling sorry for the new mom –and somewhat wanting to laugh at the sight of Samantha Morgan in sweatpants and not a trace of thick eyeliner rimmed around her eyes.

"Well, I'm sure the first few months are tough on all parents," Courtney offered.

Sam stayed silent.

"I bet Jason's a wonderful father …"

"When he's around," Sam sighed. "Whenever that is …" She reached up to her head and began to unravel one of the two French braids that were plaited in her normally once a week salon processed tresses. No makeup, glasses and pigtails. She looked 12. If only Carly could see this.

"He's a busy man," Courtney shrugged. "You knew that when you got pregnant."

Sam perked up. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing …"

"What, you're trying to say that I got pregnant on purpose?" She got up. "Like, I tricked Jason or something? Well, I didn't."

"I know that … I was just saying …"

"You were just saying what?" Sam mocked. She took the plastic framed eyeglasses off and placed them on the table. She walked over and poured herself an ample amount of Brandy from the wet bar. "Thinking of something you heard during those late night conversations with Jason? What did he tell you, Courtney?"

"You know what? Just forget I ever said anything." She watched as the baby began to stir in her sleep and unconsciously walked over to tend to her. But before she could even reach the child, Sam snapped.

"Leave her alone," she said. "She's fine." Sam walked over and peered down at her child. "Aren't you, _darling_?" She sipped some more. "You're okay," she whispered. "Mama's here. She'll always be here."

"Courtney, you're 3 minutes-" Carly barged in and stopped when she saw Sam. "Hi …" She looked Sam up and down then looked over at Courtney with a 'what the hell' expression on her face. She then spotted the baby in her carrier and rushed over.

"Oh my God, she's beautiful!" Carly said. "Look at her! She even looks like Jason in her sleep! Oh, thank God!"

"Carly, do you mind? My child is asleep. The last thing I need is for you to wake her up. Leticia just put her to sleep."

"Isn't that your job?" Carly questioned nonchalantly, which earned a kick to the ankle from Courtney.

Sam noticed the exchange and rolled her eyes. "I was out-"

"Looking like that?"

"Carly!" Courtney cried. But her friend just shrugged innocently.

"Anyways," Sam continued. "I was out and Leticia was baby-sitting for us. Our new nanny doesn't start until next week."

"You're getting a nanny? What for?" Carly questioned.

Courtney went to speak up but decided against it. There was absolutely no point.

"Because we need one, that's why." Sam smirked and knocked back the last of her drink. "Jason is always out and sometimes I just want to be able to leave and go for a quiet dinner to myself. Is that a problem?"

"Nope, not at all. Well, you keep on drinking, hun. I'm sure Jason will love that. Courtney and I are gonna leave now." She turned around a walked out as Courtney looked up at Sam.

"Yeah, you really should stop drinking. I'm sure Jason will be home soon. You know, I used to wait up for him to come home. Of course, he couldn't tell me anything but he'd try to let me know how his day went." She smiled thoughtfully. Sam kept a smug look on her face and shrugged, clearly annoyed.

"And I'm supposed to care because …" Sam stopped herself and exhaled deeply. "Look, like you said, Jason will probably be home any minute. I'll tell him you stopped by, alright? I'm really worn out, so can you please just go?"

* * *

"Can you believe that woman?" Carly placed her feet on the coffee table that was placed in the middle of Courtney's living room. "_Leticia just put her to sleep. _Who the hell does she think she is? Me?" She looked over at Courtney who giggled as she sipped tea from a large round mug. "That's not funny." 

"Yes it is."

"She's trying to be me!" Carly suddenly sat up. "Oh my Lord! Think about it. She gets married to a rich mobster, has a kid, gets a nanny, has a wet bar in her living room … that's all Carly."

Courtney sighed and continued laughing. "Hun, that's Sam, Reese and every other woman married to a rich man in this God forsaken town."

Carly sat back relieved. "Well, if I find out that she's a natural blonde turned brunette then I'm saying something."

"Fine."

"You know what though, Courtney?" Carly asked, looking over. "Her paranoia amazes me though. I mean, she acts as if she's got nothing."

"Well, not so long ago, her husband _was_ sleeping with another woman," Courtney replied. "Can't say I blame her there."

"But that's different." Carly watched as Courtney lowered her eyes at her. "It wasn't really an affair … well, it was … but you and Jason had … No? Okay, so it was an affair. You two were wrong but it's done. Jason isn't going to leave her again. That baby is his whole world."

"Oh, I completely agree," Courtney said as a knock came to the door. "Must be that food you ordered."

"Thank God," Carly said as Courtney headed towards the door. "Who knows? Maybe the delivery guy could be your Prince Charming."

Courtney laughed. "Sounds good to me," she said opening the door –to Jason.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

**A/N**: Thanks for the reviews. They make me smile. Can I just say that I love Alexis and Nancy Lee Grahn? "I know that you think you've found the Holy Grail in Jason". Brilliant. Okay. Read.

* * *

After opening the door to Jason, Courtney spun around, hoping Carly would notice her cue to leave. But no such thing happened. 

She looked over at the two of them but didn't move. "What? I got food coming."

Courtney rolled her eyes and ushered Jason outside the door, gently closing it behind her.

"Sorry about Carly."

"Its fine," Jason replied. He shoved his hands in his coat pockets. "Sam … called and said that you stopped by."

"Oh, yeah. It was no big deal, really." Her eyes lit up. "I wanted to see the baby. Jason, she is … perfect. She's beautiful."

"Thanks," he offered quietly before looking past her and down the hall. "She's doing good. Wish I could say the same for Sam."

"Oh?" Courtney responded in false ignorance. She figured that those rumors Carly were spreading around town about Sam were, well, true after all. "She didn't look too good tonight."

"Drinking?"

Courtney nodded. "Yeah. She seems really stressed out."

Jason went to answer but his phone rang. He paused for a moment, letting it ring. He then picked it up, looking at the face of it, sighing at whoever's name he saw and placed it back in his pocket.

He exhaled deeply and shrugged. "I don't know why I came over here."

"Maybe just to get away for a little while?" Courtney offered with a slight smile. "Jason, it is perfectly alright to admit that you need a break. Everyone has their moments. Even you."

Jason smiled in response but before he couple speak, his phone rang yet again. For the second time, he let it ring until it stopped then proceeded to continue the conversation but was interrupted by Courtney.

"Is that Sam?" He nodded. "Why won't you pick up?" Courtney stopped herself before she could go on. She realized that, if anything, she was prying. Jason and Sam's problems were just that –Jason and Sam's problems. And that was if they even _had_ problems.

But if she was crossing the line, Jason didn't seem to notice. He opened up his phone. "This is why I don't answer." He dialed up his voicemail and handed the phone to Courtney.

"_Jason, it's me. I don't know why you're not answering your phone but I think it's rather shitty of you being that you have a wife and a child here at home waiting for you. Anyways, just call me back when you get this."_

The next voicemail popped up, but this time, Sam was in tears.

"_Jason, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things. I … I don't know. Just come home, alright? Please? We'll talk and-"_

Courtney handed the phone back to him. "You need to go home to your wife and child." She continued as he tried to speak. "Hey. No one ever said that this was going to be easy. You can't expect her to do this all alone. You need to be there too. Forget about Sonny and all of your so-called obligations to him. Your wife and your daughter are number one now."

Jason nodded, considering what had just been said carefully. "You're right," he finally answered with a slight smile.

"I know," Courtney answered, smiling back. "Just promise me you'll go home, okay?"

"I will. See you later."

Courtney grinned in satisfaction as she watched him walk away before going back inside her apartment.

She walked in to find Carly facing the television with a sly smirk on her face.

"Don't even start," Courtney said sitting down.

"I didn't say anything!" Carly replied ever so innocently. She looked over at her friend. "Did-"

"Stay out of it, Carly."

"But-"

"Shut up!"

"Wha-"

"Just stop!" Courtney yelled as another knock came to the door.

"My food!" Carly cried, jumping out of her seat. As soon as she went to close the door on the delivery guy, it opened back up violently, nearly knocking her to the ground.

In walked Sam, out of breath and looking even more rugged than she did earlier.

"Have you seen Jason?" she asked, sniffling. She wiped at her tears. "He won't answer my calls."

Carly looked at Courtney then back at Sam. "You've got to be kidding me …"

"No, I'm not kidding, Carly!" More tears continued to stream down her bare face. "Where is my husband? Is he here, Courtney?"

"Sam, here, sit down …"

"I don't want to sit down, Courtney!" Sam cried. "Was he here? Huh? Just tell me. Please?"

"He was," Courtney said as Carly rolled her eyes. "But he told me he was heading home."

"Oh this is just great!" Sam said, crossing her arms over her chest. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Sam, it wasn't like that …"

"Oh, because it's never like that with you, right? Give me a break, Courtney. What? Was Carly sitting here and watching?"

"I resent that comment!" Carly said from her position on the floor. She sat cross legged, digging a pair of chopsticks into a box of almond chicken. "Come on, now."

"Jason came over because he heard that I stopped by, Sam," Courtney answered. "That's it. I swear."

Sam sighed heavily. "I'm sorry," she said. "I really am. I'm just …"

"Worried," Courtney answered for her. "It's okay. Here, why don't you sit down and I get you something to drink?"

Her offer earned a scoff from Carly who's eyed widened to the size of saucers. Courtney shrugged as Sam sat down and took off her jacket.

"Vodka and Tonic, please," Sam asked still exasperated.

Courtney and Carly exchanged looks. "I actually don't … keep that kind of liquor around …"

"Maybe water? Tea?" Carly suggested. "A glass of milk? Apple juice? Orange juice? Grape juice …" Sam accepted water but that didn't last long.

Within two hours, the three women were more than relaxed as Courtney finally allowed Carly to raid her liquor cabinet. They had kicked off their shoes, giggling as they knocked back shots of whatever they could get their hands on.

If someone were to have walked in, they would have suspected that they were nothing more than old school friends catching up on old times. Not a frazzled new mom, her husband's ex-mistress and the ever-meddling best friend.

Courtney could definitely agree that it was quite the unconventional evening. And though she didn't remember much of what happened as she woke up from her champagne haze, she definitely knew that it would probably never happen again. Not that she cared anyway.

"Where's Sam?" she said, getting up from her spot on the couch and looking around the room.

Carly mumbled incoherently. She was lying on the floor, a shiny wrapper from a package of cookies stuck to the side of her face. She shrugged, still half sleep.

"Come on, Carly. Where is she?"

"_What?_" Carly yelled, turning on her other side. "Damn, I don't know where she is, Courtney. She left a couple of hours ago. I'm trying to sleep."

"Well, did you at least call her a cab?"

"Now, why would I do that?" Carly asked.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because she was, let's see, drunk?" Courtney answered. "We were all drinking. There's no way she could have driven home. How was she when she left?"

Carly kicked her feet in frustration. "_Like I care_. What are you trying to do, earn a badge in Hussy Protection? I'm sure she's fine. Just call the woman. Wake me up when breakfast is done."

Courtney went to respond but, instead, grinned as she spotted a black purse on the floor. Sam's purse.

She retrieved it and threw it at Carly, who didn't even budge. "Looks like we're going to be making a little trip to Harborview Towers."

"We?" Carly said with her eyes still shut. "No, Carly is staying on this surprisingly comfortable spot on the floor until breakfast is done."

"Fine. You sure you want me over there without a proper chaperone? Morning time … Jason in boxers …"

"I'll get my keys."

* * *

Carly and Courtney knocked repeatedly for a good five minutes before realizing that the door to the penthouse was open. 

Courtney called out for Sam and then Jason after hearing water running. Thinking it was coming from the kitchen; Courtney walked in and then walked back out.

"No one's in there," she announced. "Let's go across the hall and see if Sonny knows where they are."

"Okay, this is just stupid. I'm not interested in playing Nancy Drew. Let's go," Carly said.

Courtney looked towards the stairs. "No, wait. I think the water's going on up there."

"Well, someone's probably in the shower …"

"Do you hear that?" Courtney said, waving her hand for Carly to be quiet. She leaned towards the staircase. "The baby's crying."

She turned and started to go up the stairs as Carly followed behind her.

The entire second floor was pitch black except for the early morning rays of daylight peeping through the blinds and underneath the thin slits beneath the doors which were all closed.

Carly opened up the door to Marie's room and found the baby in her bassinet weeping uncontrollably. She scooped up the infant and looked towards Courtney just as confused as her friend was.

"I'm going to go check the bedroom," Courtney said. Carly nodded before deciding to sit down in the rocking chair placed next to the crib. But before she could even think of a lullaby to sing to the child, she heard Courtney scream.

With the baby still in her arms, she rushed into the master bedroom and found Courtney standing in the doorway leading into the bathroom.

"What?" Carly said, almost scared to. When Courtney didn't answer, she walked towards the blonde and peered into the bathroom.

"Oh my God," she whispered.

There were candles lit around the porcelain tub which was filled with clear, glistening water. The faucets of the sink were turned on as steam rose up from the water pouring out of them. The room smelled of exotic perfume as a small radio played an old jazz tune. And on the floor lied Sam, face-down in nothing but a towel.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

**A/N**: Yeah … I got nothing …

* * *

"I'm going to go check the bedroom," Courtney said. Carly nodded before deciding to sit down in the rocking chair placed next to the crib. But before she could even think of a lullaby to sing to the child, she heard Courtney scream. 

With the baby still in her arms, she rushed into the master bedroom and found Courtney standing in the doorway leading into the bathroom.

"What?" Carly said, almost scared to. When Courtney didn't answer, she walked towards the blonde and peered into the bathroom.

"Oh my God," she whispered.

There were candles lit around the porcelain tub which was filled with clear, glistening water. The faucets of the sink were turned on as steam rose up from the water pouring out of them. The room smelled of exotic perfume as a small radio played an old jazz tune. And on the floor lied Sam, face-down in nothing but a towel.

Courtney looked at Carly. Both of them exchanged looks of fear. "Do you think …"

"I don't know," Carly said. "Call her name."

"You call her name."

"No, you call her name!"

"Fine," Courtney replied before taking a deep breath and saying Sam's name. She called her again but she didn't budge. "Give me the baby and you take her pulse."

"You take her pulse."

"No, you take her pulse!"

"I'm not touching a dead body!" Carly yelled.

"Don't say that!" Courtney cried. "She's not dead. She can't be dead. Just … touch her."

But Carly refused. Instead, breaking her focus from Sam and nearly sprinting out of the room with the baby in her arms.

Courtney wanted to do the same. The last thing she wanted was to poke and prod at some woman who was, hopefully, just unconscious.

Reluctantly, she knelt down and reached a hand over to Sam's shoulder and gently nudged it. She tapped her harder but to no prevail. Frantic, she ran out of the bathroom and scrambled to call an ambulance. The next few hours became a blur. The sirens ... Sam's limp body being lifted onto a stretcher ... the uncomfortable phone call to Jason ... all a blur and all leading up until the very moment she was in. Sam's funeral.

It was a small service. Nothing special, for Jason and Sam never really socialized with the citizens of Port Charles. The few acquaintances that Sam had, other young, spirited wives married to millionaires, Jason didn't know too well. Hell, he didn't even know their names. There was never a Jackie or Anna when Sam spoke of them. No, to her they were, "the blonde with the Asscher-cut diamond ring" or "you know, the short one with the really deep tan who goes skiing in Mexico."

"I can't go in there," Carly said before walking into the chapel. "This isn't right. I hated Sam. I have no business here."

"But Jason wants you here," Courtney reassured. But in all honesty, she didn't want to sit in front of a corpse for hours on end either.

"I know that but this is ... you know. What do they say? The House of The Lord? Yes, I've learned not to screw around with him. He knows my hate for that woman in there better than anyone."

"What? Afraid God's gonna strike you by lightning?" Courtney teased.

"Don't say that!" Carly whispered sharply, looking up towards the ceiling and crossing her fingers. "You know that kind of talk scares me!"

Courtney laughed. "Fine. Look, we'll just sit in the back. No big deal. In fact, don't even look at her when we walk in. Just keep your eyes on the floor. Sound good?"

"Yes, Mother."

Courtney playfully punched her friend but immediately regretted it, along with the easy banter they were sharing. They were at a funeral, for God's sake.

As they made their way to the end aisle, Courtney spotted Jason speaking with Fr. Coates who was over the service. They made brief eye contact as Courtney sat down next to Carly, who had retrieved a pair of obituaries.

She stared at the headshot of Sam on the front. She had a mischievous grin on her face with her head tilted to the side. Courtney had recognized the picture immediately. It was one from Jason's wallet.

She watched as Monica held Marie, who was fast asleep. She, Alan and Emily were seated next to Jason in the front row while Sonny and Reese sat in the row behind.

A few people she didn't recognize filled up a few other seats. Every now and then, Carly would nudge her, asking, "Who is that?" But Courtney couldn't answer when didn't even know herself.

The service lasted just over an hour. No one got up to speak except Jason and it was just to thank everyone for attending.

As everything came to an end, Carly got up and started a conversation with a tall woman that was wearing a sparkling pair of diamonds studs, eventually ushering Courtney over.

"She's a jeweler!" Carly squealed. She grabbed the woman's wrist. "Look at this! _She _designed _this_!"

Courtney smiled politely but watched as Jason made his way from Emily to Sonny. After a few minutes, she finally decided to walk over.

Before saying anything, she embraced him in a hug. Still holding onto him, she asked, "You okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I'm good."

"You sure, Jason? You need anything?"

Jason shrugged and looked over at his daughter who had slept through the entire service. "I'm not the one who needs anything."

Courtney shifted her eyes to the direction Jason stared in. Monica was speaking with Alan and rubbing the little girl on her back as she continued to sleep. Courtney smiled at the tiny black velvet dress that adorned her body. A wide piece of satin ribbon was wrapped loosely around her waist and was tied into a bow that hung down in the back. She felt her heart drop.

"I don't know exactly what I can say to make this better for you, Jason," she said.

And, she didn't. She didn't know what to say after the ambulance had been called which is why Carly was the phone to dial Jason's number and deliver the news that Sam has been rushed to the hospital.

EMS had arrived and managed to stable Sam who was still conscience as she was lifted onto the stretcher, mumbling incoherently as tears streamed down her already damp and flushed face. Apparently, she had taken nearly a full bottle of sleeping pills and washed them down with a tall glass of Vodka.

"Who was she _kidding_?" Carly had asked from the waiting room at the hospital. "Two of those knock me out. She's only 50 pounds! What the hell was she thinking?"

They were told that she was slipping in and out consciousness in the ambulance. They had revived her once but the second time was ineffective. She was dead on arrival.

Hours later, Courtney had found herself at Carly's department, bawling her eyes out for reasons she didn't even know. Perhaps it was the thought that she could have done something better and actually help save Sam's life. Or maybe Jason being left alone with that precious little girl. Or maybe it was pure guilt over the last year. Whatever it was, it stabbed at her heart, her conscience, like a knife.

And so here she was, standing in between Carly and Reese, in the cemetery located behind Queen of Angels Church. After her conversation with Jason, she reluctantly agreed to attend the burial.

She kept her eyes on him the entire time as Fr. Coates said the last prayer. Now, her ex-husband was never one to express much emotion. He could be the happiest person in the world and still wear the same solid expression on his face. But there was something different about Jason today. He looked solemn as usual but it was as if there was something shut down in him.

Courtney continued to look at him as Sam's coffin was slowly lowered into the ground, only taking her focus off of him as Carly elbowed her and whispered, "If this isn't a sign that you and Jason belong together then I don't know what is."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

**A/N**: It's, uh, been a while … It's gonna be a short one because of reasons I cannot reveal. Haha. Just take this chapter as a filler chapter.

* * *

Much to Carly's dismay, Courtney had kept her distance from Jason in the weeks following Sam's death. She had ran into Jason only once and that was in Kelly's when he was picking up an order. Their conversation was short. Just a quick "Hello. How are you?" sort of thing. And instead of going with Carly's suggestion of sending a "Thinking of You" sympathy card, she had just decided to call him about two weeks after Sam's funeral just to ask if he or the baby needed again. The small chat ended with Courtney promising to always be there for him as well as little Marie. 

But Courtney's plan to avoid Jason didn't last as long as she had planned.

"I don't see why you just can't take Sam's death as a sign that you and Jason belong together," Carly blurted out as the two sat on a wooden bench near the docks one windy afternoon. "Just swoop in and live happily ever after."

"How many times do I have to tell you that we're not discussing this? It's morbid and wrong," Courtney answered. She pulled her coat tighter around her and sighed.

Carly shifted to turn towards her friend. An evil grin spread across her face. "Don't you get it? You can have everything. The guy, the adorable little girl-"

"Stop!" Courtney yelled but Carly continued.

"God. Yes! _God_ has given this to you," the brunette cried. "The one thing you've always wanted with Jason was a family and, now, here it is. A lovely, beautiful blessing in disguise. I don't understand why you can't just … show up to the penthouse or call Jason and innocently ask him for a date. You know, convince him that he needs a break and then suggest that you go to dinner or something."

Courtney stared at her in disbelief for a moment then looked away, focusing on the water in front of them. "It's not that simple, Carly," she answered quietly.

"Why not?"

"Because," she replied flatly. "I just know that something would go wrong. We'd get into an argument over his life, I'd walk out and it'd be horrible because I'd have already bonded with Marie and-"

"Oh, stop," Carly replied, rolling her eyes. "Why must you always be such a damn pessimist? Try optimism for once. It's a lot sunnier on this side of the street."

Courtney laughed. "Just for that ridiculous comment, I am going to make sure that I stay as far away from Jason as I possibly can."

But in a town like Port Charles, that proved to be impossible. One hour later, she was face to face with ex. Well, sitting across from him was more like it.

Carly had dragged her into Kelly's only to remember that she had a hair appointment scheduled. And, as if on cue, Jason was walking in as Courtney was walking out.

Within minutes, he had invited her to sit down with him as he ordered his usual –Pigs in a Blanket.

She frowned as the waitress sat the sizzling plate in front of him.

"Why did you order that?"

He looked up and shrugged. "I always order this."

"It's 4 in the afternoon."

"Breakfast is 24 hours at Kelly's."

"Just because it's available doesn't mean you should eat it."

"And just because Fruity Pebbles are available at 3 in the morning doesn't mean you should eat it either … but you do."

"You win," Courtney said. "So, where's Marie?"

"Over at Sonny's". She watched as Jason ignored his knife, deciding to cut his food with his fork instead. And though it was one of the few things that used to irk her about him, she found herself smiling at it. "Michael and Morgan really like having her over and Leticia doesn't mind."

"That's great," she replied, her thoughts drifting back to Carly and the talk they had earlier. "So do you … you know, ever get a break?"

Jason shrugged selflessly. "I don't really care," he answered.

"Sure you do," Courtney said, knowing good and well he didn't. "I know that you're not a big social person, Jason, but come on. Away from work, you're always tending to a baby. You need some downtime."

She then interrupted him as he began to protest, blurting out, "Let's go to dinner."

And never quite getting rid of the soft spot he always held for his ex-wife, Jason couldn't help but oblige.

Hours later, the two found themselves seated in a dimly lit area of Metro Court. Courtney hadn't said anything to Carly about the date, if that's what you could call it.

This … meeting was quite possibly the most uncomfortable Courtney had been with Jason since first becoming acquainted with him that morning at Kelly's.

They sat across from one another, engaging in small talk which ended as soon as it started. Both looked uncomfortably at parts of the room, not sure what to do. Things were noticeably different.

After nearly an hour of having the urge to light the tablecloth on fire just for excitement, Courtney had come to a conclusion that she had been fighting for months. A conclusion that she had yet to admit to herself and that was that they just couldn't be friends. And the revelation of that prompted her to suddenly want to go home.

Jason was somewhat shocked when Courtney abruptly asked him to take her home, apologizing the entire ride.

Somewhat relieved, Jason shrugged off her guilt-ridden apologies.

"No big deal," he said as they reached her doorstep.

Courtney walked into the darkness of her penthouse, leaning against the wooden door for support, suddenly feeling weak because of realizing yet another revelation: Carly was right. This was indeed her chance to be with Jason again.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

**A/N**: Sorry it took forever and a day yet again. But, hey, there are worst things in the world … like Alexis giving birth to the demon spawn …

* * *

Within weeks, Courtney had quietly eased herself into Jason and Marie's life. It wasn't nearly forced though or even contrived. It was quite natural actually. Jason was happier than she had seen him in a long time. Marie had taken a liking to her … and, of course, Carly was thrilled. 

But Carly was the last thing on Courtney's mind. Between late-night dinners, talks on the docks and even early morning breakfasts at Kelly's, Courtney and Jason were spending nearly every free moment they had in the presence of one another. And both enjoying it a little more than either would have admitted.

It was somewhat like old times … only with a baby –the way Courtney had wanted it to be.

Most days were spent playing Nanny though, while Jason was out, like the day Carly decided to pop up unexpectedly.

"Oh, I knew you'd be here," Carly announced plopping down on the couch. "This is getting serious. Like my new dress?"

Courtney rolled her eyes. "I don't actually. And nothing is getting serious. Jason and I …"

"… Have sex when Marie falls asleep …"

"No! Jason and I are simply … sharing parental duties." Courtney looked over at the infant. "I mean, think about it, Carly. She doesn't have a mother. Jason is hardly home and Leticia has enough on her hands. I'm just helping out."

"Anyone ever tell you that you're a shitty liar?" Carly replied kicking her shoes off. "You can tell me."

"That's all," Courtney answered. "This arrangement is strictly platonic. I'm here to help. That is _all_."

"Sure you are," Carly grinned. "For now. But, look at you. You're attached to that child and pretty soon she's gonna be calling you Mommy. Look around. There's not one trace of Sam in this house. You're not going to be content just being Courtney, the help, for too long."

"I'm happy …"

"You're falling back in love and this time, you're getting the guy _and _the baby. An instant family! You're not fooling anyone. Just get him to marry you and make it official. Plus, you get a brand new ring _and_ wedding presents. How long do you expect this to go on?"

"However long she wants."

Carly's eyes widened as she and Courtney both turned towards the door to see Jason standing there.

"I was just … you know …" Carly started.

"Helping baby-sit?" Jason asked, walking in and shutting the door behind him.

"Or just leaving …" Courtney said.

Carly looked at the both of them and smirked. "Right. Just leaving."

She grabbed her things and walked towards the door, humming "Going to the Chapel" as she walked out.

"I'm really sorry if you heard any of that conversation," Courtney said with a nervous laugh. "You know how Carly is."

Jason shrugged. "Don't worry about it." He looked down on the floor which was partially covered with a baby blanket and had pieces and crumbs of graham cracker strewn here and there. "What's this?"

Courtney's eyes followed his to the floor as she felt her cheeks burn with embarrassment. "Oh, nothing. I was just experimenting with Marie …" She watched as Jason's eyes widened. "Okay, that didn't come out right. I was …" She sighed when a grin spread across Jason's face. "I was trying to get her to crawl by … bribing her with pieces of graham crackers."

"Graham crackers?"

"Graham crackers. I was on the phone and we were both sort of down on the floor and she looked like she was going to crawl, I swear. But she didn't, well, not really. Every time she looked like she was coming towards me, she would just topple over or stop so I got this idea and went into the kitchen and I grabbed the crackers and then I crumbled them up because I realized that she didn't have any teeth so how could she chew and why are you about to laugh at me?"

"I want to see this," Jason said going over to his daughter. "I want to you to show me."

"No …"

"Yeah. I do." He gently picked up the infant and placed her on the pink blanket.

Courtney reluctantly followed. She watched as the tot looked at her then Jason and then spontaneously toppled over on her side.

"Good job," Jason said turning to Courtney.

As he did, Marie regained her balance, turning over on her stomach, seemingly getting in position to crawl.

"See! Look!" Courtney cried, pointing. But as soon as she got Jason's attention, the toddler paused. "You've gotta be kidding me."

Jason laughed. "Its no big deal. So, why did Carly stop by?"

"Typical Carly. Bored. Nosy. Meddling." Courtney shook her head. "She has this crazy idea that we should get married."

"What's so crazy about it?" Jason asked nonchalantly.

Courtney stared at him. "You don't think its crazy …"

"No." He dug into his pocket and placed a tiny box into her hands. "If I did then I wouldn't have bought this."

Courtney slowly opened the velvet box revealing a sparkling ring that would put the one that Jax had bought her to shame.

She thought back to Carly.

"_You're falling back in love and this time, you're getting the guy and the baby. An instant family! You're not fooling anyone. Just get him to marry you and make it official. Plus, you get a brand new ring and wedding presents. How long do you expect this to go on?"_

Apparently not too long.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

**A/N**: Okay. I have a confession to make: I have completely jumped on the CBS wagon. I am officially Y&R's BITCH. I love this show like I loved GH during the Fab 4 days … and that's a lot of love. So, go ahead. Call me a traitor! Send me spam! BUT, I still heart my favorite blue-eyed couple. SO, with that being said, here is the next chapter. Sorry it's taken forever to update. No, really. I am.

* * *

Courtney pulled the covers from over her head and looked at the clock. 4:31 PM. She groaned. This plan to sleep for the rest of her days wasn't going as well as she had planned. 

She slowly pulled her left hand from underneath the soft lavender blanket and stared at the ring on her wedding finger.

It was thick and platinum and encrusted with far too many diamonds to even begin counting. It was gorgeous. It was romantic. It was depressing as hell.

"Why, Jason?" she said to herself.

Why on earth would he want to get married to her again? Especially after everything they had been through before?

His lifestyle wasn't any different and he sure as hell wasn't going to change now.

"_You want to marry me?" Courtney asked, nearly wanting to pinch herself. "Why?"_

"_What? You think I already have a wife or something?"_

"_That's not funny, Jason," she said. "You realize what you're asking, right? You're asking me to become your wife. To become Marie's mother."_

Yeah, Jason definitely understood what he was saying. Which is why he sat there, waiting for an answer until Courtney finally gathered something to say.

"_This is a really, really big step, Jason …"_

"_Nothing we haven't done before."_

_He watched as she shifted uncomfortably, still staring at the ring._

"_A week."_

"_Excuse me?" she said, turning to him. _

"_I'll give you a week to give me an answer."_

That week had shriveled into exactly 3 hours and 43 minutes. For the past few days, she had kept to herself –literally. She hadn't left her apartment and her cell phone was nowhere in sight.

Of course Carly had barged in, complete with threats about finding new friends who could find time for her.

But not even an answering machine message from Mike asking for a lunch date could pull Courtney out of bed.

Her only movement consisted of cracking her toes, trying to untangle her hair that hadn't been combed for days and, of course, reaching for the phone then dialing Jason's number and then proceeding to hang up by the first ring –something she had done 5 times already.

And then suddenly she thought of Jason and his odd yet undeniably charming way of proposing –if one could call it that. Sure he hadn't gotten down on one knee in a brand new tuxedo with candles lit everywhere. But it was Jason and she couldn't expect anything more. Not that she really wanted to. Jason had his own way of doing things and that was one of the things she loved most about him.

She smiled at the thought of him in a jewelry store, hesitant to ask a female employee for help and maybe a few suggestions. He was a bit weird in that sense to everyone else. But Courtney found it strangely … endearing.

Perhaps that was what finally pulled her out from under the covers and threw her into the shower as time began to wind down.

* * *

Courtney smiled as a young waitress came from inside of Kelly's and sat down a bowl in front of her. 

"Thank you," she said quietly before peering down at her watch.

She had a little over twenty minutes left and had yet to make a decision.

"You shouldn't be out here alone," Courtney heard a voice say from behind her.

She turned around and smiled. "Don't you ever get sick of saying that?"

"No," Jason said sitting down in front of her. "Are you okay?"

She shrugged. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Jason motioned towards the bowl in front of her. "Cause whenever you're down about something to come to Kelly's really late, eat vanilla ice cream outside and read _Gone With The Wind_."

Courtney forced out a laugh as she glanced down at the thick book on her lap. "I guess you're expecting an answer."

"I guess I am."

"The deadline's not here yet." She straightened up. "So technically we can talk for a little while."

A slight grin appeared on Jason's face. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Everything," Courtney answered with a sigh. "I mean, we both know how big of a deal this is. And I just want to make sure that you're –we're, in it for the right reasons … that is, _if _I say yes."

"And I know you're not doing this just because you want a mother for Marie," Courtney continued as Jason was about to talk. "I know that you would never do that. But when this marriage happens –if it happens, I would love every minute I had with her because she'd be my daughter. And we'd take her on trips and I'd put her in the cutest little dresses and …"

"Courtney--"

"And when you're not working, we'd try to spend every minute we had together and every Saturday morning we'd eat breakfast in bed and talk about the most random things like we used to when we were married before …"

"Courtney." Jason grabbed her hand and laughed. "All I need is a yes or a no."

"Fine," she replied with a smile. "You want your answer? Well, here it is, Morgan…" She looked down at her watch and waited until the last 7 seconds ran out.

"Yes," she said with a laugh. "I'll marry you."


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38**

**A/N**: Sorry for the long, long, long, long, long, long wait. I truly am. But look at the brightside folks –we saw McSteamy in a towel! Bow chica bow wow!

* * *

"So what about this one?" 

Courtney emerged from the dressing room and spun around proudly.

Carly scrunched up her nose. "I hate it." She watched as her friend rolled her eyes then turned towards the mirror. "I hate the back too."

"Well, I like it," Courtney said to her reflection in the mirror. "In fact, I love it." She put both hands on her hips and smiled.

After getting over the thrill of Courtney choosing her as her maid of honor, again, Carly had gone overboard with wedding plans …again.

"Personally, I think it's ugly," Carly replied as she strategically pinned a long veil on top of her dark curls. "No offense."

"Personally, I don't think you're the one getting married," Courtney said with a wink. "No offense."

The dress was long and slim fitting. It was an off-white color with a jeweled bodice and deep v-neck held together by thin straps.

"The ceremony is going to be small, Carly," Courtney said as she adjusted the top. "It's going to be me and Jason and a few guests. Nothing big. Simple, short and sweet."

"But don't you want a big wedding?" Carly's eyes roamed over to a pair of long satin gloves. She squealed with excitement and began to put them on. "You've never had a big wedding so here's your chance. I mean, I can rip everything up and we can start from scratch…"

"No, no, no. I don't want a big wedding. Jason doesn't want one either and knowing him, he would be--"

"Perfectly okay with going to a Justice of Peace and going the easy route," Carly finished. "We know, we know. But, Courtney this is Port Charles. You need to have a big wedding. Otherwise, how will Helena poison the cake or a presumed dead wife show up …"

She bit her tongue as soon as the words came out.

Courtney's eye diverted down as she slowly turned from the mirror and towards Carly.

"I am so sorry."

"No, you're fine." Courtney shrugged. "Sam had to come up at some point, right? I mean, after all, I am about to marry her husband and become the mother of her child."

"Sam is gone, alright?" Carly replied sternly. She gently grabbed Courtney's hands. "Listen to me. Yes, Sam's dead. It's sad but its reality. Jason isn't Sam's husband anymore. He is your fiancé. And that little girl is your daughter now. So instead of standing here and getting ready to pout over Sam's precious memory, God forgive me for saying that cause I didn't mean it the way it sounded, you need to be happy. You're getting married to the only man you've ever really loved for the second time. Things like that don't just happen, you know."

Courtney smiled through her slight tears. "You're right. You're absolutely right."

"Of course, I'm right," Carly said. She wrapped her arms around Courtney for a tight hug. She began an obnoxiously loud performance of humming the Wedding March.

A woman perusing through a rack of gowns looked over at them and glared.

"Is there a problem?" Carly asked staring at the customer. "She's getting married and we're happy. Is there a problem?"

"Carly don't--"

"No, I'm merely expressing my happiness over my best friend getting married and I'm being stared down like I have another head growing out of my neck!" She scoffed. "How rude can you be? This is a bridal boutique; we're supposed to be happy right? What a disgusting attitude. Clearly, that's why you're still a bridesmaid."

* * *

A week after Courtney had agreed to marriage, she found herself moving into the penthouse. 

Surprisingly, she was alone. She accidentally on purpose gave Carly the wrong date for her move-in. And Jason … well, he was Jason. His schedule was random so he'd pop in whenever he could.

He would sit for a few minutes, eat a sandwich, poke fun at a pair of underwear that was peeking out of a box and then off he'd go.

So many a nights, like this one in particular, she would be by herself. If she wasn't unpacking box after box, then she was fixing up a room or thinking of ways to cover up Sam's hideous interior design work.

Admittedly she felt bad over the latter but she refused to live in a residence where one room was painted dark blue with white polka dots. That just wasn't going to work.

After hours of marking down little notes to herself such as, "Remove mustard colored blinds in kitchen ASAP" Courtney found herself turning in. It had been quite a long day. She had nearly brought her entire loft over without much help. So, she made herself a drink and slipped under the covers.

She smiled to herself, looking around the room. It was all just so familiar. So familiar and completely unadulterated this time around. There was no cause to feel guilty or any sort of remorse. It was wonderful.

As usual, Jason had returned home a few hours later to a sleeping Courtney. And, like, every night, he wrapped his arms around her once he got into bed.

"Are you all in once piece?" Courtney asked not fully awake.

Jason laughed. "Yeah."

"Perfect," she replied.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 40**

**A/N: **And away we go ...

* * *

"Suck it in!" 

"I … can't! It … hurts!"

"You have to or you'll be wearing jeans down the aisle!"

Courtney pulled away from Carly and struggled to breathe. "Just hold on a second."

She plopped herself down on the floor of the bridal shop. "Why won't the dress fit?" She could feel herself start to panic. "Tell me why it won't fit, Carly."

"Maybe they brought out the wrong dress," Carly said sitting down next to Courtney. "Where's that salesgirl? Who knows? Maybe someone, I don't know … got the same dress, got alterations done … or … or maybe they just messed up. They took too much in. We'll just demand that they fix it today so it'll be ready for the wedding. It's not a big deal."

"It is a big deal!" Courtney screamed. "It's my wedding dress! The wedding is in three days!"

For the first time Carly could ever recall she was speechless. She watched as Courtney buried her face in her hands and began crying which turned into bawling. Her entire body shook with tears as she began wailing.

"This is what I get … it's karma …"

Carly remained quiet. _Karma_. Admittedly she wasn't a big fan of that whole what goes around comes around razzle-dazzle bullshit but for a split second, she could understand Courtney's point of view.

For nearly two weeks little by little, Courtney's world was starting to seemingly unravel.

First it was small things like her dropping a brand new vase and it shattering into a million pieces.

Then there was that time when she was washing dishes while on the telephone and, oblivious to the temperature, immersed her right hand into scolding hot dishwater and suffered burns.

And then she slipped that one day and nearly cracked an ankle … totaled her car on the way home from an appointment with a cake decorator … dropped a jar of pickles on her toe …yeah, Carly could definitely understand.

"This is all doomed, Carly," Courtney said wiping at her tears. "It's all doomed."

* * *

Unlike most people, it was during high times of stress that Courtney's imagination was most vivid –but only at night. 

Minutes after she would fall asleep her mind would drift to the furthest of places.

She would have recurring dreams about the upcoming wedding. The ceremony would start out perfect until someone would object. Or Jason would be saying his vows until she'd glance over his shoulder and see Sam staring at her through a window of the church.

Other nights were like this one. She'd slowly open her eyes and see Sam in the room.

As always, she was in a black dress and her figure would be luminous; almost glowing. Once she was at the foot of the bed. Another time she was standing in the doorway. Tonight, she was peering out the window.

She never spoke. Just exchanged stares with Courtney, who would shut her eyes out of fear and try her hardest to fall back asleep.

This time, Courtney froze in her spot in bed. She closed her eyes and whispered, "Sam?"

She sighed and opened her eyes back up when, obviously, there was no answer. Sam was gone.

Courtney heard noise from downstairs when she realized that Jason must have finally gotten in.

She looked at the clock and sighed. It was almost five in the morning.

Slipping on a robe, she slowly made her way down the stairs and stopped when she saw Jason on his cell phone. When he heard her, he motioned for her to come over and she walked into his arms.

Courtney watched as he hung up the phone. "I just saw Sam," she said flatly before walking over to the couch and sitting down.

"You saw Sam?" Jason replied unable to believe the words coming out of his mouth. "Did you go out for drinks?"

She looked up and saw him trying not to laugh. "I'm being serious! I just saw your dead ex-wife for about the fifth time in our bedroom."

Jason exhaled deeply and sat down on the couch next to her. He still couldn't believe the conversations. "Sam's dead, Courtney" he said quietly.

"I know that and you know that but …"

"Does she know that?" Jason put his head down and tried to stifle another laugh. "I'm sorry," he said as Courtney got up. "Alright, I'll be serious." He cleared his throat.

"Jason, I know how insane this sounds," she said. "But I saw her. I _saw _Sam." Courtney saw Jason struggle for something to say. "Look … I know that I'm seeing things or whatever, I don't know, but I've also been having dreams about her."

"Well, does she ever say anything?"

"No! That's just it. She says absolutely nothing. She just stares with this blank expression on her face … maybe she's trying to tell us something, you know. Maybe… maybe, she's trying to give us a warning about this marriage… maybe she doesn't want us to get married or …"

"Okay, okay, calm down," Jason said as he walked her over to the couch. They both sat down. "Sam's dead, Courtney," he whispered.

"I know," Courtney said shifting in her spot. "I know that. I'm sorry. I'm being stupid."

Jason laughed. "You're not being stupid." His expression changed. "You're not getting cold feet are you?"

"No! Of course not!" She took his hand in hers. "I cannot wait to marry you."

* * *

A smile was plastered on Courtney's face. 

She turned to her right to face Carly. "Five times in one day," she grinned.

"Five times?"

"Five times in one day Jason has said 'I love you.'" Courtney laughed when Carly rolled her eyes. "Isn't it sweet though? It's like he can't say it enough. Like I'm going to forget if he doesn't say it."

"You know," she continued. "What they say is _so_ true: love is grand. Love is beautiful. Love can conquer all. Love is--"

"Please just shut up," Carly replied sweetly, her eyes closed. "Can we just have these last few hours to ourselves without you gushing over how great Jason is?"

She resorted to imitating Courtney. "_Carly, oh my god! Jason told me he loved me five times today. Carly, Jason poured my cereal for me this morning. Carly, Jason let me drive his bike. Carly, Jason doesn't make fun of my underwear anymore. He thinks Hello Kitty is cute now._"

"Okay, how about you shut up," Courtney replied.

Carly giggled and then let out a sigh. "Well, I guess you win."

Courtney laughed. "Win what?" She reached for her glass and crossed her legs on the floor.

After the final rehearsal dinner for the impending nuptials, the two had ordered in and found themselves talking for nearly four hours in Courtney's empty loft.

"Oh, you know what I'm talking about," Carly picked a pepperoni off her slice of pizza and pointed it at Courtney. "You're getting married again and I'm still single."

"This was not a competition!"

"Oh, yes it was!" Carly said. "You snag a man, a baby and a ring all within a few months and all I have is my stupid new cat. I haven't seen him in two days by the way."

Courtney rolled her eyes. "Well, you know Jason and I will have you over anytime you want. Just don't call at 4 in the morning like you did the first time around. I love you but damn was that annoying."

"Oh, shut up." Carly looked around.

She had helped herself to most of Courtney's furniture and even packed a few of the boxes that were scattered around.

"Why do you have to go and get married anyway?" Carly asked lying on the floor. "Marriage is dumb."

"Wait a minute! You were the driving force behind all of this!" Courtney cried, sliding down next to Carly.

"What happened to single forever?"

"You wouldn't stop raiding my fridge at 2 in the morning."

"Shut up."

"You sound like Jason."

"Why'd you have to bring him up?"

"Cause he's gorgeous, that's why." Courtney looked over at Carly who had her eyes closed and her arms across her chest like a young child. "You're such a baby."

Carly remained silent.

"You're really upset aren't you?"

"No," Carly replied, her eyes still shut. "Maybe. It'll just be different. I can't just hang out over here anymore. I'll actually have to get in my car and drive to visit you. No more morse code with broomsticks. You're a penthouse wife again. Booo." She suddenly perked up. "Do you remember how you and Jason used to pretend you two never fought? Those have got to be some of my best memories living in that penthouse across from you two."

"You got joy from Jason and me arguing?"

"No!" Carly sat up. "But it would be so obvious. Sonny and I would come over to the penthouse and he'd keep calling you, 'Honey' and you'd be speaking to him through gritted teeth standing over by the fireplace and not moving."

"Remember that one time you got really, really drunk during dinner with us and you suddenly blurted out how good Jason was in bed? Sonny was furious!"

Carly stopped laughing. "Game over," she said lying back on the floor. "Screw what Sonny says. That was an accident."

"Sure it was." Courtney looked at the box of pizza sitting on plastic crates. "I should be starving myself. I have a wedding dress to fit into tomorrow."

"Ah, who cares."

* * *

"I'm thinking this is the last time I'm ever going to have to do this," Carly said. She stood back and looked at the site in front of her: Jason in a suit. Nice. 

"Damnit, it's still crooked," she said reaching for his tie.

"Carly it's fine," Jason said. "And, yes, it'll will be the last time for all of this"

"It better be." She grinned. "Are you ready?"

Jason shrugged. "Been here before. Twice."

Carly groaned. "Do you ever get excited over anything besides shiny guns and prison cells?"

"Not really," Jason replied. He walked towards the mirror. "I hate dressing up."

"Well, I think this could be considered an exception," Carly answered.

She wanted to tell him how great he looked but was worried he'd take it the wrong way –especially since he and Courtney had obviously joked about the things she said when she was completely incoherent which wasn't her fault of course.

"I should go see Courtney," Jason said heading to the door. "I haven't seen her since yesterday morning."

Carly ran after him and blocked the door. "You will do no such thing! It's bad luck."

"Carly. We've done this before. I don't think the superstition still exists."

"Will you just cooperate?" She groaned. "Courtney was with me last night and I wouldn't let her call you because it was a girl's night. But don't get upset or anything. All she did was talk about you and the wedding and the honeymoon and the flowers."

"Fine," Jason said throwing up his hands.

"Good boy." Carly looked around the tiny room for her purse. When she finally found it, she pulled out an envelope. "I shouldn't give this to you." She handed it to Jason. "It's from Courtney."

"How come you didn't want to give it to me?"

"Because it's cheesy," Carly replied flatly. "She stayed up all night writing you some sappy letter because she missed you _so _much. She wouldn't even let me read it!"

"Well good for her." Jason took the envelope and looked at Carly quickly reminding himself that she wasn't one for getting a cue. "Am I a 5-year-old or are you going to let me read this letter alone?"

"_Okay_," Carly sighed. "But hurry up so we can get this show on the road."

Jason sat down and opened the envelope:

_Jason –_

_By the time you read this, we will be heading down the aisle … for our third time. Well, technically cause that first time didn't work out and all. But, anyways, as I sit preparing for the next few hours, I can't help but wonder what exactly tomorrow will bring us. When the vows are said and the guests are finished dancing, we'll actually have a life to begin again. And this time around, it's not just about you and me. It's about Marie and her well-being. It's also about a brand new chapter. Family trips, registering for kindergarten … it's all so much! It makes me step back and take a look at what we're really getting ourselves into. When I look back on the past year and a half, I can't help but want to laugh and cry all at once. Alright, maybe I shouldn't have the urge to laugh but Sam in pigtails and glasses … hilarious. Tears are normal though. Right? Whether it was Sam's not-so-surprising death or honestly believing that you and I would never get to where we are, I admit to shedding more than a few tears. It also brings me back to a conversation I had with someone a while back. She said to me: "When we do things that we know will damage ourselves in the end then we've committed a sin of the soul." It's something that has stuck with me since the day I heard it; constantly echoing in the back of my mind. That conversation has petrified me to the point where I couldn't even tell you all of this to your face. You'll be my husband soon and I can't even share my hopes and fears with you, something I've never had a problem. I realize I'm not an expert in decision making but I figure I'll take one last chance and follow something that I should have done all those months ago: I'm going to listen to that small voice inside my head, turn around and not look back. _

_--Courtney_

++++ **THE END** ++++

**A/N: **I was serious when I said "And away we go …" Haha. But I do want to thank you all for reading and taking the time to review. I can't believe I have a completed story on FF! How crazy. Anyways, it's been a great ride. A sequel? Maybe. Probably ;)


	40. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

**A/N**: Okay, I know that Sins of the Soul is, technically, complete but you guys responded so well to the way I wrote Carly that I wanted to publish a chapter strictly centered around her. This is Carly's POV of the saga that was Sins of the Soul. I hope you all enjoy it!

Nicole, this is for you!

**Epilogue**

So, I bet you all are thinking, "Oh, those crazy lovebirds … did they ever make it to happily ever after?"

Well, I'll tell you. In a minute. Okay, maybe in a few minutes.

After all the invitations had been sent out and all the bubbly had been poured into those fancy little glasses and Monica worrying if she looked fat in her Mother of the Groom dress, which she totally did by the way, I handed that little letter to Jason.

Beforehand, though, I tried like hell to get Courtney to let me read it. We even got into a little innocent shoving match over it.

"It's personal", she said. "_Very_ personal."

"What did you write?" I asked, trying desperately to hold it up to the light in the room. "Some X-rated note? Come on, Courtney! Just let me open it!"

"No!"

"Fine!" I turned to walk away before quickly looking back. "Please?"

"No!"

So I gave up. I figured that I'd just dig in Jason's tuxedo pocket or something during the reception. He probably wouldn't notice.

After all, it was a note; not a gun.

If only ... But, we'll get to that later. I promise.

I'm guessing that you want my opinion on the whole situation.

Now if you know anything about me, I try and keep to myself. I don't meddle in other's people's business, contrary to what most say. And think.

Well, okay, maybe that's not entirely true. But, I only stick my nose in where it should belong and that entire Jason, Courtney and Sam mess was my business whether you and your mother and her cousin Ida thinks so or not. But seriously, it was.

Everyone makes mistakes but once in awhile, we all make that one error that snowballs into something epic—and this was epic.

A top secret affair, the wife suddenly ends up dead, the two passionate lovers finally confess their everlasting love to one another … it's better than any of my grocery store romance novels put together.

But back to everything …

Anyways, once Jason kicked me out of the room after I gave him the note I tried like hell to press my ear against the door, hoping he would read it out loud. But then I realized this was Jason Morgan. He could be on fire and simply shrug it off.

So I sighed loudly, pacing outside the door. I cracked my knuckles out of anticipation. For whatever reason, I get excited over things like this. A secret note? It was practically like Christmas morning.

Suddenly I saw the door knob begin to turn and a huge smile spread on my face before it fell.

"Where's Courtney?" Jason asked with an expression on his face that even I couldn't identify.

"She's in the bridal suite upstairs. What's wrong?" I asked following him as he broke into a sprint up the spiral staircase.

"Nothing," he called out. "Just go tell everyone that we'll be getting started a little late."

"No, I'm following you!" I said still running behind him. "What's going on?"

He stopped and turned towards me. "No, you're not. Go out there and tell everyone we're starting late," he said before turning back.

"Fine then!" I yelled out, stomping down the stairs nearly tripping on the Maid of Honor dress that I was too nice of a person to admit that I hated.

When I opened the doors to the church, I told myself the universal groans weren't personal -- just disappointed because it wasn't Jason.

Tough crowd, I guess.

"Well, everyone," I said as I moved towards the front. "We'll be getting started a little late. Don't worry."

"Is everything alright?" Monica called out.

I shrugged. "Hell, if I know." And I didn't. Like, I said, I don't meddle into other people's lives.

I stood for a few minutes longer contemplating what to do next. I considered breaking out into song. Maybe doing a little dance. After all, that's what always happened in the movies.

But I'm not one to follow the crowd -- so I bolted and made a quick dash to the winding staircase that lead up to the bridal suite.

I tip-toed up to the door before finally getting on all-fours to place my ear as close as it could to the bottom of the door.

I heard nothing.

Damnit.

I looked around for a glass to place against the door but found myself out of luck. The suspense was killing me.

Finally, I brought myself to knock on the door.

"Go away, Carly!" Courtney yelled.

"But--"

"Leave!" Jason responded.

Normally I would have protested a bit more. But something in the tone of their voices told me they were very serious. Unfortunately, I had nothing to do but sit in front of the door like a dog -- or a puppy, rather. They're much cuter.

So, I sat cross-legged on the floor. I sure as hell wasn't going back into that chapel.

After what seemed like a good half an hour, the door finally flew open and Jason walked out, storming down the stairs without a single word.

I didn't know whether to go after him or go see Courtney. I chose the latter, figuring she would be easier to talk to.

Courtney had her back towards me as I walked in. She sat at the vanity, painting her nails. She seemed her normal self. No trace of tears or distress.

"Is everything okay ...." I started before she looked up and stared at me from the mirror.

"Yeah," she said. "Everything is fine."

"Then why did Jason run out the door like he was on an order from Sonny?", I replied.

She sighed lightly. "I guess ... because I called the wedding off?" She shrugged like nothing was wrong.

The words took about 10 seconds to sink in. "You what?"

She looked at me through the mirror and repeated herself.

"Wait ... wait ... wait ... you can't call off the wedding. You're in love with Jason...he gave you a really pretty ring...Marie loves you...there are tons of people waiting for you...I paid for a bridesmaid dress!"

"Sorry," was all Courtney said before returning to her nails.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I said walking over to her. When she didn't answer me I snatched up the bottle of nail polish. "Did you hear me? What the hell is wr--"

I stopped myself. The note ...

"What did the note say?" I demanded. "Tell me what the note said."

"It said I didn't want to get married," Courtney answered. "I can't get married, Carly."

Finally she turned to me and stood up. "I can't do it. I don't think I'm ready for all of this."

She began to pace the room. Walking in her wedding dress, I remember her looking ethereal.

"You're just nervous," I said. "Everyone gets jitters on their wedding day. Just take a few deep breaths and you'll be fine."

"But, I won't," Courtney replied. "In the letter I told Jason that I had to do what I should have done all those months ago and end everything. Of course I love Jason but I just can't do this to him or to me."

"The letter ... I thought he would understand," she continued. "But he didn't. I thought he would be okay with my decision but he wasn't. For the first time ever, he tried to talk me out of a choice that I wanted to make. He couldn't accept it."

And on it went ...

The explaining, the pleading for me not to go after Jason, the asking for me to respect her decision ...

I tried my hardest before walking back into the chapel to explain that the wedding was off. But apparently Jason had already done so as all the guests were gone. There was a lone person sitting in the front pew. Jason.

And for the first time in all of the years that I knew him, I had no idea of what to say to console him.

Instead, I turned and walked out.

Months went by before I heard anything regarding Jason or Courtney.

It was as if I had the wind knocked out of when I learned that Jason had left the penthouse. I was even more shocked when a few months later I received a letter from Courtney. All it said was that she was okay and needed a change of scenery.

She was clever, though. The return address was a P.O. box.

As for the entire situation, I can't say I was surprised that it came to such an ending.

As much as I encouraged Jason and Courtney, a bigger part of me knew it was wrong all along. I had spoken to Courtney about the affair and its possible affects but ultimately I knew it was her choice. Wrong or right, I won't comment if she and Jason deserved all of this or not.

My only real hope is that, wherever the two of them, and whatever they're doing or ... for that matter, who they're doing, that they're just happy. And as selfish as I can be most of the time, I truly mean it.

And as for that old saying my mother always repeats, sins of the soul ... well, they never end up giving you the endings that find themselves on the very last page of the fairytale books.


End file.
